Asking your cousin to go along in your place would be digging a deeper hole.How did you get away with not showing yourself to him on web cam for nearly three years? I hope this experience with you will not put him off online dating (if he doesn't choose you). I hope he has a good sense of humour and is not that shallow that he cannot see beyond the 'lipstic, powder and paint' phase and take you for the intelligent person who held his attention for nigh on three years, good luck.

I know someone who did the very same thing and though her conscience got the better of her and she ended it for the man's sake, it didn't end well. Of course, the guy hated her, but she accepted it because she deserved it for what she did. That "thing" only went on for a few months, so I can't even imagine how your guy would feel because you've led him on a lie for 3 years. Those are 3 years you could never give back, my dear, no matter what sort of rationale you tried to justify your excuses for lying was.

Nobody wants to be made a fool of and you may have just ruined this guy for life. I'm sorry for seeming a bit harsh, but that's the truth of it. Be ready for something ugly, because it will come and you have to take it. You, as someone else put it, dug your own hole with this major fiasco. I can actually understand you and why you did it since that person I knew told me everything, including her reasons for doing so. She did genuinely fell in love with the guy, which is why she decided to come clean.

If his feelings for you really run deep and he can see past all this, then you'll probably have a somewhat happy ending. But if his hurt will be too profound, then he'll probably wish you dead. I do admire you for coming out in the open like this, but it's a little too late, don't you think? The damage has been done and you do owe him the truth, if nothing else.

One thing I can advise you, though. Be sincere in your apology. He may throw it back to your face, but make your amends even if he refuses. I wish you luck, my dear. Sincerely.

Ok firstly, you may not like this, but I will not apologies for being straight with you.

What about all those you call friends here? Not only did you deceive him, but you duped everyone here as well. Every time you logged on pretending to be someone you are not, you perpetuated that lie. That said, look at the responses you are getting…what do they tell you?

They tell me that people are forgiving and not nearly as small-minded as you credit.

You said he could be the one, if he wasn’t so shallow. Well you didn’t really give him the chance to make that decision, did you? Now the whole game has changed because you have not been honest with him, for what, three years? I think you should have come clean with him a long time ago and given him a fair chance. As insecure as you may be, you are dealing with another person here and now he has feelings for you, feelings that were built on top of a foundation of deceit.

You know what gets me even more than all of that? This statement; “(he is way out of my league).” B/S there is no such thing! Looks do NOT define “leagues” Looks do not make a person who they are. Much the same way, what a person does for a living isn’t who they are. There are many more facets to people, such as personality, integrity, humor, compassion just to name a few. When two people have a connection it transcends all else. Monetary and caste boundaries, race, religion…and yes, sometimes even looks. Don’t let your insecurities rule your life. Learn the true value of people and act accordingly. Of course that does require you to be honest from the outset.

Do not send him this thread, that is not an apology, it is avoidance. It could prove embarrassing as well. You need to call him explain everything to him and you need to remove the false pic so that if he chooses to visit the thread, at least he will see that you are sincere in your attempt to rectify a less than desirable circumstance.

Good luck, I hope there is some way you can at least salvage a part of the friendship you have grown over the last three years, but whatever happens, learn from it.

"O what a tangled web we weave, when we practice to decieve" You are now caught in a web of your own making as usually happens with Liars. You need to come clean right now. Its your only shot. How long did you plan to let this go on? But more importantly, I hope you have learned a valuable lesson here. I wish you luck.

Sorry, but 'sympathy' is behind Door Number Two.

Consequences are what'cha get from bad choices.

I don't see how (or why) he'd ever consider trusting you again.

If you lied about something as stupid as a picture, what ELSE would you lie about?

You're toast - but you burnt it all by yourself.

The ultimate irony would be if he was also usin' a fake picture ... talk about 'shallow' ...

Three years is a long time to be talking to soemone. You should confess to him ASAP, no more putting it off. Do it for him. Don't you think he deserves that?

I would have been suspicious if i cammed with a guy for 3 years and he never cammed back a webcam can be bought for $13 so there's no excuse.You need to confess and let this guy move on you lied for 3 years!!!!!!!

Have you ever heard the saying "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"?
How do you know he wouldn't have thought you too be more beautiful than your cousin?
One thing for sure is that your "inner beauty" has been greatly tarnished, especially after three years of deception.
So whoes pic do you have up now?Is it you are your cousin?
If its still your cousin ..than all I can say is good luck.. you will need it.

Hell is the pictures you have up now you, your cousin or just one pulled off the net...........


I'm sorry but if someone did that to me for three years shshsh no way would I be that forgiving...


But...........then there is no way I would talk to any one for three years without seeing them on cam if I was that interested in meeting them..

See that is why I no longer do the long distance thing I want to see them in person within a couple of weeks. That way I can make sure they are who they are and what they look like before investing time into a lie....

I wish you the best of luck but do come clean it is the right thing to do..

I had someone play me several years ago I found out and turned the tables on him. I assure you he was not very happy when it happen to him but in the end I did prove my point........I was the one walking away smiling in the end.

For the woman he thought he was talking to was all he had ever dreamed of... Told him maybe next time he would think twice before he played with someone else feelings..........

The truth

you were an *** for doing what ya did

now youll reap what ya sow


Hmmm

wonder who else is doing it!! I think I know!!! Lol

Be honest with him and good luck, but truthfully, I still think the very first post to this thread says it all, you screwed yourself!

Take a gooood look

I think I know

I could be wrong!!!

Woah! Hold up pople this did not occur on this site. I have no friends here as I barely ever log on here. The fake account was on another site and I only used it one weekend 3years ago when I met this person. I have not ruined his life, trust me he was never devoted to me in that kind of way. We talk alot but he dates and goes out. I have been more of a confidant for him and any romantic feelings for me are a recent development.


Yes my profile here is real who in the world would want to use my pictures in a fake profile.

I've goten away with him not seeing me on a wbcam for 3 years because I was able to take recent pictures whenever he asked. When this began it was just out of boredom. I get ZERO messages on these dating sites I posted her picture and my inbox was full in 5minutes.

I'm assuming from your picture here that you are quite over weight.
and ... that most likely your cousin is fit.

you could stall the meeting for a few months and admit to gaining a lot of weight that you don't seem to stop doing .
start posting new pics that make your cousin over that time morph into you ....

there are lots of photo altering programs that can morph one picture into another.

Hmmm.... would this make anything better? Fix the lie and start over!

Oh. Shouldn't that information have been included IN THE ORIGINAL POST ... ? Looks like what were once nuisances have now become habits. Sorry, WAY too much deception here, kid ... once again - No sympathy. You did this all yourself - but there hasn't been anything put in the 'lessons learned' file.

Oh the tangled webs we weave when we practice to deceive.

Not mine of course.

Webs is used in the fore mentioned saying for a reason.

We will always get caught when we try to deceive.

Now you will have to hurt someone you care about over a silly mind game.

There is a lesson or two to be learned.

If we don't learn the lessons we repeat the mistake until we do.

who knows what will make anything into better or worse ... and what is fix ... generally that means the thing works ... not that it is morally better in any way ...
nobody can predict the future ... you just like the idea of disclosure but the real facts of life as a human are ... we live in a world of lies.
We all lie ... regularly ... it just doesn't seem as big as this lie does to us. but ...

all studies of human nature show that we all lie ... every day.
its part of our survival techniques ... just some people lie to themselves about doing it.

[just thought I'd present an alternative approach to all the other posts ... no real point of getting all moralistic ... its already been done by most of the other posters ]

Posting this here was obviously a mistake. I was really emotional last night but can see things clearly today. I have spoken with him, told the truth and have NOT lost a friend. I had absolutely nothing to be concerned about.

Whatever you all may think I am NOT a bad person and am not in the habit of lying. To the person who called me fat, thanks alot. This is why I used that fake picture (because of people like you). My bored Saturday night 3 years ago turned into a social experiment and what I thought was proven and continues to be proven.

I am no longer in need of further opinions from any of you so admin is welcome to delete, lock or do absolutely nothing to my thread here.

To those of you who were the least bit supportive and understanding, thank you.

Go back and read my original post... I did mention that it wasn't this site.