Topic: lex has a point | |
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I find intelligence to be a turn on. A man who can discuss current events and literature. Who has a well formed opinion about things. A gentleman outside the house, and ungentlemanly in the bedroom. I like a strong man who can handle himself as well as me (tall order) Please dont condesend to tell me that I dont know intellect when I see it, or I dont know what im looking for, Or I really only want a Bad guy. I know my heart very well along with what Im looking for and what turns me on. Perhaps there are confused women out there, there are certainly some confused men. However not all of us fall into your stereotype. Once again, I would point out that everything I've mentioned here has been within the parameters of my own experience, and I don't claim to speak for anything or anyone outside of that experience. All I'm saying is I've seen dozens, maybe hundreds, who will post "I'm not like that." But everyone I see in real life IS "like that." Maybe there really are women out there who are NOT "like that." But merely making the claim doesn't convince me. Perhaps you dont mean to stereotype but the OP certainly did. My heads on straight. I have no illusions as to what I want and dont want. Im not confused in the slightest. Perhaps you gentlemen dont recognize a lady who knows her own mind when you see one as your too busy looking for confused chicks. To say that all the women you have met are the same IS stereotyping. I think its a bad case of not seeing the forest for the trees, I also think you guys rip yourselves off by not being openminded as to how women really are. You cant go through life wearing blinders, and complaining that the world is a narrow place. JMO |
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Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
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Perhaps you dont mean to stereotype but the OP certainly did. I can't speak for him. As you didn't include a specific quote in your previous post, I didn't know who your comments were being addressed to. My heads on straight. I have no illusions as to what I want and dont want. Im not confused in the slightest. Perhaps you gentlemen dont recognize a lady who knows her own mind when you see one as your too busy looking for confused chicks. First of all, I'm not actually "looking" for anybody. Again, I can't speak for the OP. Secondly, I'm not sure what you mean by "confused." The ones I've met didn't strike me as "confused" at all -- they simply had a totally monodirectional agenda which allowed for no deviation and was based entirely on biological functions. I'm not at all interested in that, but I don't see it as being "confused" -- I see it as a path they've chosen, for whatever reason, that simply holds no appeal for me. To say that all the women you have met are the same IS stereotyping. Stereotypes exist for a reason. If there weren't at least some minor shred of truth to them -- or at least the perception of such, among some -- they wouldn't have lasted long enough to become stereotypes. That aside, I think there's a bit of a difference between "all women want dumb guys" and "all the women I've been involved with want puppets." I've stated my position, on numerous occasions here, against overgeneralizing -- the threads like "Why do all women lie?" or "Why are all men pigs?" In this instance, however, I can't take the same position. I don't KNOW that all women DON'T want puppets. I HOPE they don't! But as I've seen next to nothing to indicate otherwise, I have to accept that this is one of those cases where a generalization might be accurate. I think its a bad case of not seeing the forest for the trees, I also think you guys rip yourselves off by not being openminded as to how women really are. You cant go through life wearing blinders, and complaining that the world is a narrow place. JMO Re: "how women really are," all I know is what I've seen. I'm very much open to meeting, and getting to know, someone who is different from what I've experienced in the past. I just don't have any reason to believe such a woman exists. |
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women say in their profiles they want an intelligent man,ok but does he have the bad boy image that they pursue or is that the blood,crip thingy.....lol. seriously men who can figure out how to take a satellite to mars using jupiters gravitational pull isn't a turn on then you really do love dr.laura schclessinger This is what I've seen -- they don't want a pathetically hopeless moron who can't unwrap a roll of toilet paper, or something like that -- But when they say they want an "intelligent" man, that doesn't mean "intelligent" in any way I've ever interpreted the word. They want someone who's not egregiously stupid to the point that it will endanger their lives; but they don't want anyone who has his own thoughts, his own mind, his own hopes and dreams and motivations. Because THEY want to be able to TELL him what his hopes and dreams and motivations should be -- they want to lead him around and direct his steps and ensure that he performs the "designated role." I don't see that as "intelligent" at all -- I see that as a puppet, a herd animal. But I don't think it plays well if you say "Looking for obedient puppet" in your profile. Again, I'm speaking strictly from my own experience here. There may be women who don't fit this mold. There may also be an invisible 900-foot-long vibrating mosquito hovering 12 feet over my head. My hunch is that they know, but would rather not have to deal with it -- if it gets in the way of their agenda. The more I think about it, the more I research it, the more it all seems to boil down to simple biology. true Lex it does, quite honestly gainful employment is usually a sign of intelligence also. At least intelliegent enough to realize that it is necessary. Beyond that, women are individuals as far as what type of employment or how much money he makes. Many men are also looking for their woman to have gainful employment these days also. Do it's not one sided. Men also have agendas, Lex. I think it boils down to whether you can tolerate each other's agenda... |
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Perhaps you dont mean to stereotype but the OP certainly did. I can't speak for him. As you didn't include a specific quote in your previous post, I didn't know who your comments were being addressed to. My heads on straight. I have no illusions as to what I want and dont want. Im not confused in the slightest. Perhaps you gentlemen dont recognize a lady who knows her own mind when you see one as your too busy looking for confused chicks. First of all, I'm not actually "looking" for anybody. Again, I can't speak for the OP. Secondly, I'm not sure what you mean by "confused." The ones I've met didn't strike me as "confused" at all -- they simply had a totally monodirectional agenda which allowed for no deviation and was based entirely on biological functions. I'm not at all interested in that, but I don't see it as being "confused" -- I see it as a path they've chosen, for whatever reason, that simply holds no appeal for me. To say that all the women you have met are the same IS stereotyping. Stereotypes exist for a reason. If there weren't at least some minor shred of truth to them -- or at least the perception of such, among some -- they wouldn't have lasted long enough to become stereotypes. That aside, I think there's a bit of a difference between "all women want dumb guys" and "all the women I've been involved with want puppets." I've stated my position, on numerous occasions here, against overgeneralizing -- the threads like "Why do all women lie?" or "Why are all men pigs?" In this instance, however, I can't take the same position. I don't KNOW that all women DON'T want puppets. I HOPE they don't! But as I've seen next to nothing to indicate otherwise, I have to accept that this is one of those cases where a generalization might be accurate. I think its a bad case of not seeing the forest for the trees, I also think you guys rip yourselves off by not being openminded as to how women really are. You cant go through life wearing blinders, and complaining that the world is a narrow place. JMO Re: "how women really are," all I know is what I've seen. I'm very much open to meeting, and getting to know, someone who is different from what I've experienced in the past. I just don't have any reason to believe such a woman exists. |
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Lex always has a point. Most people just don't see it.
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true Lex it does, quite honestly gainful employment is usually a sign of intelligence also. At least intelliegent enough to realize that it is necessary. Beyond that, women are individuals as far as what type of employment or how much money he makes. Many men are also looking for their woman to have gainful employment these days also. Do it's not one sided. Men also have agendas, Lex. I think it boils down to whether you can tolerate each other's agenda... Even before it gets to that point, there needs to be a clear and honest statement/understanding about what that agenda IS. I have no issues with agendas -- we all have them, absolutely. It's the ones who lie about theirs, who claim they DON'T want something that they actually believe they MUST have, simply to get a foot in the door, so to speak. Those are the ones I have issues with. And they're everywhere. Again, in my experience. |
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yes and we didn't have a reason to believe that the earth was round either, until the 17th century. Perhaps you will become a true renaissance man. Lex I consider myself already there. Partly because I refuse to accept things simply on the basis of unfounded claims. Reality is still the default setting. Until I see something/someone that calls my perception of reality into question, I have to stick with the evidence of my observations. |
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I'm very much open to meeting, and getting to know, someone who is different from what I've experienced in the past. I just don't have any reason to believe such a woman exists. yes and we didn't have a reason to believe that the earth was round either, until the 17th century. Perhaps you will become a true renaissance man. Lex I choose to see the hope in Lex's comments. He did not say the woman who is right for him does not exist. He said he has no reason to believe she does. He said he is open to meeting the different woman that he has yet to meet. I may be overly hopeful, or naive, but that is what I read in the post. I also think that we singles all share the same hope since we are on here. Again, maybe Im being naive. I can only suppose what other folks are doin or thinkin. Your interpretation of my post was right on target. I would be very happy to be proven wrong on this. Unfortunately, all those who claimed to be able to do so, did, in fact, end up supporting my original belief. |
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I think there are some fine examples of intelligent women right here in this thread Lex. How is it that you cant see them. You seem to cling instead to the Ive never met one mentality. when you are virtually surrounded. Again, look at the forest around you. BTW Ive noticed the op has dissapeared and isnt here to debate his statements. That just speaks volumes to me.
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Lex always has a point. Most people just don't see it. People prefer not to see things that might make them uncomfortable. |
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I think there are some fine examples of intelligent women right here in this thread Lex. How is it that you cant see them. You seem to cling instead to the Ive never met one mentality. when you are virtually surrounded. Again, look at the forest around you. BTW Ive noticed the op has dissapeared and isnt here to debate his statements. That just speaks volumes to me. First, you have to keep in mind that there is a huge difference between knowing people on line and knowing them in real life. I can't make assessments of people here that would have any applicability in a real-life scenario. Second, the issue of this thread has never been the presence or absence of intelligent women -- I have no doubt there are many on this site -- it's about women wanting intelligent men (or not). One might think that an intelligent woman would want an intelligent guy -- I haven't seen that. As far as people on this site are concerned, the vast majority of them are much too far away for me to pursue anything, regardless. And even the ones I find indisputably intelligent have other delimiters that would preclude anything beyond an on-line friendship. |
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true Lex it does, quite honestly gainful employment is usually a sign of intelligence also. At least intelliegent enough to realize that it is necessary. Beyond that, women are individuals as far as what type of employment or how much money he makes. Many men are also looking for their woman to have gainful employment these days also. Do it's not one sided. Men also have agendas, Lex. I think it boils down to whether you can tolerate each other's agenda... Even before it gets to that point, there needs to be a clear and honest statement/understanding about what that agenda IS. I have no issues with agendas -- we all have them, absolutely. It's the ones who lie about theirs, who claim they DON'T want something that they actually believe they MUST have, simply to get a foot in the door, so to speak. Those are the ones I have issues with. And they're everywhere. Again, in my experience. often we find what it is we seek. many people also feel - and this is not directed to you one way or the other_- but feel that once their foot is in the door the offer changes here & there, or the ante is upped, or things weren't quite as they appeared B4 putting that foot in the door. I know you have said that u r always honest about your intentions & that's great - but not everyone is. I do understand ur point, and I too have had difficulty in finding someone who I am actually attracted to who remains trustworthy. I guess my point is that it is not one sided. Everything I can remember, offhand, that u have said about women, I, as a woman, have seen with men. Men do all of the things ur complaining about. So I see it as more of a human condition than a gender related issue |
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yes and we didn't have a reason to believe that the earth was round either, until the 17th century. Perhaps you will become a true renaissance man. Lex I consider myself already there. Partly because I refuse to accept things simply on the basis of unfounded claims. Reality is still the default setting. Until I see something/someone that calls my perception of reality into question, I have to stick with the evidence of my observations. yes, it is difficult to act outside what we as individuals perceive reality to be. As one who has had sme of the issues you have experienced, I am looking for a different type of man, different approach (mine). not so trusting. it does put up a bit of a wall but I feel if I explain myself most men will understand and hopefully respect my "screening" |
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I'm very much open to meeting, and getting to know, someone who is different from what I've experienced in the past. I just don't have any reason to believe such a woman exists. yes and we didn't have a reason to believe that the earth was round either, until the 17th century. Perhaps you will become a true renaissance man. Lex I choose to see the hope in Lex's comments. He did not say the woman who is right for him does not exist. He said he has no reason to believe she does. He said he is open to meeting the different woman that he has yet to meet. I may be overly hopeful, or naive, but that is what I read in the post. I also think that we singles all share the same hope since we are on here. Again, maybe Im being naive. I can only suppose what other folks are doin or thinkin. he also has no reason to believe she does not since his "reality" can move in either direction - it can happen, or not it's that old half empty/half full cup again |
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Edited by
sweetestgirl11
on
Sun 08/15/10 08:17 AM
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Lex always has a point. Most people just don't see it. |
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Lex always has a point. Most people just don't see it. People prefer not to see things that might make them uncomfortable. It's human nature Dollface. It's divine to not put our expectations on those humans. |
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Lex always has a point. Most people just don't see it. People prefer not to see things that might make them uncomfortable. I am not one of those agreeable say yes to everything types who is going to believe something just because someone else says it's true in "their" experience. But I also do not dismiss the wealth of knowledge in the opnions of another. A true independent thinker, I am. But I think if u are looking to have someone just "agree" with u from a "because I say so" aspect, then are you truly seeking an intelligent woman? |
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I'm very much open to meeting, and getting to know, someone who is different from what I've experienced in the past. I just don't have any reason to believe such a woman exists. yes and we didn't have a reason to believe that the earth was round either, until the 17th century. Perhaps you will become a true renaissance man. Lex I choose to see the hope in Lex's comments. He did not say the woman who is right for him does not exist. He said he has no reason to believe she does. He said he is open to meeting the different woman that he has yet to meet. I may be overly hopeful, or naive, but that is what I read in the post. I also think that we singles all share the same hope since we are on here. Again, maybe Im being naive. I can only suppose what other folks are doin or thinkin. he also has no reason to believe she does not since his "reality" can move in either direction - it can happen, or not it's that old half empty/half full cup again I view it as simple logic. There is a glass full of hope for me. I think we need to take responsibility to at leat some extent for the situations we find ourselves in - not to excuse perpetrators, not at all. I am not talking about cases of extreme victimazation- just to clarify |
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I am not one of those agreeable say yes to everything types who is going to believe something just because someone else says it's true in "their" experience. But I also do not dismiss the wealth of knowledge in the opnions of another. A true independent thinker, I am. But I think if u are looking to have someone just "agree" with u from a "because I say so" aspect, then are you truly seeking an intelligent woman? Why would you even have to ask that? I relish the discussions a good disagreement can generate, and a truly intelligent woman would be able to bring that to the table. Agreement is easy. I'm looking for depth. Well, depth and someone who doesn't feel she needs to deceive in order to get my interest. It has nothing to do with "because I say so." "Because I say so" is inherently limited, and therefore automatically questionable, at least in a hypothetical sense. It has to do with "show me I'm wrong." I'm perfectly OK with being wrong; I've probably been wrong more than most people. But I think I'll be 96 before anybody proves me wrong on this one. |
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