yeah ive been trying that for past couple months stopped going der bout 4 months ago, his house is always too busy, we both live at home as the current recession is extremly bad ere in Ireland, so thats what crappy about it even more.

^That esplain much.^

I don't know what to say. Perhaps he is thinking he can't make it in the recession and needs to stay close?

stay close to who?

at this stage, he is making me wanna move to oz. no joke.

Hmmm not sure that you can ever d3eal with this.

Basically family's like this stick together no matter what, you cannot seperate the son from the family its pretty much a part of him..

I have a family the same, they are a part of me, the same as my children are.. My children bring everyone home here, my daughter and her boyfrind are here all the time, if they want to camp over night they do, we are a part of their lives and they are a part of ours, my parents live in my building and my children are split between their home and mine as its all one.

Will I feel sorry for my childrens partners, yep for sure if they dont become a part of the family but at the moment all their friends call me mum and fit in with us. We really dont know any other way, some family's are just one big blob that sticks together and spends time with each other even if its just for an hour, we drop in unannounced stay for meals or camp over.

maybe you should just see if you can enjoy being a part of his family, but let him know that you would like to have your own time as well

u been sarcastic?

Stay close to family. See above post for a good explanation.

Dump him, problem solved...Glad to help.

yeah to be honest its actually like that, its just i feel exhaused when im there and akward at same time...

were only going out a year, were not married... so been there all the time is over whelming.

explain?

Generally, when something isn't working out for someone of importance (in this case, you) the person involved leaves the volatile situation...However, for the most part people are not this logical or aware, so they stay with the volatile situation for years thinking "oh, it will change when..." whatever happens, whatever never happens. Two miserable people are no better than the one who was miserable in the first place, if a situation does not feel right, or you are uncomfortable in any way with a situation...Leave the situation before it kills you.

Generally, when something isn't working out for someone of importance (in this case, you) the person involved leaves the volatile situation...However, for the most part people are not this logical or aware, so they stay with the volatile situation for years thinking "oh, it will change when..." whatever happens, whatever never happens. Two miserable people are no better than the one who was miserable in the first place, if a situation does not feel right, or you are uncomfortable in any way with a situation...Leave the situation before it kills you.


yeah u av a valid point indeed, are u speaking from experience?

any other ideas?

I have a father, just the same as his father.

He needs to tell his father to grow up. He is no longer a boy, he is a man!

just an affirmation of what fearandloathing told you. Some people are born whiners (his father).

Blood is thicker than water and if you are unhappy now you shouldn't consider marrying him. As stated previously this will only stay with you, it is as it is, and you will be unhappily married.

Maybe you really should rethink and move on, it is hard and not right to split families. He would resent you for that. You seem nice looking, didn't read your profile, but at 27 you have plenty of time to choose a future partner.

Leave him, for his sake.
Then he can find someone who can
appreciate a close-knit family.
Or love him anyway.

If my issue has come across that i am immature i am far from it. I deeply love him but i guess im the oldest in my family and he is the last in his so i do not have that attachment stigma that a last child would.

y is everyones only solution (break up)

finally some one who really understands the situation at hand. how do u deal with it?