Why is it that the institution of marriage is falling in the 21st Century? Who is to blame is it man or woman?

in my grandparents day, marriage was division of labor for survival..now its being happy and fulfilled when there is a time where one is not happy its time to go…..we have turned liberal,its the lack of a firm value system thats the glue to keep a couple together long enough to know that there relationship will withstand hard times…. its so wonderful when a person can love another who is not always perfect...yes my grandparents had real love that grew from being there for each other no matter what….i really miss them….

As my ex-husband stated to me: "Marriage is quite primitive. Our society has changed so much to where living alone is so much easier now and we don't need the institution of marriage anymore." I think many people believe this, but I am still old fashioned and want to be in a marriage, where through it all, my spouse will stick by me.

I think the idea of family roles, or roles at all, has gone down the drain

its hard to not have chaos when 'order' is considered a form of control and an attack on 'individualism'

people all set their own standard for what they want, there isn't so much a social 'norm' anymore about what family should be,, just anyone that 'loves' each other,, and love doesn't prove to be as binding as responsibility or expectation,,,

In my opinion lack of responsibility and acceptance of your mistakes is to be blame on. So, what about 50-50?

The blame for marriages falling apart is usually 50/50. Marriages stayed together before the 21st century as women didn't have a choice to walk away from an abusive man as she had no marketable jobs skills. Nowadays; women are more independent and can walk away from a bad situation. My mom stayed with my dad because of that and he beat her as well as us kids. Had she been self-sufficient; we wouldn't have had to suffer through that hell which has scarred me for life.

I agree with Navygirl. Not only were women dependent on their husbands, there was also the negative social stigma on a woman who divorced.

*hugs* navygirl.

Thanks.

Sins of the Father do not have to be visited on the children if they set standards and develop relationships with people who demonstrate better coping skills and healthier lifestyles; exp. non drinking.

My view for a successful marriage in the 21st Century is that it should be based on #real Love and #respect. The Bible says we should love our partners as we love our bodies. Surely is I love my wife why should I do all negative things to her like beat her, sleep around with other women... It also talks about respect. For us to gain respect, surely we should show it unto others regardless of our differences.
One of our folks (msharmony) here slightly touched the issue of "social norms" and this will try to answer why marriages are failling. I think our generation is parting from this 'norm' thing! We are seeing families that have no definite norms in their homes: the husband does not know the roles he plays nor the wife, the children have no direction and have no real parental guidance to orient them into the society and are neglected to a new 'good and entertaining parent, television (tel-a-vision), internet & caretakers/babysitters (sitting on your baby's rights).
we have concentrated much on stardom, fortune and fame neglecting the roles we need play in the homes for the sake of those children 'we' say 'we love.'
how about paying much time to our family by simply designing new rules and roles that the husband and the wife should play in bringing up a good family with well defined social norms? Today, if we look at the lifestyle of most of 'us' the issues of morality 'is failing us' because of the damaged social institution, a home.
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I would love to have a wife who is hard working as is the description in the book of proverbs not one who puts her family second. :)
*not edited #big hugs

awesome.

I wish he could understand how sweet it feels to be attached to someone, love them and be loved back. I mean you tried but they didn't see a reason for that. maybe family was a hindrance to making money and self-gratification? or otherwise :)

Sayy Whaaat....?!?