I hear a lot of women say "all the good guys are taken or gay" when what they really mean is "all the GOOD LOOKING guys that look like Brad Pitt are taken or gay".

I am the first to admit I am not the best looking guy. I get so many women contact me on dating websites asking to see my photo and once they do either no contact or a generic "sorry not my type" message.

So why is that ladies? If personality is more important why reject people by their photos alone? If you take the chance you may meet that good guy that is neither taken or gay.

It's about attraction dude. You have to have some sort of attraction to someone to want to get to know them. Men and women always say they want someone with a great personality. And, while that is true, what is also true (and not admitted enough) is the fact that attraction is first and foremost.

Well for me it's more about physical health. I want someone who takes care of himself and strives to be as healthy and fit as he can as I do. I take care of my body, heigiene, and appearance. I also am intelligent and make smart choices. I just want someone compatible :)

totally agree with this! my last ex became so overweight.. in the 6 yrs i was with him he went from 230 to about 300 and was only 5'8.. <very, very muscular though> though he was about 15 lbs overweight when i started dating him.. < because of his build and muscle mass> he was ill then.. sleep apnia... well at 300 well put it this way i counted he would breathe for 33 seconds.< snore im good with that> then stop breathing for the next 60 seconds! was on all kinds of pills.. went on diets and hid his gummy bears and chocolate bars.. would not make a doc appt for his breathing... and he drank a lot! way too much.. he did not want to get healthier!. so to me that is important!

I'm confused as to how someone can say that their own personality is of the highest caliber. Honestly, that isn't for you to judge.

Look at it this way, I bet O.J. thinks he has a killer personality...everyone else just thinks he is a killer.

I happen to think chunky men are hot...and you know what..?

all the good looking BEARS are usually gay....

We all do it, me personally I have dated enough guys to know that you are not going to get all that good stuff in the package you imagined. All the good looking ones are boring, **** in bed or totally stupid. Sex appeal is what I seek, and thats the case for most women. Yet your confidence is your problem not your looks!

If you are being turned down for your looks, change your looks!

I use to weigh 350 lbs. I decided to do something about it in order to be more attractive to women.

And look at me now....still single... Seriously, do a makeover and change what you believe needs to be changed. If I can do it, anyone can! Best of luck to you...

Not true. Although I don't look like Brad Pitt, I know I ain't too ugly and yet I'm not taken. I also know guys who could easily beat Brad Pitt or whoever the new sensation from Hollywood in looks, and yet they are single.

Whatever makes you think of a less than others, is also just in your head.
If you think you got a problem - weight in mos cases - in reality it won't make a difference unless it's really above and beyond, and in those cases, just do something about it (exercise more, change eating habits) and just work on your self confidence.

the thing is most ppl just don't know what they really want

Yogi's gay?!?!?

If you ask me, Boo Boo turned him...

I have a pic up and I don't get a huge number of responses from guys I feel are compatible with me, based on their profiles and pics. Whether its because I smoke or my profile scares the hell out of them I couldn't say. Based on the personality, appearance and status of people I am interested in - I'm going with it's because I smoke. That said - if I want to attract a larger response from my target market - I have to make it more appealing - quit smoking (again).

I'm glad you agree, because it makes sense to me. :)

<<<<< not good looking, not gay.....but very taken by a fellow Mingler!

Not rich either

Why Speed Dating is Compulsory? anyone know this please send me your feedback.

It's really hard to judge someone online! For me personally a huge part of a relationship is personality. We have to really click.

Just from looking at your profile I'd say pick a different photo. I think it's possible that it's not your weight or looks so much as your expression. The photo which you chose is pretty static and has a sort of flat feel to it.

Do you maybe have some friends who can take some decent photos of you in some good lighting? If so, I'd really recommend it. Also, smile! Think of something happy or take some photos sometime when you're really having fun. I personally immediately skip over guys who look too serious or sad.

Most importantly, have confidence in yourself. I don't know you in person so I can't comment too much on this for you specifically, but I know that for me it really turns me off when a guy feels desperate, needy, or shows a lack of confidence in himself. I want a guy who is comfortable in himself so we can have fun without me feeling like he needs my approval.

How about starting a thread and asking that question rather than sidetracking this poor guys thread... It's a good question and those with speed dating experience or knowledge in that area can offer feedback...

Because dating is about looks. You can be perfect on paper but if you don't have the look, men and women alike won't respond. Being a plus-size woman, I know what you mean. It is hard to have someone email you and be interested and then they see what you look like and because of that they stop talking to you. I have had that happen to me many times.