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| Topic: How Do YOU feel about violent men or women? | |
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I once let the "C Word" fly with my 17yo gf Karen S. She threw a right cross and knocked me over the hood of my car. I ABHOR violence!.....but I deserved it! I have never used that word in a moment of anger since. I will love Karen S. til the day I die for that lesson! OMG!.....you deserved it ya little ****! 
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How Do YOU feel about violent men or women?
They make me so mad I want to kick their ***. Or call the cops so the cops come and kick and taze their ***. When they claim to have changed and act nice should we trust them?
How many years have gone by and what kind of support and changes in their life do I have evidence of? Did they chase me down a month after we broke up in order to tell me they changed because they need me to know and absolve them and they want something from me to try again? Or at 39 did I just happen to run into someone I was in an abusive relationship with for 6 months when I was 16? Or should we just move on.
Even if you move on there is no guarantee the next person isn't abusive. If you have a history of getting into a lot of relationships all with abusive men/women and can't seem to get out of that pattern no matter what you do maybe you should give someone the benefit of the doubt that they changed. Then if they don't, cheat on them with a more abusive ex and let those two fight it out while you steal their wallets and run of and join a nunnery. |
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.. now are we talking slap and tickle violence... choke me right to the point I'm about to black out and then let go.... step on me with your high heels...lol...
. or do I need to put some boxing gloves on.. put em up put em up..lol.. ... yeah I was raised that you are not ever to hit a woman no matter what... .. no matter how hard they keep pushing your buttons..... the only exception is her sister is trying to kill me..... 4.2 timing her.. with her sister...lol . |
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If a woman hits me even once, the relationship pretty much ends right there. Well....what happens if she hits you once, but you hit her back more than once? In all my twenty over years of marriage, I have to admit I hit my husband on the shoulder once......yes ONCE, in a fit of frustration when we were arguing about something! But with the kind of strength I have and my size (he is 5'11" and I am 5'2"), it turned out to be more of a smack. I'm glad he did not hit me back though, cos' if he had, I am sure I would have been bruised and hurt physically..... we are no match to brute men strength. |
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I love my new sista. 
ah the clarity to say what I can not.
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now are we talking slap and tickle violence... choke me right to the point I'm about to black out and then let go.... step on me with your high heels...lol...
no, I think were talking about when cowards hit women. |
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now are we talking slap and tickle violence... choke me right to the point I'm about to black out and then let go.... step on me with your high heels...lol... no, I think were talking about when cowards hit women. And maybe, women hitting men??? |
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I believe people can change, let present actions matter most but be mindful of past actions
if one has a history of violence, I keep my personal time alone with them out of the question until I see them interacting differently in situations that once would inspire them to violence I believe in giving people a chance at changing , learning, and evolving,,, |
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If a woman hits me even once, the relationship pretty much ends right there. Well....what happens if she hits you once, but you hit her back more than once? In all my twenty over years of marriage, I have to admit I hit my husband on the shoulder once......yes ONCE, in a fit of frustration when we were arguing about something! But with the kind of strength I have and my size (he is 5'11" and I am 5'2"), it turned out to be more of a smack. I'm glad he did not hit me back though, cos' if he had, I am sure I would have been bruised and hurt physically..... we are no match to brute men strength. Can't really answer the question, because, I don't hit women. In the event of a rarity, where I might feel endangered, I may bear hug to restrain, until I can remove myself to safety. But, I do not hit. |
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If a woman hits me even once, the relationship pretty much ends right there. Well....what happens if she hits you once, but you hit her back more than once? In all my twenty over years of marriage, I have to admit I hit my husband on the shoulder once......yes ONCE, in a fit of frustration when we were arguing about something! But with the kind of strength I have and my size (he is 5'11" and I am 5'2"), it turned out to be more of a smack. I'm glad he did not hit me back though, cos' if he had, I am sure I would have been bruised and hurt physically..... we are no match to brute men strength. Can't really answer the question, because, I don't hit women. In the event of a rarity, where I might feel endangered, I may bear hug to restrain, until I can remove myself to safety. But, I do not hit. I hope for your sake you never do, and never did! |
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Sure people can change but not over night. So who suffers in the mean time? For me its not worth finding out. For me its better to forgive and move on.
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Ohh... so we can't slap them around just to keep them in line...hmm..
you know! a good smack upside the head.. to remind them who the boss is...hmm..... those kind of cowards..? .... the type of guy that is so angry with his life.. he doesn't know how to express himself without violence.... .. screams and yells all the time.... ... that kind of coward..? ... I'm the man you're just the little woman... you should learn how to keep your trap zipped.... . that kind of coward..? ... yeah I know the type you're talking. About..... when I was a kid I grew up with the neighbor across the street like that... at least until my dad went over and kick the s*** out of him... . .. |
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now are we talking slap and tickle violence... choke me right to the point I'm about to black out and then let go.... step on me with your high heels...lol... no, I think were talking about when cowards hit women. And maybe, women hitting men??? I am sure that happens too. But a man should be a man and just walk away from that and never put his hands up to a woman. ever. you just don't hit women.. it is never acceptable JMO |
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most say that you the victim antagonized them in some way that you asked for it or had it coming that if you had just kept your mouth shut and been sweeter and did what they said it never would have come to this abuse can be more than just getting punched or kicked or having a chair thrown at you or choked it can be not allowing you to leave, taking your keys, your purse it can be controlling you so that you do not have access to a car, a phone or the bank account separating you from your friends and family isolating you so that you are easier to control it can be saying mean and insulting things to you such as you are stupid, fat or ugly as a way of undermining your self esteem keeping track of your every move all the while telling you that they have what is best for you in mind Ooooh yes ^^^^^^ Also they like to make you look crazy or feel crazy. My kids dad would hide my stuff and tell me I never owned such things....stupid **** like that. All I can say is life is sooooo sweet without him! 
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This kind of behaviour doesn't usually change...I left my husband when I was pregnant and had a two year old toddler. I had already given him enough chances hoping he would change. He left me battered and bruised again because I left a cup on the table and went to bed early due to morning sickness. I was advised if I stayed I probably would not carry to term. So I left to protect my children. There was a lot of pressure from his family to return but I had a lot of support from my family to be able to make it on my own. It was tough but so much better than the alternative.
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If a woman hits me even once, the relationship pretty much ends right there. Well....what happens if she hits you once, but you hit her back more than once? In all my twenty over years of marriage, I have to admit I hit my husband on the shoulder once......yes ONCE, in a fit of frustration when we were arguing about something! But with the kind of strength I have and my size (he is 5'11" and I am 5'2"), it turned out to be more of a smack. I'm glad he did not hit me back though, cos' if he had, I am sure I would have been bruised and hurt physically..... we are no match to brute men strength. Can't really answer the question, because, I don't hit women. In the event of a rarity, where I might feel endangered, I may bear hug to restrain, until I can remove myself to safety. But, I do not hit. I hope for your sake you never do, and never did! Simply, not my nature. People who do stupid things, have criminal conviction records. |
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Edited by
TMommy
on
Thu 04/30/15 07:08 PM
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many women are too scared to pick up the phone and call the cops
many believe that this would only increase the danger they would find themselves in when he gets out again because by doing so..having the cop car show up at house with lights flashing and kids bawling and neighbors gawking it will humiliate the abuser and enrage him for now the community knows and his cover of being a great guy is blown or they think by doing so, they will forever ruin any future chances that he may somehow change and they will become a happy little family |
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now are we talking slap and tickle violence... choke me right to the point I'm about to black out and then let go.... step on me with your high heels...lol... no, I think were talking about when cowards hit women. And maybe, women hitting men??? I am sure that happens too. But a man should be a man and just walk away from that and never put his hands up to a woman. ever. you just don't hit women.. it is never acceptable JMO I agree cos' when a woman who is smaller in size and stature than her man hits him, with her small little fists ...... he should just grab her small little fists, say sorry and kiss her!!! 
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seriously, if someone hits you tell them sorry and kiss them?
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This kind of behaviour doesn't usually change...I left my husband when I was pregnant and had a two year old toddler. I had already given him enough chances hoping he would change. He left me battered and bruised again because I left a cup on the table and went to bed early due to morning sickness. I was advised if I stayed I probably would not carry to term. So I left to protect my children. There was a lot of pressure from his family to return but I had a lot of support from my family to be able to make it on my own. It was tough but so much better than the alternative.
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