I just tell the ladies I am emotionally available.

what if someone has been living with an ex for a long time, has kids with them but never got married....do they need to specify that they are out of a LTR? or can they just say 'single'?

Why is it any different if they have had the piece of paper or not?

In the case of someone who is divorced, there are probably legal financial complications. Anyone getting involved with a person who is divorced has the right to know if there is possible financial baggage and/or other implications if they want a future together. Alimony and other martial finances can be quite complicated.

If two people live out of legal wedlock, the only financial issues are most likely child support. Every man or woman, with kids, and not living in the household has to pay for the support of their child. Of course that can be court ordered as well but child support is a given married, divorced or not. The financial responsibilities from a dissolved marriage are total separate from this issue.

I would want to know if a guy was divorced and still had legal issues.

Well said, Melody.

there can be legal complications as well if someone has lived together, chances are if they have been together for long-term they have loans/mortages that are in both parties names.....

Personally I tell people I'm single, sometimes I say divorced, but in all aspects I am single, divorce is final, no legal complications left over, no kids/ no real baggage(except normal from a LTR i suppose), and maybe a predisposition to never get married again, but I know a lot of guys that never want to get married.


I guess I don't see the point in saying divorced right up-front because people tend to automatically think "why" "what went wrong" now if they ask me I'll tell them, when you just say single they evaluate you one who you are at the time, and not what your past character may be like fromt he negative connotation that the word 'divorce' holds.

I've never dated anyone who lacks complications in some respect - legal, financial or otherwise. You have to decide if that person is worth the pain.

If they aren't, I suggest no-strings-attached lovin.' That has always ended well ... starting with Glenn Close in the 80s.

Sans the ceremony, as divorced person is the same as a person who "broke" up with the LTR. To me, they are the same and IF I were to scrutinize a person for having a failed relationship - both categories fit into "fail". I, however, don't focus on a failed relationship; we ALL have them.

I am skeeer'd of guys who are commitment-phobes and who don't want to get married. I am turned on by guys you are comfortable with commitment and making ‘our’ commitment legal. Not being married is an easy out for anyone. Just my .02. I don't expect everyone to agree with me.

I disagree with Melody.

But she probably expected that.

What we have here is ... failure to procreate.

Pretty much!

*eww*

Damn breeders!

Yeah...I mean, so she boiled a bunny. I call that just being economical!

At first I said "divorced" then as time went on I would say "single" because I had nothing to do with him anymore. As the conversation went on I would let the guy that I had been married before but it has been over and we are divorced for "X" amount of years.

One situation that hasn't been addressed here is whether a person is a widow/widower...what should they have said? They are now single too because there is no other spouse/ significant other in the picture.

I'm one of those rare: "Never have, never will" ...

All of my earliest philosophies were the best and have stuck!

This states it really well.
It should be the standard.

I would just say single. It's kind of silly really, why should someone be labeled for the rest of their life because of a previous relationship? I know people who live together who do everything married people do and have kids, but never signed that piece of paper, so they can say single while other people have to say divorced when they go their separate ways?

Doesn't make sense to me.

That line was supposed to be a spin on the famous declaration in "Cool Hand Luke" but I guess it was a reach in that no one picked up on it.

You are always a pragmatist Goof. I respect that immensely.

Actually, I got it.

"Failure to comminicate ..." great line! I just caught up on the procreate thing!

very well then .. I thought I could count on you. Underneath that silky blond mane is an adroit cerebellum affixed to a functional medulla oblongata. Your gray matter Melody, well, errr, matters.

Your other parts are in top form also. Even your nose looks very olfactor-"y."

Hope I spelled all that correctly. I'm working sans-net today.