You are describing emotional ambivalence. Based on perceived fears of closeness and commitment regarding intimacy and sharing a life without fears and doubts. No I am not sitting on the fence life is too short to procrastinate on such an important part of life....

Ummm.. did you not read what happened to Humpty Dumpty.?..
Lol

I like it when a woman sits on my fence.
Her thighs gripping tight so she doesn't fall off.
Face turned to the sky in pleasure from the sun bathing her face, warmth through her body.
Although it's kinda windy right now so she'd slightly rock side to side or forward and back.
She could sit on my fence all day.
But only until she had to get off.
My neighbors might not like it.


Everyone sits on the fence constantly.
There always has to be sufficient motivation to push them into making a choice to do or do not.

People won't really give you the opportunity to sit on the fence while trying to come to a decision regarding dating.

Even though it might appear they are patiently waiting, they have their own motives.
While you think they're sitting around waiting for you up on the fence, their perspective is changing regarding you.

For dating purposes it's never an all in or all out situation.
It's always shifting in a range.
The longer you sit, the more your attractiveness fades...or possibly improves if while you're sitting on the fence they aren't having to really do anything to get some benefits from you while sitting there.
And sometimes, that becomes the relationship, and as soon as you make a decision on which side of the fence you want to be on, it's change from the norm of you waffling on the fence.
e.g. sex, but not sure about a relationship, sitting and talking on the internet, but not sure about meeting and dating.


"Love?" No.
Enjoy? Appreciate? Utilize? Don't give a crap about one way or the other since it's not a part of my identity since I don't introduce myself "I'm a single guy!" (like "I'm a nice guy, I'm a good guy, I'm a white guy, I'm a student, I'm a bedouin footwear designer")?
Sure.


Not really.
People feel it all the time when they go to the store and see something and think "well, I can't really afford it...but I really want it."
Or "omg that looks soooo cool...but...do I really need it?"
Or "I don't know....I remember CD's...I've still got all those...do I really want an mp3 player? I've got all those DVD's, should I get a blu ray? I've got Facebook, do I really need twitter, or kik?"

People want the benefits of change, but they don't want the costs, risks, or consequences.

It's not a weird feeling unless you've structured your life towards never making a decision, always avoiding any type of conflict, change, and risk, instead pursuing pure selfish gratification and letting that just motivate you to crash through fences and then complain when it's not quite everything you wanted.


Human nature.
Sitting on the fence allows for time to rationalize a potential decision.
Are the costs greater if I stay or go to the other side?
Are the benefits positive enough to stay or go to the other side?

Nope ... Just one . Companionship. Intimacy is allways a + but not relevant.

Can't really say it is sitting on the fence.. But yea I do tend to like being able to do what I want to when I want to.

But still open if someone comes along and we have that connection. But not seriously looking for someone... If it happens it happens.. If not then I'm fine with the way things are~~~~~

My "sitting on the fence" feeling would be
1) because in the past, men have tended to want a serious relationship with me right from the start.
2) The bed IS comfy all by myself LOL
3) Afraid of making the same mistakes I have in the past

BUT....I really do miss having that best friend to talk to, someone to share responsibilities with, someone to enjoy the everyday pleasures with.

Very understandable Kimmers.. Many feel the same way you do, I can not help but notice you are new to the Forums, Just want to welcome you and invite you to stick around.. It helps with the boredom sometimes, and you may even make a friend or two!

Good Luck and Welcome again

Thanks xxxtobyxxx
Just an honest one, but thanks!
I have a serious problem with always being too honest, too trusting and too open

Thanks NObootyhunter
I have used chat forums way way way in the past and had a blast with them, so I think I will be around awhile

Great! Looking forward to seeing you in the threads..

Guilty as charge
I love being single to roam as I please. Maybe I'm being selfish.
There are times I do wish for a man to enjoy his company and do things with.
They are only sometimes

I love being independent, not having to answer to anyone. I can come and go as I please.
On the other hand I love having someone to work as a team.

Yes a fence sitter at the moment

Why can't I have the best of both worlds?

That's true
I am open for a partner
Until then why not enjoy being single.

Yes
It seems everyone is in a hurry to get together
Why not learn about each other

That's part of being on the fence you decide which side you want to go on

It's ok to take some time until you get a shock lol

Its not like I am sitting on the fence....I am prowling the fence looking for one that share my sentiments...is all.

At my age, I kinda feel I have been there done that and really there is not much left to achieve in this life....Except achieving inner peace and sanity....but, hey thats not much fun....So, all that is left is ...living on the edge.....Now, if you are someone that likes taking slight risks, adventurous and does not care or have little or no regard for being PC...we should be talking...all I am saying..

Nope, if she's got the goods and doesn't scare the crap outta me when I look at her, I'll date her.

I don't sit on the fence, i'd break the damn thing!

But like others sometimes it's good to have the best of both worlds.

Humpty sat on a wall, not a fence.