I notice alot of white men don't message me at all, I send them a wink, or a hug or a kiss and I don't get a respond back. At lease send me back a wink or a hug letting me know that u got the message or u are interested or something. I bet if I was white a white woman they would send me a wink or message even if I sent them one or not. I makes me wish that I was white and not black cause nobody wants a black girl not even her own race wants her cause I don't get messages from black men either nobody. In fact my inbox is so dry I don't know what to do with that, I am here to find love and its not easy for me. Is it cause I am fat and ugly please be honest and trueful with me, and I won't get mad or anything?. I just want to know why nobody is messaging me especially white men. I need love too I want to be somebody's wife and girlfriend too. I have feelings too and I can tell that nobody wants to date and marry a black woman :(.

I beg your pardon Missy! I am a sexy azz chocolate woman! I am proud AS you should be to descend from king and queens! Don't you ever allow yourself to feel less because some guy.... White or black hasn't messaged you! Maybe it's the guys you are messaging... They may not be into you.. But so what. There are more men out there.

If you came across in a message to me, like you do in your message here? I wouldn't message you back either! No disrespect, but you keep putting yourself down and having a go at white guys? Why? I think Teebee is right? You're messaging the wrong people, but be yourself also, as it comes across like you don't like yourself, as you keep mentioning ' fat and ugly ' I wouldn't want to be with someone with no self-respect. Had that before with an ex and it was drama, drama, drama! Not for me! Looking at your picture though I don't see anything wrong with you? It's all in your head!

I've been on this site for a long time and have never had anybody message me so just be patient.

I winked at you ?
lol


Happy Holidays !

I totaly agree 100%

Oh dear oh dear!!
It all starts with you!!

Love yourself first...it will show on the outside,then,men will follow you!!

Be confident in what you have and who you are! Its NOT about color,its about YOU the person!!

Build your self esteeem! Ugly is only a mind thing-there are soooo many men who have women who one would see as"not that apealing",BUT,someone chose them!

There are men who looove love plus size women! Men who love big butts! Men who love curves!

And btw,dont wink or nudge! Write them something; read a profile,find something interesting about it? Thats your openning topic!!


Finally,
Stay positive! The load on your shoulders does you no good,stop carrying it!

Have fun in the forums too!!

After reading your profile,i notice that,its a bit bland...sorry if am too blunt!

A bit of expansion might be good-not just mentioning points.. And also,tell the guys what kind of man you'd be interested in! Am sure a "come hither" wouldnt hurt! Make them want to find out more about you!
And the photos show a very confident,gorgeous woman!!
Good luck!

Proudly African!!

Hi Sweetheart

I hope you find tons of love, in whatever color!

It does seem a little harder these days to find that special person. The world moves at such a fast pace and people so many times have their eyes on the distractions rather than wonderful simplicity of love's overflow.

Personally though I think you should just let that love vibe that you and all of us have spill and watch it return. It doesn't always come back to us according to our list, but it is never far from our heart's eye.

Do we get any cheese with this whine?

Why is it necessary for someone to pay attention to you if the majority of what you post is saying you are being scammed, complaining, and self loathing? Has anyone on Mingle told you that you are ugly or fat? Or that they reject you only because of your race? What about just the above post makes you interesting or fun to interact with? What about that kind of demeanor would make you a good girlfriend or wife? Who would want a person they have to chronically build up?

Only 8 posts and you are whimpering how you just are not getting enough responses? Give me a break! When you break five hundred posts yea maybe then you might have a beef.

You already did the profile thing and ignored what you were recommended there.

Don't know why you are beating the race thing to death. There are all kinds of quality people of every race and combination of races imaginable on Mingle and many who could care less what your race is in the decision to date you or not. Might help if you would just make up your mind what you want. Just a warm body doesn't qualify. Well at least not if you really want to be a girlfriend or potential wife.

Anyone else think that was kinda a bit racist there?? Saying that you would get messages or winks if you were white? Basically saying white men only like white woman???? That's such BS. What a generalization you just threw out there for white guys like myself.

I have only dated white women......I guess you can throw me in your generalization now can't you? Wrong. I woman in every ethnicity beautiful. Black, white, Asian, East Indian, Latino......Hell, my brother married an East Indian, I have a friend who is East Indian and she is gorgeous(got a weeeeeee bit of a crush on her!).

Be proud of who you are, and as most everyone has said in this thread, just because guys don't msg you back, it isn't the end of the world......I have put myself down as well before(Height, the way I look, the way I talk, the things I like, don't like)......It doesn't attract people at all. What you need to do is learn to accept yourself more then anything. Learn to be yourself with yourself and try and get a positive attitude about yourself and that type of people will start to surround you.

But please, cut the crap about no one wanting to marry a black woman. That doesn't belong coming out of anyones mouth or being typed from someone fingers onto a screen.

You may indeed want to work on your self-esteem, at this rate you're bound to end up with the wrong guy that takes advantage of you. You make yourself a very easy prey.
People with low self-esteem don't make attractive partners, they depend on others to feel good. No one wants that burden on their shoulders as it will drag them down as well.

As for skin colour, the only one that puts value to that here, is you. When did it become compulsory for white men to react to black women? Reversed discrimination if you ask me. White men also have freedom of choice.
Nothing against mixed relationships but why do you explicitly want a white partner? Start looking for love instead.
And plug in your brain: if you send a kiss/hug/wink you expect a guy to send one back especially if he's NOT interested? So you know he got yours??? Does that make sense to you? I mean, really?!?!
No reply = not interested. Nudges don't work anyways. Try messages and the forums.

I also looked at your profile, very bare. Put more in there and stay in the positive. And tell what you are looking for in a partner.
I'd go for the 5th picture, it's really nice and shows much clearer what you look like than the one you're using now!

I don't wink or nudge back anyone (whatever race they are), so you needn't worry from that front. I expect those guys you're winking at just don't see the point of that feature, just as I don't.

In terms of messaging you, as others have said, if it feels like it's going to be hard work, why would they? This message sounds like they have a fight on their hands to get you to see you're beautiful and sexy. Particularly as you seem to have some issues around race yourself. What's the fascination with white men? They're men, just the same. Right? Some men like to help build a woman's confidence, but most prefer a woman to believe that first and foremost before they'll believe it.

That's not to say they'll see your pictures and run, as I doubt that's the case. What they probably see is what you're saying and not want to get involved in that "drama", as Larsson puts it.

Relax, enjoy your time getting to know people, and don't put yourself down. It really has nothing to do with race at all and everything to do with confidence and loving yourself.

I like that pic Mochacream!
You are a cutie!

Remember, Falling in love starts with yourself! My mom always told me that only you can be you, so ROCK IT!

ok, I'm paraphrasing... but you get the point!

Phenomenal Woman



Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.


Maya Angelou

Hey whats all this crazy talk about no one wanting you because your a black woman. Not true at all black women are just as beautiful as any other woman maybe even more. Your in a dry spell thats all. Stay the course, be patient sometimes you think your not being noticed and then you will have several emails. I think your beautiful and you have a electric smile and I'm sure some young man will notice you very soon.God bless you and best of luck!

Like that picture!
Good luck & keep that smile on your face!

For the O.P.

This happens to me a lot actually I'll get a wink nudge or kiss blown at me with nothing else. If you nudge or send anything else it helps to send an introduction first. At least say hello how are you?I'm______. And strike up a conversation with something that caught your eye in their profile or something, anything, it really doesn't matter. I mean really its plain ol' good manners. I personally think its kinda rude to just nudge me out of the blue without even a hello. Think of it this way walk up behind a complete stranger and nudge them. Most reactions will be like. "Wtf?!" Not really a good way to make a first impression in my book. I delete pretty much all of the nudges I get that don't come with at least a hello. If someone can't make enough effort to at least type me a hello I don't have the energy to reply.

I dunno if you did that or not and I'm not saying anything like that to you personally. I am just sharing my experience with this particular subject. Don't forget there are guys out there that believe beauty is found in all shapes, sizes, colors and attributes. If someone doesn't see you as the beautiful person you are. They can totally go sit on their own thumbs and rotate and aren't worth your time or energy anyway.

These ^

I get winks and nudges all the time, and just don't respond to them unless I already know the person sending them. Personally, I find them intrusive and annoying for the most part and on the disrespectful side in some ways. As stated, if I know someone pretty well, I do not mind them so much.

Thank you guys I feel alot better about myself and also looking for love. You guys are a blessing from God, so God bless all of you. Thanks alot and take care !!!

so wink at a latino once in a while
http://youtu.be/lC4LJPNBrFU