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| Topic: is distance a barrier if... | |
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you really like the person? TBH, Most ( people or) most women want real dates, real men, real contact. Myself, I would not even attempt a long distance relationship. So I wouldn't never get to the point of "really like ".... and I don't think words on a screen or a face or voice would ever be enough for me to bond with... or anything else  Well let's say one or both of you has the means to travel, you see each other every couple months and the plan is to move into together at some point. This could work. I prefer real dates myself, but if I met a woman here who I really dig, but who lived within 8 hours drive, I could swing that. As long as it's close enough that I can drive, hang out and drive back within 3 or 4 days at least for the first meeting, I think that would have a shot. |
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so what if you start to chat as friends and you see you really like that person.12hour drive isnt that big of a deal,,do that twice a month,,if thay are worth it,its easy to pull off,jmho
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so what if you start to chat as friends and you see you really like that person.12hour drive isnt that big of a deal,,do that twice a month,,if thay are worth it,its easy to pull off,jmho My ex and I started out in person, then she moved 500 miles away for 2 years, I drove every weekend then we moved in together. Of course gas was ~$1.00 per gallon then, it was 98-99. But I would for sure do something like drive 500 miles every two weeks for the one I love. |
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You talk to someone you like them enough to make the effort to meet and then you REALLY like them I think most people would start planning something workable for both sides. Life is too short to spend it wishing your love interest is going to move in next door. All relationship are a risk and you sometimes win sometimes loose.
I can tell you from being a career soldiers wife if you have a strong relationship the moving is just part of the deal. The true friends we made and our quality family ties withstood the distance. Yea affording travel, long distance, and even before it was popular computers were just normal family expenses. I hate to think what my children's life would have been like had I just passed on someone who wasn't "local". But I didn't just pack up and follow without some serious investigation and making sure I always had an out if things went south on a relationship. I wouldn't do that now. |
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You talk to someone you like them enough to make the effort to meet and then you REALLY like them I think most people would start planning something workable for both sides. Life is too short to spend it wishing your love interest is going to move in next door. All relationship are a risk and you sometimes win sometimes loose. I can tell you from being a career soldiers wife if you have a strong relationship the moving is just part of the deal. The true friends we made and our quality family ties withstood the distance. Yea affording travel, long distance, and even before it was popular computers were just normal family expenses. I hate to think what my children's life would have been like had I just passed on someone who wasn't "local". But I didn't just pack up and follow without some serious investigation and making sure I always had an out if things went south on a relationship. I wouldn't do that now. Exactly. If you want a truly great reward, you have to be willing to take a risk. You might loose, but if you don't try you'll always wonder what if. |
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It's not the distance in miles but the distance in minds that 'so plagues' this world today!
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Ya I did that "whether thou goest thing" ummmm..no
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Long distance relationships are not without problems, but if you have strong feelings the distance does not have to become a barrier...I see it as more of a hindrance...I totally agree with others here who say one (or both) must be able and willing to relocate...The couple's financial and familial situation usually plays a major role in deciding that...
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Ya I did that "whether thou goest thing" ummmm..no  Ruth 1:15 * a woman said it to another woman..*
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Yes her mother in law.
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See a lot of women saying they would drop everything for right man..I just don't get that..meaning what exactly? Yank your kids out school,put house on market,quit your job,leave behind family and friends
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See a lot of women saying they would drop everything for right man..I just don't get that..meaning what exactly? Yank your kids out school,put house on market,quit your job,leave behind family and friends I USED to think it was a cultural thing. Now... I'm not so sure...Hhhaaaa. I have seen this mentality on date sites for 3 yrs.. But very rarely in real life. For me, twice a week may not be enough. Each time I tried that (2xs a week).. only lasted 18 mo to 3yrs.. * long term to me is at least a DECADE  . I was with my ex husband for 15 yrs *
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I was with mine for 20 and because of his job he was required to be gone a lot. I wouldn't wish that lifestyle on anyone
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Edited by
SparklingCrystal 💖💎
on
Fri 05/29/15 08:32 AM
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See a lot of women saying they would drop everything for right man..I just don't get that..meaning what exactly? Yank your kids out school,put house on market,quit your job,leave behind family and friends Not every woman has children at home, or owns a house. I have done it before, and yes, I moved my kids, gave up my rental, and had to drive quite a distance to work, when I moved in with him. I wouldn't easily do that anymore. Not that I have kids at home still, nor do I own a house, and I haven't got a job either. So in that sense I can go wherever I want to go. But I will not prematurely give up my own home, my house, for a man. It's a rental, but still my home. Not unless I was really quite sure. Been there, done that, you live and learn. Apart from that, the only thing that would hold me back, is my son. We don't see each other very often, but moving to the other side of the world, no way. Already got my daughter on the other side of the big pool, do not want to be an 8+ hours flight away from both kids. My parents or friends don't hold me here. My son does. . . |
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Worked in school system and saw lot of kids getting moved all over place everytime mom or dad got a new person in their life. Swore I would never do that to my own . I have a son starting high school in fall and that means we stay put til he graduates and gets.settled in at college. At that point I will look at where both my sons are and go from there
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life is short...jump in, have some fun, see were it goes:)
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Pain fades, but good memories last forever:)
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Pain fades, but good memories last forever:) That's a nice sentiment and I agree, but pain only fades when we remove the source.... |
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It is different for everyone.. I have tried the LDR it is hard and found out it was not for me.. At the point and time in my life.. with my job, kids , grand kids and family. I'm not willing to move at all..
Not saying it does not work for I have seen it work more then one time.. Sure one has to be where they can move that is one of the main factors... Myself I prefer local only and ones that have their own place lmao.. |
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Pain fades, but good memories last forever:) That's a nice sentiment and I agree, but pain only fades when we remove the source.... then sometimes we remove that source and realize that the memories far outway the pain... |
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