Iv been single since i broke with my ex a year and a half ago and its not like i dont want a relationship coz i do its just since my last one ended i lost all my self confidance and a part of my heart, I duno what to do anymore i wana date again but as soon as i get close i go all shy and push people away :(

Well... stop it.

That sounds tough, truly... quit pushing... just a simple advice.
But I think you'll find a bit of self-confidence by just interacting with regular peeps...
then that might grow into something bigger.

Just breathe baby...

if only it was that simple, and im not the best with people i can intercat well but to an extent in which i limit what emotions i share and i dont know how to drop my guard

I don't think there's anything anyone can say here.

Not being insecure and jaded is something you're just gonna have to figure out by yourself. But, keep in mind it's all psychological, so... mind over matter = Stop it.

Ya gotta get ya head out the bit of foliage!

We learn these things over time... mistakes are common and should be expected even.
Please don't labor in those things... pain and even embarrassment is common to us all.

Inbetween those times... find some time to rethink your points of view... compare them with other peoples' points of view.

The lonely days and nights are yours alone... but Mingle has some value, still.
Chat, breathe... you will survive this. I promise.

Just go out and start chatting people up. No expectations, just have fun. Talk to as many people as you can every day. Set a goal of 10 for example and stick to it.

Do that for a month and you'll have several options for dating I'm sure.

It is soooo important to work on yourself but do know that sometimes its a good thing to be single. I know how it is, it can be lonely at times. Hell I have a son and Im still lonely sometimes but believe me its much better than having your heart broken. You don't want to just jump into a relationship with a guy just because you're lonely that is the worst thing to do. You have to see what kind of guys want a long term relationship and get to know the person first. Guys really do show their true colors after 3 or 4 months, you see the real person come out. I've experienced this first-hand trust me. Take your time sometimes the guy of your dreams takes a long long time to get to you. Dont rush it with whoever you end up with.

Perhabs we understand your fear,the reasonyou push people away.you are in a save familiar place being alone,accepting someone close to you will put you in a vulnrble position where u could get hurt.change involve risktaking the reward could be mr wonderful that wil treat you like a princes and love you forever. Trust your intuision listen to your heart you wil knowhen you finaly meet someone that wont hurt you.

i know how ya feel! i'm sick of being single too, lonely, and frustrated. i take things out on ppl because of my unhappiness. so i know what it's like. i even got two sons, and that ain't getn it, cause they be cutn up terrible, that don't help.

so just know, u are not by urself in this!

You aren't the only one with this problem.

But, usually what I do, is that I try to make conversation, see if I have anything in common with someone who catches my eye. I like to build up from a friendship, and I've been single, out of serious relationships since march of last year.

I'm something of an introvert, and honestly, having good friends who will eventually develop into a relationship is as important as the relationship itself.

Another thing you could try is just casually dating, but have it be nothing serious.

But that's my two cents. Good luck!

Lots of great advice here ... I just wanted to add that I know how you feel. The first time a guy tried to chat me up after my divorce, I had a full blown anxiety attack.

I'm looking for friendship at this point; BTW, it's been 5 YEARS since I've been with anyone. However, I'm open to having a relationship down the line with the right person.

I hope things get better. Try to Treat each relationship like you have never been hurt. Trust until given reason not to.

I agree with StillLooking

I second that


Learn to trust yourself to make the right decisions and have the confidence that you can deal with whatever happens!

Excellent advice.