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| Topic: What is "unconditional" Love? | |
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Edited by
msharmony
on
Fri 09/09/11 05:58 PM
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it depends upon what we define as 'good' reason I think we are inherently SELFISH, dont know if thats good or bad but ultimately, we want to do what is immediately satisfying to us and we would rather not have to think beyond that,,,, When I say good reason, I mean whatever reason they may have, to them it is "good" even if it's not. As for being selfish, I don't see much selfish about making of our lives what want to make it. I think man has made us seem more selfish than we really are quite frankly, especially in religion. thats precisely what I mean by selfish, wanting what WE WANT,,, with focus almost exclusively on ourself and MAYBE our IMMEDIATE surroundings,,, What exactly is the point of being here if we aren't allowed to experience everything we wish to, provided it isn't harming anybody. the point is learning there is some point to not being here by OURSELF,, and learning how to live WITH (and dare I say 'for)Each other instead of just FOR OURSELF because everything we wish to do , even when it doesnt seem to 'harm anybody' in the immediate, can collectively change things and harm things for us in the future,,,, we are too many and too diverse to all just do EVERYTHING we want to do,, too likely some of those things will conflict enough to cause harm even when we had no reason to believe they would when we were only looking at our immediate environment,.,.. |
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it depends upon what we define as 'good' reason I think we are inherently SELFISH, dont know if thats good or bad but ultimately, we want to do what is immediately satisfying to us and we would rather not have to think beyond that,,,, When I say good reason, I mean whatever reason they may have, to them it is "good" even if it's not. As for being selfish, I don't see much selfish about making of our lives what want to make it. I think man has made us seem more selfish than we really are quite frankly, especially in religion. thats precisely what I mean by selfish, wanting what WE WANT,,, with focus almost exclusively on ourself and MAYBE our IMMEDIATE surroundings,,, What exactly is the point of being here if we aren't allowed to experience everything we wish to, provided it isn't harming anybody. the point is learning there is some point to not being here by OURSELF,, and learning how to live WITH (and dare I say 'for)Each other instead of just FOR OURSELF because everything we wish to do , even when it doesnt seem to 'harm anybody' in the immediate, can collectively change things and harm things for us in the future,,,, we are too many and too diverse to all just do EVERYTHING we want to do,, too likely some of those things will conflict enough to cause harm even when we had no reason to believe they would when we were only looking at our immediate environment,.,.. To me it's simple, people need to learn to co-exist. Don't like what someone else does? Fine don't do it, but don't infringe on their right to do it. |
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it depends upon what we define as 'good' reason I think we are inherently SELFISH, dont know if thats good or bad but ultimately, we want to do what is immediately satisfying to us and we would rather not have to think beyond that,,,, When I say good reason, I mean whatever reason they may have, to them it is "good" even if it's not. As for being selfish, I don't see much selfish about making of our lives what want to make it. I think man has made us seem more selfish than we really are quite frankly, especially in religion. thats precisely what I mean by selfish, wanting what WE WANT,,, with focus almost exclusively on ourself and MAYBE our IMMEDIATE surroundings,,, What exactly is the point of being here if we aren't allowed to experience everything we wish to, provided it isn't harming anybody. the point is learning there is some point to not being here by OURSELF,, and learning how to live WITH (and dare I say 'for)Each other instead of just FOR OURSELF because everything we wish to do , even when it doesnt seem to 'harm anybody' in the immediate, can collectively change things and harm things for us in the future,,,, we are too many and too diverse to all just do EVERYTHING we want to do,, too likely some of those things will conflict enough to cause harm even when we had no reason to believe they would when we were only looking at our immediate environment,.,.. To me it's simple, people need to learn to co-exist. Don't like what someone else does? Fine don't do it, but don't infringe on their right to do it. nice theory, but not workable in reality if your 13 year old wants to make out with the fifty year old neighbor who likewise wants to,, do you 'infringe' or should you just not engage in such activity yourself? if your community of neighbors regularly ridicules the neighborhood fat kid,, should you infringe by telling them they shouldnt or should you just not engage in such activity yourself? there are plenty of things that it makes sense to say something or do something about that others do when we dont agree with it, just ignoring it by not partaking in it sounds noble but it helps nothing when there is plenty that needs helping |
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Edited by
Kleisto
on
Fri 09/09/11 06:07 PM
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it depends upon what we define as 'good' reason I think we are inherently SELFISH, dont know if thats good or bad but ultimately, we want to do what is immediately satisfying to us and we would rather not have to think beyond that,,,, When I say good reason, I mean whatever reason they may have, to them it is "good" even if it's not. As for being selfish, I don't see much selfish about making of our lives what want to make it. I think man has made us seem more selfish than we really are quite frankly, especially in religion. thats precisely what I mean by selfish, wanting what WE WANT,,, with focus almost exclusively on ourself and MAYBE our IMMEDIATE surroundings,,, What exactly is the point of being here if we aren't allowed to experience everything we wish to, provided it isn't harming anybody. the point is learning there is some point to not being here by OURSELF,, and learning how to live WITH (and dare I say 'for)Each other instead of just FOR OURSELF because everything we wish to do , even when it doesnt seem to 'harm anybody' in the immediate, can collectively change things and harm things for us in the future,,,, we are too many and too diverse to all just do EVERYTHING we want to do,, too likely some of those things will conflict enough to cause harm even when we had no reason to believe they would when we were only looking at our immediate environment,.,.. To me it's simple, people need to learn to co-exist. Don't like what someone else does? Fine don't do it, but don't infringe on their right to do it. nice theory, but not workable in reality if your 13 year old wants to make out with the fifty year old neighbor who likewise wants to,, do you 'infringe' or should you just not engage in such activity yourself? if your community of neighbors regularly ridicules the neighborhood fat kid,, should you infringe by telling them they shouldnt or should you just not engage in such activity yourself? Shoot me for it if you want to, but in the case of the first if it's consensual hey that's their business. I agree there is a lot that needs helping, but I think there is also a lot of noses being stuck into places they don't belong as well. |
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Do what thou wilt.
Harm no one. Help others if they ask for help. If they don't want help, don't force it on them. 
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Idiotic love. It means that if someone kicks sand in your eyes you will rub it out and continue chasing them with your heart thumping.
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Sat 09/10/11 01:22 AM
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If someone does something to me that makes me angry, (like attack me)-- I will go ahead and get angry at them.
I may even express my anger or defend myself. This does not mean I hate them. It is simply an emotional response. They don't have the right to do that and I will not allow people to tread on me if I can help it. I can separate "love" from emotions because I don't consider love to be an emotion. Emotions are things like anger, sadness, grief, jealousy, fear, happiness, anticipation... etc. Love is not an emotion. Neither is unconditional love. Love between two people who expect to give and receive love between each other is basically a mutual admiration society. It is closer to self love than anything. It is sort of a trade off. You love me and I will love you, and I love you because you love me. Unconditional love does not require a trade off. You just love. |
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Edited by
msharmony
on
Sat 09/10/11 01:26 AM
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love is what I feel, I can feel love for someone even if I dont respect them, but I cant be in a relationship with someone I dont trust
I can feel love for someone with whom I am not safe, but I cant allow them to hurt me just because I love them so, love isnt conditional upon behavior,, but continued support and companionship are,,, I think people confuse the two,, they say 'if you loved me you would...,<fill in the blank>' and they think it means regardless what they do to someone , if the someone 'loves' them they will not change the relationship or walk away from them well, love doesnt have such conditions, so what one does or doesnt do can be seperated from 'love' I can love someone completely, but still love myself enough not to remain where I am being hurt or disrespected,,, |
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Sat 09/10/11 01:45 AM
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For someone to say "If you loved me you would do this or that..." is simply a manipulation tactic.
You should never fall for that. I liked a scene in a T.V. series called Doctor Who. He had an assistant that fell in love with him and she wanted to go with him when it was time for him to leave. She said "Take me with you!" He said, "Why?" She said "Because I love you!" He said something like: "I love you too. I love a lot of people, but I can't drag them all around the universe with me." 
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Finding the eternally beautiful within another.
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That is not to say that one should unconditionally succumb to that which is not good. That is not love, although it can be thought of as such, so to speak.
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For someone to say "If you loved me you would do this or that..." is simply a manipulation tactic. You should never fall for that. This simply does not hold up. Saying... "If you love me, you would consider my person/feelings." ...has no such negative implication(s). |
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in love there is no keeping score
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For someone to say "If you loved me you would do this or that..." is simply a manipulation tactic. You should never fall for that. This simply does not hold up. Saying... "If you love me, you would consider my person/feelings." ...has no such negative implication(s). It CAN be used to manipulate though. Religion uses God like that, to shame us. IE: "If you love God you will consider Him in whatever you do", making you feel bad if you do something "sinful". Can work the same with people too. |
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For someone to say "If you loved me you would do this or that..." is simply a manipulation tactic. You should never fall for that. This simply does not hold up. Saying... "If you love me, you would consider my person/feelings." ...has no such negative implication(s). I doubt 'consider my feelings' was what the poster had in mind finishing that sentence of course, love dictates we consider others feelings, but it doesnt require us to ignore our own so if someone says, if you loved me you would stick with me NO MATTER HOW I MAKE YOU FEEL... that someone is not considering or caring about YOUR feelings and such a definition of love is seriously flawed,,,, |
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For someone to say "If you loved me you would do this or that..." is simply a manipulation tactic. You should never fall for that. I liked a scene in a T.V. series called Doctor Who. He had an assistant that fell in love with him and she wanted to go with him when it was time for him to leave. She said "Take me with you!" He said, "Why?" She said "Because I love you!" He said something like: "I love you too. I love a lot of people, but I can't drag them all around the universe with me." Doctor Who is really cool. And yes, if you truly love someone set them free. Dragging them around the universe with you will only result in eventual divorce.
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For someone to say "If you loved me you would do this or that..." is simply a manipulation tactic. You should never fall for that. I liked a scene in a T.V. series called Doctor Who. He had an assistant that fell in love with him and she wanted to go with him when it was time for him to leave. She said "Take me with you!" He said, "Why?" She said "Because I love you!" He said something like: "I love you too. I love a lot of people, but I can't drag them all around the universe with me." Doctor Who is really cool. And yes, if you truly love someone set them free. Dragging them around the universe with you will only result in eventual divorce. I love you like that.  But I won't drag you around the universe with me. 
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ok, comming in late to this conversation.
First, Love is not an emotion, or a feeling. Yes, you can get emotional over love, and you can feel loved, but love is not an emotion or a feeling. Love is an action! And, Unconditional love is the most selfless act of all. It is loving another and asking nothing in return. Ex.(A mothers love for her baby) It is loving a person even though they want another, and wanting the best for them even though it is not with you. Hard to do? It is a choice..... |
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ok, comming in late to this conversation. First, Love is not an emotion, or a feeling. Yes, you can get emotional over love, and you can feel loved, but love is not an emotion or a feeling. Love is an action! And, Unconditional love is the most selfless act of all. It is loving another and asking nothing in return. Ex.(A mothers love for her baby) It is loving a person even though they want another, and wanting the best for them even though it is not with you. Hard to do? It is a choice.....  Yep, you got it!!
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