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| Topic: How do we win over the competition? | |
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My understanding all along this was fictional which is why I never had a legit answer for it. 
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My understanding all along this was fictional which is why I never had a legit answer for it.
Oh wait, I don't give legit answers to anything!!  
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My understanding all along this was fictional which is why I never had a legit answer for it.
Oh wait, I don't give legit answers to anything!!
Now that's a smart move considering all the scammers there are on these dating sites that like to take advantage of us unsuspecting people... especially the newbies who don't know the ropes until they've been burned once or twice... 
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For me i really have to consider that this is a dating site but i want it also to be natural in a way that i dont treat others here as a threat towards a guy. After all its a guys decision if whos who. They are here to settle/if they want to settle down so they must know how to narrow down, same with us. If ever he dont agree of me still chatting with my friends then its up to him. He must know where my loyalty is. hi winlei... so to you, it is important that you both know where your loyalty is toward each other? And if his loyalty rests more with another woman than with you, do you accept his divided feelings? he doesn't care Athena and of course he will correct if wrong, but what I mean is from what I have heard him say on here he is not pursuing a commitment....my impression is that he may also be doing some frolicking when they are not together. As for myself. if I knew my partner was bothered by me flirting with someone else on here who I was talking with before we got together, I'd respect that and tone it down. The nature of the former relationship changes because it would not be appropriate for me to be flirting with others. I would not be chatting up other men in the PM. My profile would also reflect a relationship status if I had one. I tend to be quite concious of behaving with loyalty and respect. All the things I have stated I would want in return. I do not think things would last long otherwise. I don't really care for "ladies man" types anyway. and let me add that I would expect us both to keep all of our friends, and others who we call our friends would respect our relationship status and not try to cause jealousy or trouble if they are really our friends. It could definitely be a weeding out time, but hopefully that would not be necessary. I agree... we should keep our friends... and those we call friends so long as they aren't trouble makers, and want to be both our friends... and it's this kind of issue where I'm a stickler... if there's a woman whose deliberately trying to instigate trouble for us, and he chooses to side with her even when he tells me that he knows what she's doing and that it isn't right, then I immediately see something seriously wrong with the picture, and have to refocus my thoughts and actions to protect myself... the secrecy behind their clandestine chats is what bothers me... I'm open about everything, while he is not... if u are open and he is not there is an imbalance in the equilibrim. You have to now decide to "tolerate" or not...or walk away or not....it is not an easy subject to raise with a new man because no matter you phrase it - it will probably coming out soundign like "my way or the highway" but if the values are so out of sync that could be the choise. It would bother me also. It is a relative kinda thing but to me it is inappropriate that's the whole thing in a nutshell... if everything was above board there wouldn't be any chats that I wouldn't be made privy too... there'd be nothing to hide... and it's not about being able to play the privacy card, when I was the topic of conversation... and I don't tolerate a "traitor in my camp"... even though I live out loud and prefer to be an open book, for my own political reasons, it's my story to tell... and if someone claims to love me they don't show me disrespect and break my trust... especially when the info being shared turned this 3rd party against me, and they never bothered to check with me to see if it was true or what the basis for it is... like I said previously, it all boils down to respect... and the fact that I wasn't shown any because of the imbalance in values... well not sure there isn't always some degree of imbalance partners are not clones...lol it's whether there is more balance than imbalance and whether the areas where there is some imbalance are dealbreakers, in my opinion if a guys doesn;t like Italian food (my favorite) it's OK, but if he has a secret online "thing" with another woman. not OK. that is infidelity that you've been decribing. he's a cheater, athena |
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If a single woman is the best match for a single man, then that woman will not have any so-called "rivals". Also, a single man is a free agent while he is single. The fact that a single man is having sex with a particular woman doesn't imply that the man belongs exclusively to the woman. If a woman wants exclusive rights to a man, then she needs to marry him. In other words, it doesn't matter if I'm in a relationship with you because I didn't sign a contract and I'll have sex with whoever I like. Pretty flimsy justification for cheating. Maybe you think like this but what you say here is not a "true" statement and it only reflects your own values. I agree with the first part though, tawt, as I'm sure you might too, right? "If a single woman is the best match for a single man, then that woman will not have any so-called "rivals"." it's just a given truth that when a man is happy at home he doesn't roam... Depends on what you mean by "rivals". There are plenty of men that are quite happy with the woman that they have at home but they still go out and chat up other women. In response to what you are saying in this thread about people that interfere, I think that I know what you mean but what tends to happen is that people go to their friends and family and they will talk about their partners to them. This is going to tend to turn them against the partner if what they are doing is complaining about their partner to them. Then you get your "interfering inlaws" when they might not have had anything against you to start off with. The "disloyalty" consists in talking about problems in your relationship with other people. I'm sure that we've all done it and I don't think that it particularly matters whether these other people are male or female. This topic isn't really about cheating at all. Maybe you see it that way because your husband had female friends and maybe women are worse when it comes to interfering in other people's relationships but I don't think that you are really going the right way about it when you say that you think that they should stop being friends with those people. That is just going to give your partner more to complain about and cause more conflict. If you don't get on with them then don't be friends with them and tell them to stay out of your relationship. If your relationship is strong enough it doesn't particularly matter what other people think. Tell your partner that you don't care what so and so thinks about you and to stop slagging you off to them every time there's an argument or a problem in your relationship because that is just going to cause more problems and turn people against you and your relationship. Yes, I know there are lots of men who are happy with their women at home, and still chat up other women. But, a man that doesn’t find me to be enough woman to meet all his needs, will find himself chatting up women from another woman’s house, becuz he won’t be doing it from mine, unless of course, he doesn’t mind me chatting up other men besides him. But if that is the case, what’s the point to our being together in the first place, if we don’t meet each other’s needs sufficiently? No, tawt, my original post didn’t mention cheating because that’s not what is in question in this particular scenario, it’s about disloyalty and disrespect… and to me, when both of these values are violated in combination it spells out the demise of a relationship, because it shows that there is no real connection between the partners when the one feels free to gossip about the other, while it destroys the trust completely… if I can’t trust someone with minor issues like keeping a simple confidence, or, not talking about me behind my back, there’s no way I can trust them with major issues... it's really just that simple Well, you probably wouldn't even know if the man you are with was down the pub trying to chat up the barmaid while you're cooking his dinner. Unless you are living in each other's pockets you just aren't going to know what he's doing when you aren't together and all you can really do is try to work out what sort of man you're getting involved with and whether or not he's the type that would just be happy with you and not be likely to do that sort of thing. A lot of women do fall for charmers that are good at chatting up women though. I don't know if it's entirely reasonable to expect someone to not talk about you and your relationship with other people. I talk to my family about my girlfriends. At the end of the day though, nothing that family or friends say about someone that I'm with really matters and they aren't going to influence my decisions. A family member asks me how I'm getting on with a girlfriend and if it's going well I say so and if it isn't I say so as well. I just tell them how I'm feeling and what's going on in my life because I come from a close family but I still make my own choices and if they don't like the woman that I'm with that's tough because I am an adult and I do make my own decisions. Of course, if I was with someone and she said to me that she was saying something to me in confidence and she didn't want me talking to other people about it that would be a different matter but you can't expect someone that you are with to not talk about you to other people that are close to them. Also, if the relationship is going well and you aren't doing anything wrong where is the problem? Okay… let me clarify something about me… for political reasons I live my life out loud… openly… there’s nothing about my life, no matter how good, bad, praise worthy, or embarrassing it may be that I won’t reveal myself if and when absolutely necessary… I’m human and I’m flawed, I make mistakes and I mend my ways when I goof up… our entire lives are on record, some have deeper paper trails then others… because I’ve been writing my own story to leave behind after I die, I’ve spent thousands of dollars over the last 20 years obtaining every bit of documentation that has ever been created about me so that I can more accurately detail my life and its history. And there’s not too many of my more serious flubs that people don’t already know about. So, I don’t have anything to hide that I don’t share with my family, friends, enemies, etc… and I don’t have a problem with people talking about me with each other, even if they are bad mouthing me, because face it, not everybody likes us and always has only good things to say about us. With that said… I’ll now present you with another hypothetical scenario, so you can try to understand my position more clearly, without my revealing names or confidences… Me and a man join a dating site around the same time… the man then approached me via email and we strike up a conversation that soon leads us to begin a friendship. I live in the South and he lives in the North, so we can’t meet in person, but we talk on the phone, email, IM, and we spend hours, days, weeks, and months sharing our lives, our stories, our feelings, and our friendship grows pretty close. So I think… But we are still strangers from completely different backgrounds… so our values, standards, beliefs, education levels, social standings, everything about us is new to each others worlds, and even though we accept our differences and enjoy each others company long distance, they still exist and can at times cause us to butt heads over issues… well, while we’re growing this friendship behind the scenes, we’re also posting on the forums, and he lets everybody know via a post that we are working together on one of my stories… this is a small world, so when new couples get together those who pay attention to the details about what everybody else is doing make note of it… then one day, as everything was going swimmingly we hit a snag over a very important issue that brought our friendship to a halt… and of course, I had to vent my feelings through my art, and posted a poem about our first disagreement… at this time… another female member contacted my now ex-friend to find out what was going on between us… well, we had become so close that we didn’t want to stay apart, and soon reunited, putting that little tiff behind us… but he and the female member decided to post their own version of our events, and when I read what she said, I realized they must have spoken about us and it was then he said that he didn’t know her until she’d emailed him to find out if he was okay after our breakup… which I thought was strange, becuz if they weren't already friends, why would she be contacting a male to inquire about his personal business... instead of contacting the female side of the relationship… well, I set this idle curiosity to the side and we resumed our friendship… only now we decide to keep the extent of it private and off the boards… then he decides to quit posting altogether, but doesn’t want me to stop, so he encourages me to continue writing and posting… while he refuses to acknowledge our friendship anymore… going so far as ignoring my posts while he posted to others around me… and this other female member who had previous to their allegedly first email contact responded to my work, then suddenly stopped posting her replies on my work too… like she was boycotting me on his behalf… she even became more aggressive toward me over time, which led me to ask him what was going on between the two of them… he denied everything and said it was all in my mind… only the trail of bread crumbs can reveal the hypothetical path of this scenario… and because of the type of friendship they have formed, in which he complains to her, then she strikes out at me as her way of defending him, is extremely inappropriate… and odd… because he still maintained to me that they aren’t friends… but, whatever is going on between the two of them, even if it is just a behind the scenes friendship, like he had going with me, there’s no room in one man’s life for two women… especially when one of them is highly aggressive and enjoys causing trouble… and he defends her to me every time she acts up… so much so that it’s obvious he has feelings for her… and I don’t play second fiddle to any woman… so the last time they ganged up on me I broke off our friendship again… because I needed to create enough space for them to show their true hands… and it was only at this time that he finally revealed his true condescending feelings about me… as he attacked me, she cheered him on… so… once they no longer felt they had to hide their tightly knit connection to each other, their joint actions against me confirmed what I’d suspected about them all along… So… now… if he and I were to reunite… under the circumstances that I describe in this hypothetical scenario… should I let them remain friends, or make him choose between me and her? Please keep in mind Tawt, that this is a fictional scenario that I’m presenting so you can get a different point of view about whether I should let him keep his friendship to this particular woman, if we were still together… What? You posted this thread to have a rant about something that never actually happened? If that's the way you see it... You certainly have an active imagination. I'll give you my opinion anyway, since you went to all of this trouble writing this story. He's not your boyfriend and he never was. You never met him and you were just friends that chatted on the internet and on the phone. You chose to make whatever you want to call your relationship public though and you were trolled. Whether or not you want to resume your friendship with this fictional character is entirely your decision but you really can't control who he chooses to talk to on the internet. It's very simple really. If you don't like the way someone on a dating site is behaving towards you then say so or ignore them. And it is entirely up to you who you choose to be friends with on the internet and it is your decision if you want more than just a virtual friendship with them. |
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If a single woman is the best match for a single man, then that woman will not have any so-called "rivals". Also, a single man is a free agent while he is single. The fact that a single man is having sex with a particular woman doesn't imply that the man belongs exclusively to the woman. If a woman wants exclusive rights to a man, then she needs to marry him. In other words, it doesn't matter if I'm in a relationship with you because I didn't sign a contract and I'll have sex with whoever I like. Pretty flimsy justification for cheating. Maybe you think like this but what you say here is not a "true" statement and it only reflects your own values. I agree with the first part though, tawt, as I'm sure you might too, right? "If a single woman is the best match for a single man, then that woman will not have any so-called "rivals"." it's just a given truth that when a man is happy at home he doesn't roam... Depends on what you mean by "rivals". There are plenty of men that are quite happy with the woman that they have at home but they still go out and chat up other women. In response to what you are saying in this thread about people that interfere, I think that I know what you mean but what tends to happen is that people go to their friends and family and they will talk about their partners to them. This is going to tend to turn them against the partner if what they are doing is complaining about their partner to them. Then you get your "interfering inlaws" when they might not have had anything against you to start off with. The "disloyalty" consists in talking about problems in your relationship with other people. I'm sure that we've all done it and I don't think that it particularly matters whether these other people are male or female. This topic isn't really about cheating at all. Maybe you see it that way because your husband had female friends and maybe women are worse when it comes to interfering in other people's relationships but I don't think that you are really going the right way about it when you say that you think that they should stop being friends with those people. That is just going to give your partner more to complain about and cause more conflict. If you don't get on with them then don't be friends with them and tell them to stay out of your relationship. If your relationship is strong enough it doesn't particularly matter what other people think. Tell your partner that you don't care what so and so thinks about you and to stop slagging you off to them every time there's an argument or a problem in your relationship because that is just going to cause more problems and turn people against you and your relationship. Yes, I know there are lots of men who are happy with their women at home, and still chat up other women. But, a man that doesn’t find me to be enough woman to meet all his needs, will find himself chatting up women from another woman’s house, becuz he won’t be doing it from mine, unless of course, he doesn’t mind me chatting up other men besides him. But if that is the case, what’s the point to our being together in the first place, if we don’t meet each other’s needs sufficiently? No, tawt, my original post didn’t mention cheating because that’s not what is in question in this particular scenario, it’s about disloyalty and disrespect… and to me, when both of these values are violated in combination it spells out the demise of a relationship, because it shows that there is no real connection between the partners when the one feels free to gossip about the other, while it destroys the trust completely… if I can’t trust someone with minor issues like keeping a simple confidence, or, not talking about me behind my back, there’s no way I can trust them with major issues... it's really just that simple Well, you probably wouldn't even know if the man you are with was down the pub trying to chat up the barmaid while you're cooking his dinner. Unless you are living in each other's pockets you just aren't going to know what he's doing when you aren't together and all you can really do is try to work out what sort of man you're getting involved with and whether or not he's the type that would just be happy with you and not be likely to do that sort of thing. A lot of women do fall for charmers that are good at chatting up women though. I don't know if it's entirely reasonable to expect someone to not talk about you and your relationship with other people. I talk to my family about my girlfriends. At the end of the day though, nothing that family or friends say about someone that I'm with really matters and they aren't going to influence my decisions. A family member asks me how I'm getting on with a girlfriend and if it's going well I say so and if it isn't I say so as well. I just tell them how I'm feeling and what's going on in my life because I come from a close family but I still make my own choices and if they don't like the woman that I'm with that's tough because I am an adult and I do make my own decisions. Of course, if I was with someone and she said to me that she was saying something to me in confidence and she didn't want me talking to other people about it that would be a different matter but you can't expect someone that you are with to not talk about you to other people that are close to them. Also, if the relationship is going well and you aren't doing anything wrong where is the problem? Okay… let me clarify something about me… for political reasons I live my life out loud… openly… there’s nothing about my life, no matter how good, bad, praise worthy, or embarrassing it may be that I won’t reveal myself if and when absolutely necessary… I’m human and I’m flawed, I make mistakes and I mend my ways when I goof up… our entire lives are on record, some have deeper paper trails then others… because I’ve been writing my own story to leave behind after I die, I’ve spent thousands of dollars over the last 20 years obtaining every bit of documentation that has ever been created about me so that I can more accurately detail my life and its history. And there’s not too many of my more serious flubs that people don’t already know about. So, I don’t have anything to hide that I don’t share with my family, friends, enemies, etc… and I don’t have a problem with people talking about me with each other, even if they are bad mouthing me, because face it, not everybody likes us and always has only good things to say about us. With that said… I’ll now present you with another hypothetical scenario, so you can try to understand my position more clearly, without my revealing names or confidences… Me and a man join a dating site around the same time… the man then approached me via email and we strike up a conversation that soon leads us to begin a friendship. I live in the South and he lives in the North, so we can’t meet in person, but we talk on the phone, email, IM, and we spend hours, days, weeks, and months sharing our lives, our stories, our feelings, and our friendship grows pretty close. So I think… But we are still strangers from completely different backgrounds… so our values, standards, beliefs, education levels, social standings, everything about us is new to each others worlds, and even though we accept our differences and enjoy each others company long distance, they still exist and can at times cause us to butt heads over issues… well, while we’re growing this friendship behind the scenes, we’re also posting on the forums, and he lets everybody know via a post that we are working together on one of my stories… this is a small world, so when new couples get together those who pay attention to the details about what everybody else is doing make note of it… then one day, as everything was going swimmingly we hit a snag over a very important issue that brought our friendship to a halt… and of course, I had to vent my feelings through my art, and posted a poem about our first disagreement… at this time… another female member contacted my now ex-friend to find out what was going on between us… well, we had become so close that we didn’t want to stay apart, and soon reunited, putting that little tiff behind us… but he and the female member decided to post their own version of our events, and when I read what she said, I realized they must have spoken about us and it was then he said that he didn’t know her until she’d emailed him to find out if he was okay after our breakup… which I thought was strange, becuz if they weren't already friends, why would she be contacting a male to inquire about his personal business... instead of contacting the female side of the relationship… well, I set this idle curiosity to the side and we resumed our friendship… only now we decide to keep the extent of it private and off the boards… then he decides to quit posting altogether, but doesn’t want me to stop, so he encourages me to continue writing and posting… while he refuses to acknowledge our friendship anymore… going so far as ignoring my posts while he posted to others around me… and this other female member who had previous to their allegedly first email contact responded to my work, then suddenly stopped posting her replies on my work too… like she was boycotting me on his behalf… she even became more aggressive toward me over time, which led me to ask him what was going on between the two of them… he denied everything and said it was all in my mind… only the trail of bread crumbs can reveal the hypothetical path of this scenario… and because of the type of friendship they have formed, in which he complains to her, then she strikes out at me as her way of defending him, is extremely inappropriate… and odd… because he still maintained to me that they aren’t friends… but, whatever is going on between the two of them, even if it is just a behind the scenes friendship, like he had going with me, there’s no room in one man’s life for two women… especially when one of them is highly aggressive and enjoys causing trouble… and he defends her to me every time she acts up… so much so that it’s obvious he has feelings for her… and I don’t play second fiddle to any woman… so the last time they ganged up on me I broke off our friendship again… because I needed to create enough space for them to show their true hands… and it was only at this time that he finally revealed his true condescending feelings about me… as he attacked me, she cheered him on… so… once they no longer felt they had to hide their tightly knit connection to each other, their joint actions against me confirmed what I’d suspected about them all along… So… now… if he and I were to reunite… under the circumstances that I describe in this hypothetical scenario… should I let them remain friends, or make him choose between me and her? Please keep in mind Tawt, that this is a fictional scenario that I’m presenting so you can get a different point of view about whether I should let him keep his friendship to this particular woman, if we were still together… What? You posted this thread to have a rant about something that never actually happened? If that's the way you see it... You certainly have an active imagination. I'll give you my opinion anyway, since you went to all of this trouble writing this story. He's not your boyfriend and he never was. You never met him and you were just friends that chatted on the internet and on the phone. You chose to make whatever you want to call your relationship public though and you were trolled. Whether or not you want to resume your friendship with this fictional character is entirely your decision but you really can't control who he chooses to talk to on the internet. It's very simple really. If you don't like the way someone on a dating site is behaving towards you then say so or ignore them. And it is entirely up to you who you choose to be friends with on the internet and it is your decision if you want more than just a virtual friendship with them. Thank you Tawt, for commenting on my active imagination... it comes in handy when I'm writing my fictional stories... and you're so right.. he wasn't my boyfriend and never will be... after all, if this fictional character was a real man that behaved like this toward me in real life, could you see me going back to him, or even claiming a relationship with him to begin with? C'mon... trolled, now that's a new word I'm not familiar with, but it sounds like it has such a bite that I would feel it if it happened to me...  guess I need to google the definition... and don't you worry your head over my decisions about making men friends, or telling them what they can do, or who they can talk too... cause I am just a woman and I know my place... 
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I’m still trying to get my relationship thinking cap on right, and I’m hoping the rest of you already might have yours on tight. So… as this is a dating site, where personal connections are made in the midst of the competition that exists, what are we supposed to think, say, and/or do if our partners/significant others makes it clear to us that they respect and will remain friends with the men and/or women that we both know are our rivals, and have acted accordingly towards us, should our partners loyalty to our known rivals be questionable, even actionable, such as being a deal breaker for us? If the amount of time has passed that you feel the relationship should be exclusive (with both of you agreeing on what is exclusive) and this hasn't happened, then it is time to let it go. Time is precious. Your time should be valued by yourself enough not to waste it. If you feel rivalry and it isn't because you are insecure yourself, which would be your own issue, then they are not doing/showing what they need to for the relationship to be a true loving trusting relationship.... |
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How do we win over the competition?
Well you can always do like this one mental bieotch i came across And go around behind the guys back talking CHIT on them And telling redundant LIES Until NO ONE wants anything to do with them ? HAHAHAHAHAHA ! {Not REALLY all that funny though} ((( )))
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I’m still trying to get my relationship thinking cap on right, and I’m hoping the rest of you already might have yours on tight. So… as this is a dating site, where personal connections are made in the midst of the competition that exists, what are we supposed to think, say, and/or do if our partners/significant others makes it clear to us that they respect and will remain friends with the men and/or women that we both know are our rivals, and have acted accordingly towards us, should our partners loyalty to our known rivals be questionable, even actionable, such as being a deal breaker for us? If the amount of time has passed that you feel the relationship should be exclusive (with both of you agreeing on what is exclusive) and this hasn't happened, then it is time to let it go. Time is precious. Your time should be valued by yourself enough not to waste it. If you feel rivalry and it isn't because you are insecure yourself, which would be your own issue, then they are not doing/showing what they need to for the relationship to be a true loving trusting relationship.... I can't agree with you more, willowdraga... thank you for your understanding words...  and I have nothing to be insecure about... this connection wasn't what it seemed to be, or it would have been public knowledge already, especially as it's been more than three months since they first began conversing together... but it's only at the end when he makes any attempt to acknowledge publicly that he had feelings, while in the same breath he cut so deeply that the
wound was meant to last longer than the friendship... we learn by our mistakes and we move on... |
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Well, nothing when your heart is in the right place... and that's the kind of relationship the woman wants too... but I've had a couple girlfriends that had guy friends with this same approach, and they always complained about not feeling really loved by the guys because they don't care enough to set boundaries... and the women want a deeper connection besides just sex and freedom... and they always ended up leaving these guys for other guys that would take their relationships to the next level... just saying... Are these women adults? Are they able to make their own decisions and set their own boundaries? Do they have their own morals and know right from wrong? Do they not know when a man put their happiness above his own? Or do they need a man to show them the right way to live? These women you speak of don't sound very interesting to me. It sounds like they are too stupid to know when a man loves them. I don't want a woman that stays with me because it's what I want from her. I want her to stay with me because it's what she wants. What is the next level up from unconditional love? |
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How do we win over the competition?
Well you can always do like this one mental bieotch i came across And go around behind the guys back talking CHIT on them And telling redundant LIES Until NO ONE wants anything to do with them ? HAHAHAHAHAHA ! {Not REALLY all that funny though} ((( )))
That poor biotch, I wonder why she would go around talking about him behind his back.. she must have learned that from him.. but who's gonna believe a woman who tells lies she can't confirm... yeah, I'd say she's pretty mental too.. if she hangs herself out to dry defenseless... cuz I wouldn't say anything publicly that I didn't have proof to sustain my argument... maybe you should send her my way and I can give her a few pointers about how to protect herself..
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Edited by
KiK2me
on
Sun 03/10/13 01:37 PM
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No surprise here...
Man haters...{Go figure} 
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Well, nothing when your heart is in the right place... and that's the kind of relationship the woman wants too... but I've had a couple girlfriends that had guy friends with this same approach, and they always complained about not feeling really loved by the guys because they don't care enough to set boundaries... and the women want a deeper connection besides just sex and freedom... and they always ended up leaving these guys for other guys that would take their relationships to the next level... just saying... Are these women adults? Are they able to make their own decisions and set their own boundaries? Do they have their own morals and know right from wrong? Do they not know when a man put their happiness above his own? Or do they need a man to show them the right way to live? These women you speak of don't sound very interesting to me. It sounds like they are too stupid to know when a man loves them. I don't want a woman that stays with me because it's what I want from her. I want her to stay with me because it's what she wants. What is the next level up from unconditional love? I completely understand your position, Scoundrel, and I admire your willingness to let a woman grow in her own right... from the way you describe your true depth, is different from the other men I was referring too... they were more like players... who didn't want to claim the women because they wanted to have their own freedom to come and go as they pleased... but women who want more commitment than players give won't stay with them long... they move on to a more solid foundation... like what you're describing now... |
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No surprise here...
Man haters...{Go figure}
Man haters... wow.. where did that come from... just because women who have been burned learn how to protect themselves, doesn't mean they hate men.. they're just wiser for their experiences... 
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You seem really angry about this Athena. Yeah, I read stuff you've posted about this guy before in other threads you made and I found it a bit hard to tell if there really was a particular guy that you liked or if you were just saying that to make the men on here wonder if you were talking about them.
Let me ask you this though, if you don't like your personal afairs being gossiped about why go about it like this? |
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You seem really angry about this Athena. Yeah, I read stuff you've posted about this guy before in other threads you made and I found it a bit hard to tell if there really was a particular guy that you liked or if you were just saying that to make the men on here wonder if you were talking about them. Let me ask you this though, if you don't like your personal afairs being gossiped about why go about it like this? guess I'll have to go back to charm school then huh? If I'm giving off such unruly vibes... and as far as I can recall there has never been any type of public recognition or admission that I am with "this guy" or "this guy" is with me... so, your guess is as good as mine as to the true identity of "this guy" you are referring too... after all, the one I refer to is just a character being discussed in hypothetical terms... thanks for your interest in my work though... you're a real sport for reading and posting your comments when you're not obligated too, but do by your own choice... as for explaining every thread or idea to you now to clarify any confusion you may have... well... you'll have to forgive me, but I just don't have the time to rehash old news with you... have a great evening...
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I don't try to win 'em over. If there is a main squeeze in my life I make sure she knows there is no other woman. Besides, it is hard enough pleasing one person, where do you get the time to please two or more??? They don't have the time to please them all, they are lousy lovers and lousy friends 
Lol what I meant is that if one has to spread his or her time around, then they cannot be their best with any one of them |
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You seem really angry about this Athena. Yeah, I read stuff you've posted about this guy before in other threads you made and I found it a bit hard to tell if there really was a particular guy that you liked or if you were just saying that to make the men on here wonder if you were talking about them. Let me ask you this though, if you don't like your personal afairs being gossiped about why go about it like this? guess I'll have to go back to charm school then huh? If I'm giving off such unruly vibes... and as far as I can recall there has never been any type of public recognition or admission that I am with "this guy" or "this guy" is with me... so, your guess is as good as mine as to the true identity of "this guy" you are referring too... after all, the one I refer to is just a character being discussed in hypothetical terms... thanks for your interest in my work though... you're a real sport for reading and posting your comments when you're not obligated too, but do by your own choice... as for explaining every thread or idea to you now to clarify any confusion you may have... well... you'll have to forgive me, but I just don't have the time to rehash old news with you... have a great evening...
Yeah, don't really have the time either to go through your old posts looking for where you said what and one thing is for sure and that it's not me that you're talking about. But no worries; I don't mind taking the time to read your stuff and replying to it. The way people behave on the internet and the games they play is something that I'm intrested in. I'm pretty sure that there's a PhD thesis there. |
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I don't try to win 'em over. If there is a main squeeze in my life I make sure she knows there is no other woman. Besides, it is hard enough pleasing one person, where do you get the time to please two or more??? They don't have the time to please them all, they are lousy lovers and lousy friends
Lol what I meant is that if one has to spread his or her time around, then they cannot be their best with any one of them 
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You seem really angry about this Athena. Yeah, I read stuff you've posted about this guy before in other threads you made and I found it a bit hard to tell if there really was a particular guy that you liked or if you were just saying that to make the men on here wonder if you were talking about them. Let me ask you this though, if you don't like your personal afairs being gossiped about why go about it like this? guess I'll have to go back to charm school then huh? If I'm giving off such unruly vibes... and as far as I can recall there has never been any type of public recognition or admission that I am with "this guy" or "this guy" is with me... so, your guess is as good as mine as to the true identity of "this guy" you are referring too... after all, the one I refer to is just a character being discussed in hypothetical terms... thanks for your interest in my work though... you're a real sport for reading and posting your comments when you're not obligated too, but do by your own choice... as for explaining every thread or idea to you now to clarify any confusion you may have... well... you'll have to forgive me, but I just don't have the time to rehash old news with you... have a great evening...
Yeah, don't really have the time either to go through your old posts looking for where you said what and one thing is for sure and that it's not me that you're talking about. But no worries; I don't mind taking the time to read your stuff and replying to it. The way people behave on the internet and the games they play is something that I'm intrested in. I'm pretty sure that there's a PhD thesis there. Now why would I talk about you, Tawt... when you've always been here reading and posting to my work... being friendly and open... here I thought we are pals, at least...
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