I'm not a person that likes to talk about serious matters much. My friends and family always come to me with thier problems and seeking advice (like I know anything). So I don't bother anyone with my problems (they have enough of thier own). So I thought I'd unload on all you Lucky JSH ppl since I can always just hit delete and never see any of you again without feeling wierd.


With that being said;

Has anyone ever been with anyone that commited suicide or attempted it? Looking for someone that I can really relate to on this.

My experience goes...

I was married with children,house,dog,etc. We had our problems like most couples but always worked them out like adults. It never seemed like things were really that bad. She did become depressed at times and was taking meds for this. Her father had commited suicide a couple of years back and she was close with him. I know it was hard on her.

One day I come home from work and she is getting ready to leave for the store (That's what she said). Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Then I get a phone call. She is at a local motel and says she just took about a 120 pills and was feeling sick. I hung up called an ambulance and flew to the motel. I called her on the way and she seemed calm asking me to cancel the ambulance and just bring her home (I didn't cancel the ambulance). They took her to the local hosptal where I waited for a over an hour before anyone came to talk to me.

The Doctor finally met with me and said she took a lot pills and it was in her system even after they pumped her stomach. He said she might not make it. That just floored me. I was able to see her and she looked bad. She was tied down because the medicine made her violent. Her face and skin were yellow. Terrible sight.

She did recover and we ended up seperating. She didn't want to be married anymore and I just couldn't deal with what she tried to do. I felt so guilty thinking that I could have noticed this coming and could have done something about it.

I still have nightmares about the hopital from time to time. An experiece I never want to go thru again. I think this affects my dating life now. If a women says she has thought about suicide that's the end of that relationship. I don't want to go thru that ever again. Has anyone out there had an experience like this and if so how did you cope with it?

Hi mike, I had a best friend who was really depressed and i use to try to talk with her. Eventually as i thought i was getting through to her i would see her around and see the scars on her wrists and i would just shake my head. A little while later we became more distant she didn't want to talk to anyone anymore and believe me i tried to talk with her i was so worried we were best friends since kindergarten. This was last year i got a phone call from one of my friends and said kayla hung herself. I just was shocked and so upset. I never would have thought it was going to come to that. I blamed myself for a long time and still feel guilty i felt i could have done more

I'm so sorry Alanna. My ex didn't die from what she tried to do but she did in my eyes. She just wasn't the same person at all. Again, sorry for your loss. I just don't understand it all.

i know mike sometimes i guess people just lose themselves in a way. Like it's not the same thing i know but my father was deathly sick in a coma for over a months and in the hospital for 5 monthes he came out and he was just so different he wasn't the same man i knew before. It's like they die inside in a way he became quiet and almost dull I'm sorry to hear about your wife mike i know it must be hard to watch that happen to someone ~Alanna

Mike, I had a hunting partner, named Junior. One year we went out hunting early in the morning, and by the time we got back to his house it was dark. He was living with a woman and had 2 kids with her. When we arrived at his place that night, we walked in to find her and the kids gone, along with most of her and the kids belongings. He started crying because he really loved them, and now they were gone. I called another friend that knew us both, and asked him if he knew what was going on. While I was talking to him, Junior sat on the couch and had put his shotgun under his chin, with the stock between his feet. I turned around just in time to see him reaching for the trigger, and grabbed the barrel out from under his chin to the side. Fortunately it did not go off, but I stayed with him through the night and talked it over with him. A few years later he came by and thanked me for it, he had gotten married to a real good woman, was still in touch with his kids, and the guy that his ex g/f had left him for and they got married... well, they were divorced. It all just worked out for Junior, and we still call and talk about the good times to this day.

wow dave u saved his life .

Good thing you were ther Dave. I'm glad to hear he was able to get his life back on track too.

Dave is a hero nice job ~Alanna

Alanna, I think your right people just lose themselves somtimes.

It is very difficult for sure. Not sure what to tell you. You can only do what you can. We found this out with my father in law. He talked about it, had tried it once before, so when he began speaking of it a second time we knew we had to try to help. We couldn't. He put a pistol in his mouth and pulled the trigger. I did date another widower once whose wife had killed herself. Leaves one feeling pretty helpless for sure. We don't live in a vacuum, what we do does affect others...but in the end, you can only do so much. I'm sorry for what you went thru.

MIKE...

Here's my story......

I was married just 2 years and 2 months when my husband tried to commit suicide. He had a DR's appointment and when he took off his shirt he had cut marks made from razor blades on his chest and wrists. The DR suggest that I take him to the psych ward of a local hospital. The attending psychiatrist admitted him for observation. He had tried to commit suicide a number of times at that point that I was not aware of. Talk about being blind...I never knew that anything was wrong with him, he showed "no signs" to me.

According to the psychiatrist he was OBSESSED with death and dying. They had to put him on heave duty anti-depressants but that did not help. He had to get electro-shock treatments, the drugs were not working. He was in the hospital for as long as out insurance would allow him to be there, one month. He was then released and sent home with no supervision. I had to go to work, he wasn't. A few days after he was home he tried to take an overdose of pills...back to the hospital again....another set of electro-shock treatments. This time back in the hospital for another month. They decided when that was over he was not going to sit all day at home with nothing to do. He was put in a day treatment program. The bottom line was he wound up being bi-polar and now almost 30 years later is taking his meds every day and see his psychiatrist every month. I still talk to him, but we hae not been together for a long time.

Do not be so hard on yourself that you didn't see any signs of her disability....they (spouses) only let you see what they want you to see. Her call to you was a CRY for help, so sad.....

I'm sorry that you have a hard time dealing with it. I personally had to go into therapy to talk things out, I wound up in the end of our marriage being very resentful and hurt becasue I just expected so much more from him that he was clearly not able to give me..........

I know all about this subject. My husband of 7 years committed suicide back in June 1986.

Auburngirl, Your right we don't live in a vaccum. There are so many people that each of us affect everday without even knowing it.


Puffins, You hit it on the nail for me.

"I wound up in the end of our marriage being very resentful and hurt becasue I just expected so much more from him that he was clearly not able to give me.......... "

Thats exactly how I felt.

Greyhound I'm sorry to hear that. Are you O.K. now?

This is a subject that I don't talk about much, but to help you know others are out there that have loved ones that have been, are or were depressed might give you some solice.
My best friend shot himself in front of me in 2004. He did not let on he was going to do this to me or anything. I was in the process of moving the only clue I got was he mentioned that day, he was afraid he would never see me again. I had replied I would always stop by and visit. We had been friends for over 30 years.
That evening he was sleeping on my couch, he woke me up and talked to me awhile, although he seemed depressed that I was moving, I had no idea what would happen the next minute. I got up to get a drink in the kitchen, looked up from the sink just in time to see him shoot himself in the head on my couch.
Needless to say, I lost my best friend I have ever had, and still miss him to this day.
I wish too, that I would have seen some sign, but a therapist helped me to understand some people don't want to die alone. And that he chose to die with his best friend. This gives me no solice but perhaps it did him.
I don't know why people become this depressed and when they do anyone around them should seek help for them. But I do know as a person that lives on I remember him fondly and the great times we shared as friends. Even when someone decides to take thier own life they need to be loved even in thier death. Jade

I also don't like to talk about this
I was not dating this person or anything like that
But she was a great friend to me
Such a loving person too
She went out of her way to help anyone no matter what
One night I got a call
She had shot herself in her living room
For what reason still to this day noone knows
NOt a drinker
Didn't do drugs
Kind as a kitten
And worst of all left a 3 year old daughter behind whom which had to walk around the hospital for 4 hours crying asking where her mommy was and no one felt the need to comfort her at all

Thank you Jade. I don't know what to say. I am so, so Sorry.

MIKE....

I expected so much more from him. When we decided to have a baby we both discussed it and decided that I was going to take a year leave for maternity to be with my son. Jonathan was less than 3 months old when my husband came home and told me that he quit his job. I went back to work the following week. He took a few months off before deciding to look for work again. When my second son was born, I took off for 6 weeks before going back to work. I expected him to be the MAN in the relationship. I was the one with the GOOD job and became the bread winner, Tony became my MR. MOM. I would come home from work and not even talk to him. I was afraid that something that I would say would set off his depression AGAIN. I walked on eggshells most of my married life with him. We lived like brother/sister, I resented him so much I didn't want him to touch me...forget about any intimacy at all. He agravated me just the thought of him kissing me. I couldn't stay in a non-loving, non-sexual relationship, I just couldn't. I needed to be on my own...for my own sanity. Does that make any sense to you?

It is very important to take seriously anyone contemplating suicide. I knew a man who tried and failed...everyone said, 'if he really wanted to, he wouldn't failed'. A short time later he put the barrel of a shotgun in his mouth and succeeded in killing himself.

We used to say one has to be crazy to commit suicide, not so.
But one seriously thinking about it needs help. I think that there is a suicide hotline that one can call for help?

I understand Puffins. The person I was in Love with was no longer there. It was like someone else moved in,