Do you think a man's age, life stage, or generation (that he is from) will affect his treatment of a partner.

not meaning monetary issues - like buying us stuff - but more in line with compatability and expectations

any opinion is welcome. please avoid personal comments in disagreements and please avoid asking others to "prove things." It sounds like the kindergarten playground..lol, thanks.

I wonder if a younger man would have more "livable" and less traditional or authoritarian expectations? Or would a man my age be relaxed in expectations just because we tend to be that way as we age?

Or maybe it's just an individual thing irrespective of age where some men will treat women as equal partners because they were raised that way?

I have always heard, that a man will treat a woman
exactly as he has seen done (by his parents) or go
diametrically different.
No middle ground.

I tend to believe this.

It's different for different people.
No one person lives the exact life of another.
Meaning that you can't blanket all men based on age or generation.

It depends on the guy.
We're not all robots programmed the same way or bound by the ways of our parents or ancestors.

really. I tend to agree to an extent. no one is saying that anyone is a programmed robot. I am not sure you understand what I am asking.

I wasn't assuming anything about all men, more about trends or changes that might occur as values and behaviors change with different generations

for example in my experience men older than I am tend to feel comfortable in a somewhat authoritative role but as a personal style I cannot tolerate that. if he's not my boss at work...he cannot tell me what to do. with my younger boyfriends (2 of them) I really did not have that issue.

but my experience is only that of one person so I was wondering what others thought

thank you moonsdragon

interesting. yes I was told by a great aunt to watch how a man treats waitresses and his mother because that is how you will be treated.

My mom always used to say the younger ones were easier to train...



{snicker]

ID make the leap to say,, older men will probably have a tendency to be brought up with certain 'roles' and 'responsibility'

and younger men will probably have more of a tendency to just be about their self,, no role except 'whatever floats your boat' kind of thing,,,,


but then, many younger men were raised up by those older men and may have those same values in them,,, and some older men werent brought up with those roles and responsibilities at all,,,

yes I suppose I see the humor in that

but do you really want to have to train your partner?

I mean playing naughty policeman is one thing.....hmmmmmm

right some of the roles we play we learned from watching our parents, others we learn as we grow. some younger folks may not have had the need to really develop the roles they will neogtiate with a partner

I will also make a leap and say that men a generation or more younger than I am are more likely to have been raised by a mother who worked full time

so his potential for viewing the female role differently than the Ozzie & Harriet days may be increased

or not

as soufie said some people behave in reaction to how they were raised

Naughty policeman ...
You mean there's MORE ?
....Don't make me do stuff !

but it might be fun big guy

how' bout naughty policewoman???

This is a very interesting thread Sweetest Girl.
From what I personally have observed from younger men is they don't seem to be as stuck on the Gender Role as the older men are.
They seem to be more willing to help with the cooking and cleaning and being a more hands on Dad.

But I also wonder if their Ethnic back ground also plays a role.

thank you. I assume you mean traditional gender roles with the 1960s housewife - single breadwinner family

not even sure that is possible for couples at this point with the economy what it is

what do you mean by etnic background playing a role? like if they come from a very traditional cultural background?

Well I know when I was married I had to take care of the house work, cooking and cleaning take care of the kids and I also worked full time. I heard the term that's woman's work all the time.
My Husband was also Italian ,born and raised in Rome. That's the way it was there , the woman doted on the men.

So I think some cultures are still that way, but I could be wrong.

Interesting observations.

I wonder now if that has anything to do with the way I am. My parents respected one another, and make decisions jointly. My father didn't expect certain things from my mother. He never ordered her to do anything. She was equal to him in every way. That was the way he wanted it.

I think you're right. In situations like the one you describe he was probably raised to believe those things. His mother probably did not teach him to do laundry and cook in that kind of traditional family.

my sons did everything. they cooked and cleaned with me and worked in the garden and they also worked on cars and in the woodshop and had jobs in HS and college. so they can take care of themselves. that was my goal for them as a stay at home mom

a guy needs to be able to fend for himself - especially if both partners work FT

I knew grown ups who seemed like that when I was young, but my parents were a little more in the model where my dad was the boss

I did not see a lot of joint decision making as a child. I had to learn that on my own

that sounds like a great relationship that your folks had

I am glad too see things changing that way.

me too. I do like some of the traditional roles but hey, if my guy is a better cook!! I am happy to do the dishes and clean up!!!

Oh, about as much as a woman's age, life stage or generation (that she is from) will affect her treatment of a partner.