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| Topic: why can't teachers have lives outside of school | |
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Why should a teacher not be able to date a former student?
Here's what I mean, Ill give you a predicament. Say that a student was taught by a teacher and they ended up meeting and falling in love after High School (say, 4-5 years down the line) and the age difference wasn't too big of a gap (5 years top). Why should this be frowned upon? Why should schools put a limitation on who you fall in love with. I personally don't think that it should be allowed for a corporation to interfere with anyone's love lives unless it started in school. But what if it didn't. What if later down the line the school makes a rule for no dating students (former or not) but a teacher is already in a relationship with one. What do you think? If two people love each other should they be together regardless? The point of this question is to justify ALL relationships around the world. Regardless of type. As long as big parties are adults and both parties love each other should it really matter? Or is the world really that selfish and possessive. |
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No it wouldn't matter,in any case.
the student teacher senerio is fine they cant take the job or put anyone in jail so what's the problem |
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There's a reason for this rule, although I'm not sure this never dating a former student is the rule here too.
It's to protect minors AND teachers from sexual harassment charges. It had happened at the school I was teaching at the time, that an innocent teacher got done for sexual harassment by a student with a grudge. He was innocent, proven it too. But his reputation was ruined nonetheless. He had to find himself another school to teach at, which is real hard if you have such a reputation, even if it's a false one. These things can ruin lives and careers. Maybe that poor man is now a garbage-man cos some stupid teenage girl had a grudge for not getting a better grade. I mean ... bluddy 'ell! |
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i don't know if you mean high schools or universities , but for me , i have dated my English teacher in the 1st year of college for almost 5 years , and it was one of the best and longest relationships i have ever had ...
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Have to agree with Crystal. Nothing wrong with after the student has graduated, but if we are talking high school then during the time of student-teacher relationship, no, no, no. I am a former principal and I surely would have fired any teacher for stepping over this line. School was in a small town and I even laid down the rule that teachers were not to be in the local taverns anytime. That was in an era when you could lay down rules and discipline students.
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Well, anyways, my girlfriend (former teacher) broke up with me and was depressed because her job said no dating former students. But the conflict is that, we were already together after I graduated (and 18) before that rule. So who the Hell are they to try and interfer with a teacher's outside life? Teachers fall in love like everyone else and rather it's with awho is no one's business UNLESS it affects her job. (In any case it didn't).
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Did she lose her license? Because my ex seems to fall under the impression that she will. -_-
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Like I said, there's reasons for these rules. As a teacher you have certain responsibilities and you are part of a school's reputation, which is a decisive factor for parents choosing for their kids to go to that school, or not.
Which means it is not desired nor acceptable for teachers to display specific behaviour or do things that can damage the school's reputation, as this can ruin the school. (meaning all employed teachers will lose their income). It's goes beyond the individual. And it also comes with the territory, any teacher will know that too. I wouldn't choose a school for my kids if I knew that it was common for its teachers to get involved with their pupils, or get in trouble during the weekend for whatever. So sorry, in some professions your private life, choices and behaviour DO matter!! Whether she will lose her license, no idea. I live in a different country. She should get some legal help if need be. |
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Like I said, there's reasons for these rules. As a teacher you have certain responsibilities and you are part of a school's reputation, which is a decisive factor for parents choosing for their kids to go to that school, or not. Which means it is not desired nor acceptable for teachers to display specific behaviour or do things that can damage the school's reputation, as this can ruin the school. (meaning all employed teachers will lose their income). It's goes beyond the individual. And it also comes with the territory, any teacher will know that too. I wouldn't choose a school for my kids if I knew that it was common for its teachers to get involved with their pupils, or get in trouble during the weekend for whatever. So sorry, in some professions your private life, choices and behaviour DO matter!! Whether she will lose her license, no idea. I live in a different country. She should get some legal help if need be. And this is exactly what I mean. People such as yourself overlook the focus. What I'm saying is, love is not controlled. It comes in all colors, morals, senders, preferences, nationalities, religions etc. No one knows what the future holds. Had said that, if a teacher meets and connects with someone outside of school after graduation, why should they he considered a creep for it. My teacher was only 23 I'll be 19 this year. That's the problem with society, they seem to look at what's in front of them instead of the situation. This all also plays on the same line of racism, gay marriage, age differences (as long as both parties are adults) that people always have negative feedback for. No one can ever be happy for someone who falls in love. But it's cool. I wouldn't expect less from a blinded, brainwashed generation. :/ |
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No it wouldn't matter,in any case. the student teacher senerio is fine they cant take the job or put anyone in jail so what's the problem Of course its a major conflict of interest to date a student at the school your teaching at,that's a no brainer! But down the road is just 2 consenting adults,it should be no concern of the school |
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Why? Because there's no way to prove you weren't romantically involved before you graduated. You're only 18 so it's a reasonable assumption.
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Why? Because there's no way to prove you weren't romantically involved before you graduated. You're only 18 so it's a reasonable assumption. There's no way to prove you were either. The thread doesn't apply to me. It applies to LOVE. Assming is not how we get through. There's their side and then there's the TRUTH. If society can't accept the TRUTH, there really shouldn't be laws in the first place. |
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Personally, I think it's unethical, but that's just me. I agree with Msmyka, there's no way to prove when your relationship began or ended, and it just looks shady. Besides, I could never have romantic feelings for any of my students, my mind would never go there. To each his own....
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Edited by
mccdijon
on
Tue 10/01/13 12:42 PM
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Personally, I think it's unethical, but that's just me. I agree with Msmyka, there's no way to prove when your relationship began or ended, and it just looks shady. Besides, I could never have romantic feelings for any of my students, my mind would never go there. To each his own.... Read what I said, and it very so COUOD be a way to prove it. Its called no proof :P. That's like saying your best friend (that you have feelings for) teaches you how to do something. And since he did. You can't date him. Seriously, its none of no ones business. Who the **** are you to tell someone who they can and cannot date? People get mad when others don't mind their business, but when it comes to things like this "ooh its unethical". A career is something that you use to be successful. That career, however, does not control your personal life. |
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Edited by
paintecards01
on
Tue 10/01/13 12:51 PM
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We have rules and laws in place to protect those who can't protect themselves. It's wrong of an adult to have a sexual relationship with someone who is under 18, I don't care how mature the child THINKS he/she is.
It is wrong of anyone in a position of power or authority to use that power to manipulate the actions or behavior of someone who is weaker and has less authority than they do. I used to work at a university where it was understood that if any female wanted to advance in her career, ie. go from a secretary to a faculty member, she had to sleep with the president of the university. That is wrong because she wasn't in a position to say no, if she did, she could lose her job, or he could make her life unbearable, forcing her to quit. If a teacher approaches a student and asks for sexual favors, the student doesn't have a choice unless he/she wants to get a lower grade. If a student approaches a teacher, the teacher is in charge and should accept that responsibility by refusal to engage in an unethical act. UNLESS BOTH PARTIES HAVE AN EQUAL DISTRIBUTION OF POWER, IT IS WRONG. If there were no rules in place, we would have a chaotic society, I don't want to live that way, and most people I know don't either. Just because you don't like the laws, doesn't make them wrong, and just because you want to do something doesn't make it right. Maybe when you're my age, you'll have a better understanding. Good luck in whatever it is you're trying to prove; I'm leaving this thread before I lose my temper with someone young enough to be my child.  |
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We have rules and laws in place to protect those who can't protect themselves. It's wrong of an adult to have a sexual relationship with someone who is under 18, I don't care how mature the child THINKS he/she is. It is wrong of anyone in a position of power or authority to use that power to manipulate the actions or behavior of someone who is weaker and has less authority than they do. I used to work at a university where it was understood that if any female wanted to advance in her career, ie. go from a secretary to a faculty member, she had to sleep with the president of the university. That is wrong because she wasn't in a position to say no, if she did, she could lose her job, or he could make her life unbearable, forcing her to quit. If a teacher approaches a student and asks for sexual favors, the student doesn't have a choice unless he/she wants to get a lower grade. If a student approaches a teacher, the teacher is in charge and should accept that responsibility by refusal to engage in an unethical act. UNLESS BOTH PARTIES HAVE AN EQUAL DISTRIBUTION OF POWER, IT IS WRONG. If there were no rules in place, we would have a chaotic society, I don't want to live that way, and most people I know don't either. Just because you don't like the laws, doesn't make them wrong, and just because you want to do something doesn't make it right. Maybe when you're my age, you'll have a better understanding. Good luck in whatever it is you're trying to prove; I'm leaving this thread before I lose my temper with someone young enough to be my child. Oooh ok. I get it now. You guys just don't read. :/. Apparently everyone keeps saying under 18. Well if ypu can point me to a post made by me where I said that, I'd gladly stfu. And EVEN IF 18, already graduated. :) .....don't worry ill wait.... |
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Edited by
Dodo_David
on
Tue 10/01/13 04:20 PM
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mccdijon, your profile says that you are age 18 as of 1 October 2013.
So, don't be surprised if others don't agree with your desire to be with a former teacher of yours. |
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Edited by
mccdijon
on
Tue 10/01/13 04:55 PM
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mccdijon, your profile says that you are age 18 as of 1 October 2013. So, don't be surprised if others don't agree with your desire to be with a former teacher of yours. Dodo_David, did you read the OP? I only said about a million times that it doesn't ONLY apply to me. I'd assume that most people here aren't illiterate, but the ways things are lookingis making me start to doubt that assumption. |
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mccdijon, your profile says that you are age 18 as of 1 October 2013. So, don't be surprised if others don't agree with your desire to be with a former teacher of yours. Dodo_David, did you read the OP? I only said about a million times that it doesn't ONLY apply to me. I'd assume that most people here aren't illiterate, but the ways things are lookingis making me start to doubt that assumption. mccdijon, what I read was these statements that you posted: My teacher was only 23 I'll be 19 this year. Well, anyways, my girlfriend (former teacher) broke up with me and was depressed because her job said no dating former students.
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mccdijon, your profile says that you are age 18 as of 1 October 2013. So, don't be surprised if others don't agree with your desire to be with a former teacher of yours. Dodo_David, did you read the OP? I only said about a million times that it doesn't ONLY apply to me. I'd assume that most people here aren't illiterate, but the ways things are lookingis making me start to doubt that assumption. mccdijon, what I read was these statements that you posted: My teacher was only 23 I'll be 19 this year. Well, anyways, my girlfriend (former teacher) broke up with me and was depressed because her job said no dating former students. Dodo_David, It would make sense that you pin point out only a crumb of the entire cookie. I wonder if you eat the seeds and throw away the fruit? Just curious. |
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