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Topic: Rejected Because of Her Race
unsure's photo
Sun 09/05/10 01:30 PM

I will be honest here. I don't look at "race" as a determinate to who I will date. I say this even with the knowledge that if I did bring an African American, Latino or Asian woman to meet my family that I would be judged by some of my family members. On the outside, they will voice no objections to dating someone of a different color. But if the scenario did happen, I know it would cause problems. Still, this is my life we are talking about here. And whomever it is that makes me happy is the most important thing.



I agree with you Goofball, my family wouldn't be happy IF I dated certain races. BUT in the end, my family isn't the one living my life. You would be shocked in the end about how accepting your family would actually be...I ended up dating a Latino Man for about 3 years, my family actually loved him..even my Dad!!
My outlook on the whole race issue is, IF you fall IN love with someone and they treat you good...go for it!!!
I have actually raised my boys that love has no colour so don't worry about who you fall in love with!! SKIN COLOUR DOESN'T MATTER, IT'S THE PERSON!!

Atlantis75's photo
Sun 09/05/10 01:51 PM

I hate to sound so Naive. But i had asked a question on another post about rejection. And it just thru me back that a young 19 year old Caucasian Woman, said She hates when she gets rejected because of her race. *Pertaining to dating.* What am i missing? Why am i surprised at her statement?


Racial preferences will never go away. If it's not white vs. black, than its olive skin versus frickle white, or dark brown versus light brown.

She should move on, find others to date, I strongly doubt everyone rejects her, regardless of skin.

msharmony's photo
Sun 09/05/10 01:55 PM


I hate to sound so Naive. But i had asked a question on another post about rejection. And it just thru me back that a young 19 year old Caucasian Woman, said She hates when she gets rejected because of her race. *Pertaining to dating.* What am i missing? Why am i surprised at her statement?


Racial preferences will never go away. If it's not white vs. black, than its olive skin versus frickle white, or dark brown versus light brown.

She should move on, find others to date, I strongly doubt everyone rejects her, regardless of skin.




amen, not only that but alot of times people are SCARED of that which they are not familiar,,,,,,some of the 'non black' men I have dated have shared with me that their first interracial experience only happened because the female approached them

people assume that other races wont be interested and so they dont approach them and others are just not interested in rocking the boat of their family tradition(in those families where interracial is tabu)

Atlantis75's photo
Sun 09/05/10 02:01 PM



I hate to sound so Naive. But i had asked a question on another post about rejection. And it just thru me back that a young 19 year old Caucasian Woman, said She hates when she gets rejected because of her race. *Pertaining to dating.* What am i missing? Why am i surprised at her statement?


Racial preferences will never go away. If it's not white vs. black, than its olive skin versus frickle white, or dark brown versus light brown.

She should move on, find others to date, I strongly doubt everyone rejects her, regardless of skin.




amen, not only that but alot of times people are SCARED of that which they are not familiar,,,,,,some of the 'non black' men I have dated have shared with me that their first interracial experience only happened because the female approached them

people assume that other races wont be interested and so they dont approach them and others are just not interested in rocking the boat of their family tradition(in those families where interracial is tabu)


It's the other way around too. Many with certain race and color will not even attempt to approach someone else with a different race, unless the other gives off a strong signal, but even then he or she remains suspicious. I have dated an Indian girl who refused to hold my hand in public. After many years she finally told me, that it's not because that she was shy, but because she doesn't want to be seen dating a "white guy", and peer pressure from other Indians (from India), they would start rumors etc.. Basically she cared more about public opinion than my opinion, no wonder we are not together anymore.

ChangeofHeart's photo
Sun 09/05/10 02:29 PM
Edited by ChangeofHeart on Sun 09/05/10 02:31 PM



I hate to sound so Naive. But i had asked a question on another post about rejection. And it just thru me back that a young 19 year old Caucasian Woman, said She hates when she gets rejected because of her race. *Pertaining to dating.* What am i missing? Why am i surprised at her statement?


Racial preferences will never go away. If it's not white vs. black, than its olive skin versus frickle white, or dark brown versus light brown.

She should move on, find others to date, I strongly doubt everyone rejects her, regardless of skin.



amen, not only that but alot of times people are SCARED of that which they are not familiar,,,,,,some of the 'non black' men I have dated have shared with me that their first interracial experience only happened because the female approached them

people assume that other races wont be interested and so they dont approach them and others are just not interested in rocking the boat of their family tradition(in those families where interracial is tabu)
Eventhough i am open to dating any race, i have not asked anyone other than my own race to date. And it is only because of fear, and rejection.

Dodo_David's photo
Sun 09/05/10 06:39 PM
If it is an act of racism for a white woman to reject a black man because of his race, then is it an act of racism for a black woman to reject a white man because of his race?

Where I am from, it is quite common for white women to date black men, but you never see the opposite. To a white man, an attractive woman is an attractive woman no matter what her skin color happens to be. To him the ideal woman can have any skin color. I am just waiting for black women in general to believe the same thing about the ideal man, but I am not holding my breath.

I will side with anyone who complains about racism in dating. Dr. King dreamed of all people being judged by their character, not by their skin color. Dr. King's dream will not be completely fulfilled until skin color is no longer an issue when it comes to dating.

[Personal Note: I am registered on a website for interracial dating called "AfroRomance". I walk my talk.]

Dragoness's photo
Sun 09/05/10 06:44 PM
Having dated other races, there are stygmas in all races about crossing the racial barrier in dating. It can be familial or cultural.

So no race is exempt from this stupid prejudice that still exists.

no photo
Sun 09/05/10 06:45 PM

If it is an act of racism for a white woman to reject a black man because of his race, then is it an act of racism for a black woman to reject a white man because of his race?

Where I am from, it is quite common for white women to date black men, but you never see the opposite. To a white man, an attractive woman is an attractive woman no matter what her skin color happens to be. To him the ideal woman can have any skin color. I am just waiting for black women in general to believe the same thing about the ideal man, but I am not holding my breath.

I will side with anyone who complains about racism in dating. Dr. King dreamed of all people being judged by their character, not by their skin color. Dr. King's dream will not be completely fulfilled until skin color is no longer an issue when it comes to dating.

[Personal Note: I am registered on a website for interracial dating called "AfroRomance". I walk my talk.]


Visit NYC, and you will see an African American woman dating/married to a Caucasian man, and we have everything in between.

IMO: Sadly, racism will outlasts us all.

Lpdon's photo
Sun 09/05/10 06:46 PM

My 20yr old daughter was recently rejected due to her Race/religion. She and her boyfriend dated for like a year and seem to be very much in love. He was Jewish and in the end he rejected her because she was not. This surprised her as she felt that in today's time predigest could be overcome. She grew up with a father (I raised her) that had no predigest, friends of all race and religions and never judged any body so, this was all she knew. Now she is very aware the predigest is very much alive and it's sad she had to learn in so painful way.



It was probably because she won't convert. I don't think they can marry anyone who isn't jewish. I may be wrong.

I know everyone has their preferance, I know I have mine. With that being said I have dated people from ALL races so that doesn't bother me. I know I wont date someone from different religions and I wont let my daughter either because they treat women like complete crap.

no photo
Sun 09/05/10 10:19 PM

I hate to sound so Naive. But i had asked a question on another post about rejection. And it just thru me back that a young 19 year old Caucasian Woman, said She hates when she gets rejected because of her race. *Pertaining to dating.* What am i missing? Why am i surprised at her statement?


I would assume that the people rejecting her have other preferences.

I mean, everybody seems to have preferences, and they're based on all kinds of different things. Personally, I would not reject someone for being 19 or Caucasian, but I would reject her if she had kids or drank alcohol. So everybody has their own individual standards.

cnybachelor's photo
Tue 09/07/10 09:07 AM
I dated all kinds.. well, almost. I am Deaf so I dated Deaf, Hard of Hearing, and Hearing. I am Caucasian (Italian-Irish American) and I dated Caucasian, Blacks (African-American and a Bahamaiam Black American), Polyasian (Part Japanese, part British Hawaiian), and Mexican Native American. I have dated as tall as six feet and short as 4 feet 7. I am 5 feet 3. I dated real skinny boney type and large as well.

I also dated a hot model and a pretty model and I also dated one of uglist too.

I am blind in every section there is.

I tend to prefer to date someone who is of different race. I felt I am attracted to that. And doesnt matter she is Deaf or Hearing however I felt better with Hearing since my attitude and personality is.. more "Hearing". I talk very well and read lips, really. I do not hang with the Deaf. They are the same losers I went to school still around town so that is why I don't bother with them.

I learned that there are 100 different shades of pigaments of skin so there is no true split of races. From Albano to Equator African Dark Black. I am more of Olive II.. that is, with blue eyes, olive skin--medium with a touch of lighter side.

msmyka's photo
Tue 09/07/10 10:57 AM
Hey man to each their own. Rejection tastes the same regardless of how it was served to you.

no photo
Tue 09/07/10 11:04 AM
Edited by Oceanbluze on Tue 09/07/10 11:07 AM
I hit on a guy here who stated in his profile he was looking for LATINAS, so obviously he never responded, I can assume it was because of my race. I suppose to some that is the most important thing.

My -x- of 12 years was black so , no racism here. I was accused of it once though while working at the grocery store by a middle eastern with a towel, who said I mistreated him out of racism, ps. he said I didnt give him his change which I did, then gave him even more change(like 4 bux) then he refused to leave the store because he ASSUMED I was accusing him of lying because of his ethnicity. or MAYBE he is just a scam artist! Rolling back the tape he did get double the change. GASTURD!

TxsGal3333's photo
Tue 09/07/10 02:58 PM
Sounds like to be someone had a preference not to date her color. Hummm soooooooooooo we all have the right to choose who we wish. Just because we like someone there is no guarantee in this world they will like us the same. All I can say is they need to get over it and move on. slaphead

you_dont_know_me's photo
Wed 09/08/10 12:35 PM
PERSONLY I WOULDNT CARE WHAT MY FAMILY OR FRIENDS THOUGHT ITS ABOUT WHAT WOULD MAKE ME HAPPY NOT THEM BEING COLOR BLIND MAKES ME HAPPY

dilia19's photo
Fri 09/17/10 10:59 PM
Edited by dilia19 on Fri 09/17/10 11:00 PM

dilia19's photo
Fri 09/17/10 11:00 PM

I hate to sound so Naive. But i had asked a question on another post about rejection. And it just thru me back that a young 19 year old Caucasian Woman, said She hates when she gets rejected because of her race. *Pertaining to dating.* What am i missing? Why am i surprised at her statement?


umm is this about me?

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