Topic: Old flames, exs as friends?
no photo
Sun 12/29/13 03:23 PM
Do you think is ok for married people to stay in contact with there exs?

soufiehere's photo
Sun 12/29/13 03:26 PM
Methinks the better you maintain a civility
towards the ex, the better it is for you.

groundzer007's photo
Sun 12/29/13 03:55 PM
not unless there's kids involved, you're usually ex's for a reason

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Sun 12/29/13 04:22 PM

not unless there's kids involved, you're usually ex's for a reason

This

PacificStar48's photo
Sun 12/29/13 04:22 PM

Do you think is ok for married people to stay in contact with there exs?


Well I don't marry anyone as a lark so at least I started out knowing I loved them so coming to the decision to go through the agony and expense emotionally and financially to divorce them
I REALLY must not want them in my life. So I am probably not wanting them in my kids life either so not likely going to have any contact that is not absolutely required and can not be accomplished any other way. That is pretty limited conditions.

PacificStar48's photo
Sun 12/29/13 04:22 PM

Do you think is ok for married people to stay in contact with there exs?


Well I don't marry anyone as a lark so at least I started out knowing I loved them so coming to the decision to go through the agony and expense emotionally and financially to divorce them
I REALLY must not want them in my life. So I am probably not wanting them in my kids life either so not likely going to have any contact that is not absolutely required and can not be accomplished any other way. That is pretty limited conditions.

no photo
Sun 12/29/13 05:24 PM
Yes its perfectly fine and a good thing.im good friends with my ex we still care for eachother and look out for eachother .

BettyB's photo
Sun 12/29/13 05:41 PM
I think its only ok if your partner is fine with it, otherwise you could end up adding another 'Ex' to your list.

msharmony's photo
Sun 12/29/13 06:03 PM

Do you think is ok for married people to stay in contact with there exs?



depends upon if there are kids and what the reason for the split

parents should always stay in contact with each other
and there are times when we try to 'date' someone who is just a better friend than romantic partner

I think real friends should keep in contact too

no photo
Sun 12/29/13 06:09 PM
it's an individual choice. A new partner's feelings are more important than an ex. And staying in touch for the sake of the kids doesn't require protracted contact. It will give potential new partners the message that you aren't ready; you haven't let go.

I think it is disrespectful to a new partner to make a point of keeping his predecessor in my life. TBH I'd have a hard time accepting it from a partner unless it was "just in passing." I'm not staying involved unless over means o-v-e-r

cha7385's photo
Sun 12/29/13 09:23 PM


Do you think is ok for married people to stay in contact with there exs?



depends upon if there are kids and what the reason for the split



relationship of old couples is affected by the reason of their split up. Being civil is fine for the kid's sake but you cant expect a spontaneous "chit chat" with them.

indignus's photo
Sun 12/29/13 10:32 PM
I don't see a problem with it. I think its a little crazy for a person to think they can tell their partner who they can be friends with.

no photo
Mon 12/30/13 12:49 AM
LowRange
Your answer I can relate to, I think it's good to care for someone Love goes beyond marriage. I'm proud to have good relationship with my ex but I know if I had a new partner ( someone actually serious who wants to marry) then obviously it would change out of respect. I think Love is fascinating and I am totally grateful to my ex. It's good to be at peace with an ex relationship as your heart can't open for the next relationship.

msharmony's photo
Mon 12/30/13 12:50 AM



Do you think is ok for married people to stay in contact with there exs?



depends upon if there are kids and what the reason for the split



relationship of old couples is affected by the reason of their split up. Being civil is fine for the kid's sake but you cant expect a spontaneous "chit chat" with them.



my sons father and I did our growing up together, we were great friends and we had a child, things happened that killed the 'romance', and we have definitely 'let go' of that part,, but we haven't 'let go' of loving each other and being friends,,,,

larsson71's photo
Mon 12/30/13 01:46 AM
If you have kids together, then you're always going to have a tie to that person. So it would be wise to remain civil to them, with some ground rules that any jealousies with new relationships be put aside, as the kids come 1st. If you don't have kids together, I don't see any point in remaining friends with them? I have enough friends as it is anyway, without maybe adding a jealous ex, to the equation!

unsure's photo
Mon 12/30/13 01:48 AM
Actually I think if both agree that they know nothing can go beyond the friendship zone, I think it is great. I am friends with my boy's father and we actually had Christmas Eve together. (gasp) We get together on lots of holidays and always have a good time with the boys.
I also think if either one of us had a partner, we would still have get togethers and always include each of the partners. We make better friends then a couple.
Besides IF you can do it for the children, why not!!!

Also he was very sick about 2 weeks ago and called me around 3:30 in the morning. He ended up dropping the phone and blacking out. I had to call 911 and I met them at the hospital. It is a good thing he called or it might not have turned out so good. flowerforyou It is nice to know that if either of us need help, we can count on each other.

no photo
Mon 12/30/13 10:36 AM
Thanks sunny daisy , but of course I would take my current partners feelings in consideration, to always put his needs and feelings first and never provoke jealousy or give him doubts .

no photo
Mon 12/30/13 10:37 AM
Thanks sunny daisy , but of course I would take my current partners feelings in consideration, to always put his needs and feelings first and never provoke jealousy or give him doubts .