(Just journalling opposed to been direct:take or leave Minglers, Thnx

I will just close out and say that I'm hard on
myself and have high expectations of myself
only. Money can be a good motivator & a necessity.
For most all of us that are still alive in my
Profession, we do not do the job for money,as we say "if your here for the money you'll just get killed" So its hard to go back now and use
something as a stepping stone that was your passion
and our jobs become a big part of who we are.
IDK I never seem to have the whole package,
balance or relationships,just loose Money and work
when I feel.
Its hard to go after 'something' when your always
had that 'something'even know that, that 'something'is the KEY to something much more.

"Every bodies problems THEIR worst"

Can you please let us know briefly how it related to the topic? I read it, but I'm not quite sure.

All that writing you'd think there'd be something in there? Yeah?/ no? Well it felt good ;-)
..I may have to get the Doctor to prescribe me some Methyphenidate (brain candy)
so I can concentrate better on mingles in future
and start posting from a desk top so I can be more aware of poor sentence structuring. Then me & you
good or what?

I was just curious as to how it related to the topic. That's all.

I don't know, you would have to ask Billy, but he's not in right now, did he fail the assignment miserably? Its sounds like it,I didn't read
it myself. When he gets back we will sit him in the chair & see what he has to say for himself,as to what was he thinking? OK

This goes along with my example. There are some who want to get involved with those who have been divorced, rather than those who are single, because I guess it proves something to them?

Look, whatever issue you have with me is a one sided thing. I asked you to explain what you were talking about and you chose not to. That's fine. But I will ask you to please stay on topic here. Thanks.

So I did finely talk to Billy about his poor performance
on his paper and I questioned him on been facisius and his inability to answers a direct questions.
He said he's an individualist and a nonconformist
and refuses to play second fiddle to no one.
Hey don't shoot the messenger please,its just what Billy said.
He also said The Dixie Chicks & him
are "Not ready to make nice" just quit yet.

well this is what he wrote:

"Im not ready to make nice
I'm not ready to back down
I'm still made as hell & I dont have the time
to go round.. & round.... & round
its to late to make it right
probably wouldn't if I could
'cause I'm still mad as hell
cant bring myself
to do what it is you thInk I should.
~The Dixie's~
Ok apparently Billy's ready to make nice now
Fricken Billy! I wish he'd make up his mind.
But we're not sure about the Dixie's but Canada
Loves them.

Billy said he was going to do some Ritalin
and fall in..WOW what a change..Billy's bin
known to lie though

When I was younger I had all these things I wanted by a certain age, business , cabin, wife, kids but life can truly change your path and reality can change your plans big time so now I just go with the flow and face the challenges that the day brings.

I never really tried to plan things out like that and never hit it off well with those who did.

So what you're saying is you have multiple personalities, you're both still mad about whatever it is that pissed you off and you're both determined to post nonsense, rather than actually contribute to the topic. Got it.

When it comes to relationships and interaction with others, I think it's impossible to completely eliminate expectations, but I do think it's something a person should be aware of and "handle with care" if they want to avoid unnecessary disappointment and frustration...IMO, it's a big mistake to measure others according to your personal yardstick...It's just a set up to fail because you either end up being disappointed in yourself or disappointed in them....

Wow Leigh..This is an excellent post. Very well said.

I think you been sniffing to much Canadian Dixie .,

It might be best to say that "with age wisdom MAY come" because in many cases wisdom seems to have failed to arrive with passing decades (or actually reversed itself).



"projections of your own self" is right on.



Agree 100% -- society and people in general DO have expectations based on age. Some of that may be based in maturation processes but much is just folklore, custom, averages or other "one size fits all" thinking.



Understand and agree. Since my thoughts and actions NEVER have fit the typical, I learned long ago to totally disregard what others think, say or do. What they do is none of my business, and what I do is none of theirs.

I don't think it's fair to expect someone to have done something or acquired something by a certain age. All people should be married by X number of years. All people should own a home by the age of X. If you are X years old, you should be financially responsible for yourself. Hogwash!

X is a variable, hence it varies! Over time and with life circumstances, things change. What good would it do anyways to apply these generic standards? Okay, I got married by 25 like I was supposed to, but now I'm 30 and divorced three times. Is that better? (Not true for me, just an example, but still.) So what if I owned a home by the time I was 20? Now I'm 44 and I live in a box beside the road. Do you see what I mean?

Who's to say what someone should or shouldn't have by a certain age. Makes no sense to look at someone's life and someone's age and see if they're where they're supposed to be. Only the person walking in those shoes knows the path they travel and where they're supposed to be at any given time.

"Judge not lest ye be judged" comes to mind...

There are no rules in life other than not breaking the law of your lands....Live and let live and please...
CHALLENGE YOUR MIND...

I think there are risks involved either way,, but it may be more of feeling 'equally yoked' so to speak

as a divorcee myself, I probably would feel less comfortable with a lifelong single person with no kids as I wouldn't feel they had had enough similar experience to be able to really relate to where I am in life,,

a single person who at least has kids,, had that similar experience even if they didn't have the papers because they have the children,,,

but that's just me

My advice to anyone is to do what is right for you at whatever age or time it happens. Its your life. Life is all about choices. Often the choices we make lead to predictable outcomes most of the time. We have no control over mother nature, inherited health problems, what others do, or obstacles placed in our path.

My son is in college finishing up his last year for his bachelors degree. My advice to him was to fund retirement maximums the first several years. Save for your house and keep driving your paid off car. Live at home or get a roommate to live simply. Once you feel ready then buy your home. Change the retirement contributions to less but that chunk of money will work with time and could be borrowed against if really needed later. Going back in time our forefathers mostly bought things with cash or had the majority of the money and made a smaller loan. Most of us work hard to get secure and progress over time. Being secure makes it easier to live life the way you want it. Saving $200 a week will give you 52k in 5 years. Nice down payment on a house. Smaller mortgage. More paycheck to keep when/if you meet someone and decide to settle down.

Honestly being alone is far better then with someone and miserable. I would respect anyone alone who did not settle for someone less than they deserve. If you take a good look around society is full of bad examples and a few good ones too. Knowing what is good or bad for you is all that matters. For example: I won't date a man who drinks alcohol all the time and cannot be without it but would date a man who might have a few drinks socially or watching sports. Once in a while overdoing it.

Looking at a person you have gotten to know and then basing a determination on whether you will be friends on whether they've hit all the stages in life at the correct intervals seem silly.

I know a young man who still lives at home in his middle 20s, but he is doing that because he is a graduate student and even though his education involves university employment he doesn't make a lot and has loans from undergrad school also. He probably could afford a small studio, but why should he? He should save his money, and by living at home he can still help out.

There is a common sense wisdom that says men who have never married (by the age of 30 or 40 or so) are mama's boys or selfish. That may be true for some but certainly not all. In today's economy people are marrying and having children much later than say.....25 yrs ago.

Whether I could be in a relationship with a never married man of advanced age would depend on many other things. And that would never stand in the way of us at least being friends. My expectation is to be treated well, not to necessarily share a common history.