Games are so stupid. Why can't we as adults stop the games and be real? Say what we mean? Be straight forward? I do keep thoughts and feelings inside, but that is something I do for self preservation. But if I'm done with a person I tell them. If I like a person I tell them. So over all the mixed messages and game playing.

For some people, that's all they know how to do, and they wouldn't know honesty or a true emotion if it bit them in the proverbial a s s.

Ladies I so agree with what you've both said. You would think grown ups would just be up front and it would save a lot of grief, heartache, bad feelings and a host of other emotional negativity. Games are for kids. Kids don't need to be in serious dating relationships! Sad that some don't know what honesty and being up-front really means.

Yeah, people have actually gotten angry at me for being so honest, but I'd much rather have honesty than a bunch of lies.

I've been getting emails from an ex that messed me around and played a lot of stupid games. She says that I was always getting too serious and she had toled me that it was a casual relationship.

When I was seeing her she wouldn't talk about her feelings and say it to my face but she sent me a lot of emails that were all about how happy she was that she had me and how she hoped that time would be on our side. She said that she wanted it to be romantic and when she asked me in an email how I felt about her and if I really liked her as a person I told her and then she gave me this stuff about it just being a casual relationship again and dumped me by email. I was being too serious because I got fed up with her starting s**t with me over the internet and saying that I thought that we needed to have a proper chat.

It took me a while to get over it and now she's emailing me again and I told her what I thought about her and about the way that she had treated me. I don't want to be bitter about it and I hadn't even been thinking about her until she contacted me again. She's saying again that she's looking for an honest guy and she can't even tell the truth about her own age. I'm trying to not be bitter about it because I don't want somebody like that anyway and I wouldn't take her back if she begged me. Even saying that makes me sound a bit bitter though.

I've got another ex girlfriend that treated me badly and I was angry with her for a long time but I've forgiven her and now we are good friends again. That's different though because I was with her for three years and did really care about her. I should just tell this other one that I'm not interested and even though I said that I hoped that we could still be friends, she was the one that said that we had different lives and and wanted different things and that that was why it couldn't work.

hi peachy--if you take the audience away the show closes--we all have a part---we all have favorite feelings we are trying to recycle--last but not least we have beliefs about ourselves and others that we are trying to validate that are formed in childhood as a child---hence the drama triangle where you have a victim,a persecutor,and a rescuer---most people have a starting gate position in the triangle---the answer is self-awareness--when we see our own stuff it makes it easier to see understand others---and make healthier choices---i hope this will help---good luck---

That makes sense, I just want to know why we can't be more open with each other. I don't regret anything I have done, ever. I always learn from it and move on. Just the way some go about things is more hurtful to others, and I don't know if its that they don't care, or they think they are sparing the other persons feelings. Just be honest.

Yep, most people who play games are doing it because they are in the game themselves somewhere. Many are not even aware how deeply they are in their own game.

Some people may be unsure or not wish to cause offence so are deliberately vague, which could be construed as game playing, when in fact it is not meant that way.

Circumstances alter cases, it is just a thought, that sometimes things are not always as clear as black and white for everyone.

hi again peachy--nobody is all good or all bad--one way i learn a lot about people is watch them around family or get them to talk about family--our family knows how to push our buttons and bring out our good and not so good sides of our selves--learn as much as you can about yourself--one tool i use for my self is when something is going on between me and another and i start to feel like mad sad or scared i will stop and think to my self--how am i like that?--do i do that?--self awareness is the only answer---when a person can not get or thinks they cannot get love-joy-happiness--etc---they will always take-pain-unhappiness--etc--because it makes them feel alive--feelings are what makes human---we always have a choice when we explore our options oh by the way STUFFING OUR FEELINGS IS NOT THE ANSWER--DON'T DO THAT --IT WILL HARM YOU IN THE LONG RUN-