You are so selfish.... you never make time for me....lol.. has being alone on your own all these years made you into a selfish person.. you have become so used to doing what you want when you want to.. that now when you get into a relationship.. you have forgotten how to share your time.. do you think you are selfish..
.. when it comes to making time for your new partner

i didnt when i was with my last
maybe ask me again when i find another : )

My gosh some of your postings make me reflect
With the ex no it was about him and the kids then it became all about the kids. No they gave nearly gone.
Yes I have fallen into that trap it's all about me and what I want. I have never been on my own since I was 17.
My thinking has been about me and not taking anyone else into consideration.

I don't think I am very selfish with my time. The only thing I can think of at the moment is being able to read books when I want. I would not mind reading the same book with my man and then we could discuss it. Sometimes I like to cook alone, but I'd like to have a man who enjoys cooking with me, which I have not had. I feel that I would always make time for my partner with whatever he wants.

.. oh that sounds exciting let's sit across from each other quietly reading the same book and then discuss it amongst ourselves..yup... I'll make the popcorn.. you melt the butter..lol... and if I had a nickel for every time a woman said I will be happy to make time for whatever he wants to do.. I would have $0.25...
. Because usually when they find out what I want to do... they start getting this very scared look on their face..lol..

.. I know bro!!! it's almost like I'm in your head right..lol

..Well I will ask you again when you hopefully fine.. someone

Maybe it's just the way I am, or maybe it's part of having been a parent to children who needed extra care, but my struggle has tended to be to be selfish ENOUGH.

Some relationships fail because the participants don't see to their own emotional needs and concerns, and then when they "share" with their mate, they can only share negatives.

I think we do get more set in our ways the longer we are alone, which includes the 'me myself and I' time.
I do think, however, that when partners are right for each other, it will sort of go by itself, because you'd also want to do stuff together. And no, I don't mean just sex.

I know from experience I will spend far less time on the PC/internet when I'm with a guy.
But ... I think it's very important to still have your own personal time. I value my freedom and personal time, had that in my last relationship too, whereas in the first one I had close to none. I can't live that way, glued together. Drives me insane!

And no, I wouldn't want to give that up. I still need to paint, write, do whatever. Be me.
But there should be a healthy balance. Otherwise, what's the point of being in a relationship?

Of course the need for spending time together and apart should be sort of the same.

.. well thanks for not being so selfish and sharing..lol.wink..
But totally get the first part of your statement.. if you are a giver.... you get so used to giving of yourself freely.. you forget how to be a bit selfish.. even when you know you should say no to someone.. you don't and then you quietly beat yourself up..

I'm not sure about the last part of your statement what that's all about.. because I always take care of my own needs..lol.wink... okay I'm not really winking at you like as in ..wink wink.. because that would just be a little creepy..lol.. .. okay I'm going to go blow something up now.. maybe squishes spider..lol

i don't think
that suicide
It's selfish
what's selfish is
keeping alive
someone who is so miserable
that they would rather die
than live another day
in their own mind.

(*a few ways to look at this*)

^It's just an example of selfishness. A sad one, unfortunately.

----------------------------------------------

As for me, what can I say, I always try to make time for everything, the best I can.

I am trying to figure out what it looks like to be the ideal nothing. And I'm trying to frame that in a way that makes me feel great about everything I do in my life.

Time for myself, for my family, work, more work, etcetera etcetera.
Sometimes I fail,
Sometimes I'm selfish,
Sometimes I'm only human.

Maybe I need more time...

My work and sleep schedules, simply aren't negotiable... for anyone... for any reason.

If that makes me selfish,
I'm okay with that.

.ohh.k.. not really sure where you're going with the suicide thing..
. But the last little part I actually understood ..

one of my friends is the same way.. work and sleep are his priorities..
Unfortunately this has sabotaged more than one relationship of his.....
You will make plans to go on a date with a woman... then work will call him.. he will cancel the date just to go into work... he does this a lot..
I started this topic actually because of his behavior.....lol.. he does other selfish things as well..ok. I'm not saying this is selfish I'm just saying it seems selfish..lol... I keep telling him if you want to keep a relationship you actually have to make time even on those days when you don't have time..
Yup..... he just says yeah but I like to sleep..lol

Thanks no1phD, I can see that you are making fun of me. Well I am looking for a nice man who can treat me nice. I have said many times here that I want a man that likes going on road trips since that is one of my favorite things. I happen to enjoy reading a lot and it would be nice to have a man who enjoys reading some things I like.

..no.no.. not making fun of you..nooooo...lol... I think it's actually very endearing... you and your man friend sitting by a roaring fire quietly reading..hmm.. what is this book you two are going to be reading by the way.. ..?. Science fiction perhaps.....
Maybe a fantasy novel.. wink

Yea bro
So when I do something wrong it's all your fault.

..well. that depends are you Catholic?.. because in their eyes touching yourself is wrong...
.. and I can't tell you! how many times I've been blame for that..lmfao..

Ewwwe gross

Everything after 5:00 p.m., is my time.

Warren Buffett, Bill Gates, the Saudi royal family, and the Wal-Mart corporation, couldn't combine their resources, to come up with enough of a retainer fee to get me to be "on call".