Do you feel that way about women in person as well. If they don't cover up they have self esteem issues?

What about men with no shirts on? Do they also have self esteem issues?

Do you feel that way about women in person as well. If they don't cover up they have self esteem issues?

What about men with no shirts on? Do they also have self esteem issues?

I don't write back to guys who aren't wearing shirts in their pictures.
I wouldn't like to talk to a stranger in person if he wasn't wearing a shirt either.
just awkward.
put clothes on.

No I am not talking about real life. I am talking about a photo on a dating site. There is a big difference to what you wear outside and how you take a photo. There is also a difference between taking a photo with something low cut or taking a photo in that same outfit from a upward angle looking down to show more cleavage.

i feel that way about women in person. women tell us to not look and to get to know them based on what they have between their ears, but then they wear clothes that draw our attention from that which they want us to focus. from what i've seen, they're always compensating for something (ie. being dumb or "heavy" or having 15 kids at home baby sitting one another).
IMO a single woman who wants to be taken seriously by potential suitors should dress more modestly so that she'll have better chances of finding men who'll take the time to get to know her and not just try to sleep with her.
after she finds a man she can dress more sexy. he's a man, he'll still appreciate it.

as for men with their shirts off, if they've got the body that's their prerogative. i'm not looking at them. if i had the body i'd want to show it off. of course for me it would be a symbol of my overcoming my weight struggles.


. . .

Ah. So, because you are unable to look at a women who is showing some skin without losing focus, she should not wear that if she expects you to take her seriously. Got it.

yes, because i'm the only man notices such things. which must mean that all of the women who wear revealing clothing are doing so just for me and just to distract me. and all of the cliche jokes which point out this phenomenon in the countless hollywood movies are only about me and have nothing to do with any other man having a problem focusing around scantily clad women.
most men experience this and any woman who believes that a man is paying attention to her words while half of her bosom is showing is incredibly naive. unless she's talking to a homosexual man who has no interest in her breasts.
i wish women would stop assuming that men have no sexual interest in a woman until she's fully undressed in the bedroom. our minds go there almost initially so why feed that imagery by wearing something revealing.

who would you take more seriously, a woman in a bikini speaking intelligently to a graduating class or a woman in a business suit doing the same? if they're speaking the same message it shouldn't matter right? but who is more credible?
if you want a man to acknowledge you for your mind don't do something that will draw his attention away from it.


. . .

Ah. So, because you are unable to look at a women who is showing some skin without losing focus, she should not wear that if she expects you to take her seriously. Got it.

You're comparing a woman in a bikini giving a speech at a graduation to a woman in a suit doing the same? How many times have you seen a woman in a bikini doing that?

And which women are assuming men have no sexual interest until she is undressed in the bedroom? You're not even making any sense now.

But, if you want your women to dress modestly, make sure you let them know upfront. Though, I'm not sure how well it will go over when you tell them what they should and should not be wearing.

I never said it bothered me. I even said I like cleavage. I just said I get the feeling they are desperate or have low self esteem. It doesn't mean they do I am just describing the feeling I get. You know like when you go on a date and the guy is trying way too hard to be nice because he thinks you may not like him otherwise.

You're comparing a woman in a bikini giving a speech at a graduation to a woman in a suit doing the same? How many times have you seen a woman in a bikini doing that?

And which women are assuming men have no sexual interest until she is undressed in the bedroom? You're not even making any sense now.

But, if you want your women to dress modestly, make sure you let them know upfront. Though, I'm not sure how well it will go over when you tell them what they should and should not be wearing.

if i wore a bikini do you think id attract more people?

=)

My comment was to the other person who didn't like it.

ok, that was an exaggerated illustration, but i have one that is more accurate.
why is it that during the miss america pageant the Q&A is done during the evening wear section and not the swimsuit section? bottom line, nobody is going to be paying attention to what the women are saying while they're running around half naked.
and it would seem that the women who think that men should have no sexual desire for them and should be listening to what they're saying when they're sitting there with their breasts half hanging out of their tops would expect a man to not have any sexual interest until the bedroom. they would expect a man to turn their desire off and on. it can be done, but it's usually the women who do that for us and often through what they say or what they wear.
women and men are wired differently in what creates arousal for them.

i never said that i want my women to dress modestly. i said that if a woman wants a man to take her seriously and appreciate her for her brains she should hold off on the revealing clothing.


. . .

ummmmm...doubt it.....but i dare you to test it out

You're not really using realistic examples. You went from a woman giving a speech in a bikini to the Miss America pageant. These aren't your every day examples.

My suggestion is if you're unable to function properly when talking to a woman who shows a little skin, stay away from women who don't dress modestly enough for you. Other than that? Stop telling women what to wear and not wear.

That being said, I wear what I want because I want to. Not because some guy tells me what I should be wearing.

if i wore a bikini do you think id attract more people?

=)

Don't mind seeing them either.
They just don't make a difference :-)