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| Topic: How do you??? | |
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fall out of love when you know someone is wrong for you? Do you? Or do you admit defeat and realise your heart may never beat again for a new love?
Is it fair to be with someone else when you feel that all your passion\love is now a withered flame incapable of relighting once more? |
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How do you...fall out of love when you know someone is wrong for you? Distance and distraction. Do you? It's possible. The better you are at delaying your personal gratification the easier it's going to be. do you admit defeat and realise your heart may never beat again for a new love? That's just rationalizing going back to what will make you feel good. Is it fair to be with someone else when you feel that all your passion\love is now a withered flame incapable of relighting once more? Life's not fair. Sometimes you just can't escape that you're simply a person, not a "good" person, and your purpose in life isn't to try and make it fair for everyone, and trying to make it fair is just trying to fulfill selfish desires. |
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As far as me I feel if both were in love to begin with. Then I would try everything I could to bring that flame back.
If it was one sided and I was the one in love and they were not. Then I see no reason to stay in the relationship... And would walk away and count my blessings I realized it before I invested to much time.. |
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I don't think I figured the whole love thing out yet. I thought I found love love in my last 2 relationships. They were about 7 years each.
But when we broke up, we went out separate ways, neither of us really fighting to get back together. I'll try again one day, I'm not giving up. Who wants to grow old alone? I don't. |
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Edited by
Unknow
on
Fri 01/08/16 09:46 AM
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It's kind of like falling out of a tree, you try not to get hurt on the way down but it's not always avoidable. I make this comparison because staying in a bad relationship starves you emotionally and in the long run can hurt you more then the fall. (And now I'm going to have to throw a movie quote from the Dark Knight) The reason we fall down is so we can learn how to pick ourselves back up.
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I don't believe that you have to stop loving someone, to start loving someone else. When a relationship ends, it hurts. Often people allow this pain to turn into anger, resentment, and spite. If the connection turned negative, these reactions are understandable. That said, I think we're better served to hold onto the positive aspects and let go of the negative. Our capacity to love is immense, it's unfortunate that we choose to put limitations on it.
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..it's unfortunate that we choose to put limitations on it. So true. The heart can hold infinite love methinks. Tis the mind that holds resentments. |
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fall out of love when you know someone is wrong for you? Do you? Or do you admit defeat and realise your heart may never beat again for a new love? Is it fair to be with someone else when you feel that all your passion\love is now a withered flame incapable of relighting once more? Easy. It's called a White Russian and you drink until you say "screw that biatch"!  
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Tried that Goof. Just hurt my head the next day.
Good advice people. Thanks for taking the time.  |
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fall out of love when you know someone is wrong for you? Do you? Or do you admit defeat and realise your heart may never beat again for a new love? Is it fair to be with someone else when you feel that all your passion\love is now a withered flame incapable of relighting once more? This is not a popular answer, but if you truly love someone, they could turn out to be the next child rapist or Ted Bundy and you will STILL love them. This does not by any means, mean that you agree with what they did, or condone it. This does not mean that you are not disgusted with them or even want anything to do with them; but you will still love them. And there is nothing wrong whatsoever with loving someone who is that bad of a person. EVERYBODY has SOME good in them, and it is the good that you fall in love with (or at least I would HOPE it's the good and not the bad lol). But being in love with someone does not mean you have to choose to be with them or to accept what they do if it is wrong. It just means that you love them. The way I look at things you have love and you have lust. Love has absolutely NOTHING to do with sex, and lust has EVERYTHING to do with sex. You can have one without the other and be the happiest person on the planet (look at our grandparents and great grandparents who had no say in regards to whom they married). Most people mistake lust for love, or think you HAVE to have lust in order to feel love and both are not true. |
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Tried that Goof. Just hurt my head the next day. Good advice people. Thanks for taking the time. That's why you take Tylenol right after the last drink.
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fall out of love when you know someone is wrong for you? Do you? Or do you admit defeat and realise your heart may never beat again for a new love? Is it fair to be with someone else when you feel that all your passion\love is now a withered flame incapable of relighting once more? This is not a popular answer, but if you truly love someone, they could turn out to be the next child rapist or Ted Bundy and you will STILL love them. This does not by any means, mean that you agree with what they did, or condone it. This does not mean that you are not disgusted with them or even want anything to do with them; but you will still love them. And there is nothing wrong whatsoever with loving someone who is that bad of a person. EVERYBODY has SOME good in them, and it is the good that you fall in love with (or at least I would HOPE it's the good and not the bad lol). But being in love with someone does not mean you have to choose to be with them or to accept what they do if it is wrong. It just means that you love them. The way I look at things you have love and you have lust. Love has absolutely NOTHING to do with sex, and lust has EVERYTHING to do with sex. You can have one without the other and be the happiest person on the planet (look at our grandparents and great grandparents who had no say in regards to whom they married). Most people mistake lust for love, or think you HAVE to have lust in order to feel love and both are not true. Nice answer. |
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fall out of love when you know someone is wrong for you? Do you? Or do you admit defeat and realise your heart may never beat again for a new love? Is it fair to be with someone else when you feel that all your passion\love is now a withered flame incapable of relighting once more? I believe that our love lessens or fades away when we find that the person we loved is wrong for us in different reasons depending on individual's situations. It just happens in a process as both true personalities emerge. Things happen and you realize that what used to be between you and your partner is no longer there. You may have tried to rekindle the passion, but everything just don't work out anymore, as long as you have exhausted possible means and ways to save your relationship yet still nothing works...... it's time to admit defeat, some good things never last. If the love is gone, be true to yourself and to your partner. You both can never be happy anymore when the love is only one sided. Talk about it and try to settle amicably. Be fair to one another and be matured in facing the truth, you just fall out of love. But this doesn't mean that your heart stops beating and incapable of loving anymore...... when the right one comes along, your heart will beat on its own and will rekindle the passion inside you. All it takes is a man with that burning love for you to set you on fire again , and only then love would be ablazed    
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" Marriage is not about finding the right person, its a matter of being the right person." (GBS)...all I can say...
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fall out of love when you know someone is wrong for you? Do you? When I made decision to leave my EX husband I thought about it and tried to make it work for over 3 years before I admitted I was beating a dead horse. I left moved over a 1000 miles away and started a new life for myself. Or do you admit defeat and realise your heart may never beat again for a new love? At the point I decide to leave my heart doesn't get a vote my logic has taken over. I know that a heart heals in time no matter what I want or think. Is it fair to be with someone else when you feel that all your passion\love is now a withered flame incapable of relighting once more? When I leave a relationship I don't even date til I have done my grieving for that relationship of what was and what could have been. Then I forgive myself and them for both of us killing it. I do believe no matter what it takes two. During this time I have done a lot of home renovating, hiking etc...to work off the energy of letting go. Then when I am whole again I may start to date but even with Pancho, I wasn't looking for love I was looking for companionship, a deep friendship and it turned into so much more. I have never looked at someone during the first initial steps of dating as " Could this be the one"... I look at them as someone that has intrigued me. |
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