Well, folks. I have read through many of these poems and none of them has really captured my attention. I stop reading before I even finish because they don't keep me reading it. To be fair, I have not read every single one posted so perhaps there is one that would. By no means am I trying to put anyone down as even an attempt at writing deserves some praise. However, I think that many of you are trying too hard and writing what you feel. Don't do that! The following quote is mine. I made it up! Read it and hear it!

"Don't write what you feel, feel what you write!"

To me it seems that many of you are simply writing what you can conjour in your head. That's your mistake! Never write from your head! Write from your heart! Your heart is what gives you true feeling. Your heart is what gives your pen its true power!

The following poem is one that I wrote. Its about a real girl that at one time I did actually fall in love with. Its truely written from the heart.

And just to note. This poem is fully protected by U.S. and International copyright laws.

Fly

For just a moment, I thought I could fly
In that moment, I could reach the sky
Never in time has my reach gone this far
Never in time had this beat captured my heart

There was a connection between you and I
It was a connection that helped me fly
Words were spoken that seemed so very true
Now they are nothing, not without you

When I took your kiss
There was still more that I would need
It was your kiss that let me feel you when I breathe
It'��s no lie, the trance you put me through
It'��s no lie, I fell in love with you

This flight I was on
It ended before it began
This flight I was on
Became my heart pounding end

My wings were clipped as I was in flight
I came crashing to Earth as I lost my light
Never before has my soul felt so blue
As it only sings near a picture of you.

Meh, I would rather read Tommy, Up2us, KC, mowilflower, teasingbrunette and Leigh anyday....
1 point for your attempt though.
I found it cleche and boring seen as you asked for constructive critism. Try harder!!Maybe use your head and heart.

That's fair. :-)

Me, Myself and I. That's all you have to say? Nice try/troll anyway. About your poem it could be abridged 6 to 8 rows. And still your poem could easily keep the same thought and message.

Usually, I would not even comment but you found it necessary to be critical of others and I agree with Ladywind.

I ask, "Where is your heart?" I read what you wrote, but it had no feeling, it had no heart or power to move. It was boring... there was no heart!

I take no claim to being a poet but I would probably write something like this:

Flying, flying farther than ever before,
reaching the sky, never gone this far,
in a trance, feelings, it felt like love,
heart beating faster, a connection,
captured by words, and kisses, surely
this is how it feels to fly to the sky!

Only a dream, flight ended before it began,
wings clipped, lost in flight, crashing to earth,
crushed, so blue without you, like never before,
now there is nothing, no connection, no flying,
my heart pounding ended, no light, no song,
unless I sing to your picture, holding it near...

Well i thought by the way he was talking at the start that this will be good, but in reality it was crap! OP, you've judged every other persons work on here, then came out with a poem that couldn't lace any of their boots? Must try harder if you wanna be anything like the other poets on here who are good and don't blow their own trumpet about it either!

Here I sit, so broken hearted
Paid my dime, and only farted.
From henceforth, I shall wipe the floor
And crawl, crawl, beneath the door.

If that's not from head and heart.
Nothing is.

work protected by copyright

pancho, a smile tickled my face, a poet I never figured you to be, but that was with head and heart.

Thank you, Mowildflower
In my younger, whimsically romantic days, I enjoyed writing poetry and plays.
One play was actually produced by a school.
Now...I'm just silly.
I do enjoy your work.

Ya ya.. I know

That is beautiful. Thanks for sharing!