Damn! Why can't I be sweet and young?

I waited because something clicked in my mind telling me that you'd better be good to this one. So, no I didn't feel I owed it to her, I owed it to myself not to screw around. Friends laughed and called me crazy, wondering how I could be faithful to someone I had only met for a brief two weeks during our year long online courtship?

All I have to say is who's laughing now?

It's going to depend on the two people involved. Best to discuss with each other about your expectations.

Long distance is tough. Not sure I'd try it again, but I'd probably say leave your options open until you actually meet, then go from there.

I would'nt be exclusive without meeting first. I just don't see a point to it and think it's silly.

Now, after meeting, that's another story.

My girlfriend and I had met playing an online game 5 years ago and developed a friendship over the years. No goofy unrealistic expectations.

Once she moved closer to me (by chance) we started to explore other possiblities. Claiming that we were an item before actually meeting in person would have been insulting to either of us, one of the many things I like about her.

we're supposed to be trying to meet people? when did that come about? i didn't get any email stating that.


there's no one local for me and i seem to rub people the wrong way with my bluntness. oh well.


. . .

You aren't SUPPOSED to be doing anything you don't want to do... I just said it probably applies to quite a few people... not everyone and certainly not you if you aren't in this situation

I came here almost a year ago expecting to meet and date men...
I got stood up twice and since then I've expected nothing and that's what I've gotten.

No, I wouldn't be exclusive with one I hadn't met face to face.

oh, i thought i was being my typical underachiever self by not meeting expectations.

i don't treat this site as a dating site. not that i'm opposed to meeting someone from here, i'm just not expecting to.
if i were to connect with someone from here and we were a considerable distance apart, i wouldn't expect or offer exclusivity until after at least one face to face.


. . .

Word

My only expectation here, is to make friends

While it is tempting for the lonely hearts to lay claim to another, it isn't practical. Went through this on a different site. It came with all the drama of jealous ex bf's, planning this that and the other and yet instantly upon meeting it was clearly evident that we were destined to be friends.....(we still are) she even parties with me occasionally, has slept in my bed (I took the couch) and has even just partied with me and my family. She is now happily hooked up with a fine man and I couldn't be happier for her.

The preconcieved notions go right out the window when you actually meet......it is either the love you sought or it is not.

I hear that!

If I was talking to someone who was not local, and I was highly interested in meeting them and seeing what happened, then I would wait until I did meet that person. I wouldn't feel that I "owed" it to that person, but I would (myself) want to wait and meet them.

I agree

I know this is so cliche, but for me personally, I would have to to communicate and get to know the person and take it from there. I have a secret test I do to see if the person is who they say they are and when the red flags show up. These days online dating is getting more and more dangerous, so if you have been talking to someone and think you want to take that step to move out of state, make damn sure you know who and what you are getting yourself into.

I would need to know where things are going before hand. I can however have romantic feelings for a distant person so long as I know we are working for a goal.

Intellectual types never are -- in my experience, anyway....

It depends. If you are planning to meet me, just forget about the other guys.

I don't expect anything from anyone as far as online communicating. That is until we meet and establish that there is real and mutual interest and attraction. I also don't take anything personally either when it comes to ongoing online dialogue or even a first meeting. Some might like me, some might not and vice versa. It might sound calloused, but it is a matter of sorting and sifting until you meet that one whose heart fits inside yours like a glove. I do try to be sincerely kind and honest though to everyone I speak with--as human beings, we all deserve that! If I'm not for someone, then I need to get out of the way so they can meet the one who is.

expectations = disappointments...got busted twice and won't make it thrice