It's more difficult to find a Christian guy, than a non-Christian guy. I'm not fast, only have one child, but I AM a Christian. I have made mistakes like everyone, but have learned from them and now do what's right. Please tell me how it is easier for me to snag a nice looking guy who loves my son and absolutely adores me but isn't Christian... I end up turning this seemingly perfect person down, wondering why I did.

Looking for a Christian guy that will actually want a relationship with me is like looking for needle in a haystack.Frustrating. My question is this, why is it that less Christian men are attracted to me than
non-Christian men (when they find out I'm a mom)?

I don't think it's wise to enter into a relationship with one who is of a different faith, if your seeking a long term relationship. Those types of relationships usually end up failing, unless one converts to the others faith.

There's plenty of men out there that are truly Christian that will accept your son as their own, and love and treat the both you properly.

Don't fault all men for the short comings and wrongs of others. I think it's too easy for us to hold on to the negative/bad things, and that can end up hurting others.

If you're attracting the wrong type, perhaps you're fishing in the wrong pond, or using the wrong bait? I don't know, just usually seems to be the problem when one isn't finding what they're seeking.

Anyway, welcome and enjoy the forums. I hope you find what you're looking for.

@>-->----

unmin

It's amazing how nice a person can be when they are courting you, and when they are married the real self comes forth.

I've seen a number of cases of the years where people have married outside of the Faith and it has been disastrous. The number of happy endings are definitely the exceptions and not the rule.

It seems that the devil loves tempting believers into situations that would bring sorrow and pain into their life.

Hang in there young lady and put your trust in God to bring the good and Godly man your way.

Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.

Peace to you in Jesus Mighty Name

Elihu

unmin isn't asking how to attract a non-Christian guy. She is asking how to attract a Christian guy. She is under the impression that Christian guys aren't interested in her.

From the look at her profile and her main image, I'd say that plenty of single Christian guys would be interested in her if they could meet her.

I'd speculate that it is her looks that attract non-Christian guys to unmin. The fact that she is a mother who has never married might give such guys the impression that unmin is willing to continue having sex outside of marriage.

Or maybe they just don't want to be involved with the child.

Well, if I were 20 years younger, able-bodied and had a decent job, then I'd be interested in unmin.

That is more likely the case than men thinking she is 'available'. Dont ever lower your standards.unmin! God knows when and who :-)

Yeah, what she said. ;)

Yeah, thanks y'all. I am just bummed that it seems that way. I know God has a plan for me, I guess I'm just kinda young and impatient. I'd rather not have to worry about this kinda stuff

Jesus is in love with you. Well done, you have the love of the Creator of the universe. Could you get better than that?

Unmin says:

"Yeah, thanks y'all. I am just bummed that it seems that way.
I know God has a plan for me, I guess I'm just kinda young and impatient.
I'd rather not have to worry about this kinda stuff"


Umin,
You're having a reality check.
By the time we get to truly know and love Jesus Christ
we will have already experienced a lover or two on the side or rather, on the outside.

Though we've heard this...most of us didn't soak in the "seek ye first the kingdom"...
"and all these things shall be added unto you" concept...
until later...
AFTER having suffered the consequences of not doing so.
And there are scripture verses that you may not have heard yet.

Just know this...
When we are in Jesus, and he in us, there dwells within us a standard.
The standard is His truth and faithfuness.

The flesh is deceitful.
We have to LEARN to "walk after the spirit".

So, His Word is there to remind us:

"This I say then, Walk in the Spirit,
and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.
Galatians 5:16

"For all that is in the world,
the lust of the flesh,
and the lust of the eyes,
and the pride of life,
is not of the Father,
but is of the world."
1John 2:16

"There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man:
but God is faithful,
who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able;
but will with the temptation also make a way to escape,
that ye may be able to bear it."
1Corinthians 10:13

If the wrong type tries to penetrate, red flags do appear.

"...When the enemy shall come in like a flood,
the Spirit of the LORD shall lift up a standard against him."

If he/she runs or resists your standards...let him/her depart.

"Wait on the LORD: be of good courage,
and he shall strengthen thine heart:
wait, I say, on the LORD."
Psa_27:14,


Ladywind7 says:

"Jesus is in love with you. Well done, you have the love of the Creator of the universe.
Could you get better than that?"


P.S. Welcome to Mingle2 Christian Singles, Umin!

Obviously you have to choose wisely when it comes to a relationship,especially when a child is involved,but the thing is,you dont have too! As long as God is in your heart and you put your complete trust in him,he will find the right husband for you and a father for you child.God knows whats in your heart that you long for,and it may take some time for him to yoke you with the right person,but it will never be the wrong person

Honestly, I thought it would be the other way around. As a single christian male in my area, it is next to impossible to find a single christian female my age. I play at two churches and it seems I am about the only person my age that attends, let alone someone my age AND single.

The few times I met someone who claimed that they shared my faith, the moment they found out I wasn't joking about my faith and realized I wasn't using it as an excuse to seem like a nice guy. The moment they realized I was and still am serious about my relationship with God, they ran straight for the hills.

But like you posted in your profile, I also am waiting for God to put that person in my life that I need to be with.

EDIT: Silly me forgot to mention, kids or not, IMHO if you are a man of God, you understand that getting into a relationship is not getting into a relationship with that one person. You are getting into a relationship with that persons FAMILY. The parents, the kids, the siblings, all of it. You cannot pick and choose what parts of the person you want, you need to accept them with EVERYTHING they come with. :)

i'd date you unmin.

unmin...things have their own way of falling into places..just keep the faith and believe that the right one will come on the right time.,meanwhile..live life to the fullest...good luck!

Thank you everyone, your input is encouraging. Hopefully not to just me but anyone else in my similar situation

Sadly I have seen this happen before. Part of it is on you though. If you want true love with someone who loves you and your kid you can't keep shutting down the non christian ones. They aren't bad people just because they don't see things the way you do. Now if they are satanic er whatever then I can see that but Buddhist or Muslim are perfectly fine religions and you can find some very sweet men. Now if you HAVE to find a good christian man....good f**king luck there are very few who follow the way of jesus because it is typical christian arrogance for a lot of people not all of them but a lot ( keep in mind I am a christian ) Where they say they can do whatever as long as they repent on sunday which is BS in my opinion god isnt a get out of jail free card please collect 500.00. I wish there were more people who did follow jesus. To make a long story short I would find a man who loves you and your kid whether they are christian or not. As for your being a mom yes you will have a much harder time finding a man only because a kid means extra time patience more money etc. most guys don't want to walk into that type of relationship I know I personally will never date a woman who has kids. I just don't want that extra weight on me. I do wish you luck in your journey just keep an open mind and faith and you will be fine. I know this may not be what you want to hear I say what other people are to shy to say. Blessing upon you and your kiddo.

2 Corinthians 6:14
14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

1 Corinthians 7:12-16
New International Version (NIV)

12 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?