Community > Dating & Relationships

Topic: On her way back home
MelodyGirl Joined Sun 01/25/09 Posts: 9452	Thu 06/03/10 02:33 PM
Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. well. i wont have to worry about it from now on. From now on, if they say they want to be with me. Ok. Come on. But. Pay your own way. And make sure you have your own place to stay. And your own way back home. As long as you pay your way when you fly to see her; fair is fair. As I said in my earlier post, this is the way it should be for the first few visits. I would never stay with a stranger or have a stranger in my house. Independence is always the best answer - and not moving so fast next time! You both made huge mistakes.

lilbug Joined Wed 10/10/07 Posts: 14791	Thu 06/03/10 02:34 PM
Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. well. i wont have to worry about it from now on. From now on, if they say they want to be with me. Ok. Come on. But. Pay your own way. And make sure you have your own place to stay. And your own way back home. Well, now, I have to comment. Why, do they have to absorb all the costs to meet? It's not just a matter of them wanting to be with you, I am assuming you are wanting to be with them as well....finance your own part of that dream. Or better yet...why can't you go to them?

buttons Joined Mon 11/06/06 Posts: 25783	Thu 06/03/10 02:40 PM
my opionion is one "may think" they are interested in a romantic relationship with someone..... again like i always say.. until you meet in person and are around each other for sometime you will never know....

FearandLoathing Joined Fri 12/28/07 Posts: 30121	Thu 06/03/10 02:48 PM
my opionion is one "may think" they are interested in a romantic relationship with someone..... again like i always say.. until you meet in person and are around each other for sometime you will never know.... Well, perhaps. But I really do get attracted to people solely based off personality, so I'm the oddity in that.

imsingle951 Joined Mon 12/01/08 Posts: 1984	Thu 06/03/10 02:49 PM
Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. well. i wont have to worry about it from now on. From now on, if they say they want to be with me. Ok. Come on. But. Pay your own way. And make sure you have your own place to stay. And your own way back home. Well, now, I have to comment. Why, do they have to absorb all the costs to meet? It's not just a matter of them wanting to be with you, I am assuming you are wanting to be with them as well....finance your own part of that dream. Or better yet...why can't you go to them? Last time I went to them. i drove from out here to indiana. As it turned out. all she wanted me out there for was to eat her out for two days. then after she got her fill, She kicked me out. so.i had to drive back to cali, and move in with a friend.

FearandLoathing Joined Fri 12/28/07 Posts: 30121	Thu 06/03/10 02:56 PM
Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. well. i wont have to worry about it from now on. From now on, if they say they want to be with me. Ok. Come on. But. Pay your own way. And make sure you have your own place to stay. And your own way back home. Well, now, I have to comment. Why, do they have to absorb all the costs to meet? It's not just a matter of them wanting to be with you, I am assuming you are wanting to be with them as well....finance your own part of that dream. Or better yet...why can't you go to them? Last time I went to them. i drove from out here to indiana. As it turned out. all she wanted me out there for was to eat her out for two days. then after she got her fill, She kicked me out. so.i had to drive back to cali, and move in with a friend. Sounds like your problem is taking things entirely too fast. That 50/50 thing rears its ugly head again.

MelodyGirl Joined Sun 01/25/09 Posts: 9452	Thu 06/03/10 02:57 PM Edited by MelodyGirl on Thu 06/03/10 02:59 PM
Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. well. i wont have to worry about it from now on. From now on, if they say they want to be with me. Ok. Come on. But. Pay your own way. And make sure you have your own place to stay. And your own way back home. Well, now, I have to comment. Why, do they have to absorb all the costs to meet? It's not just a matter of them wanting to be with you, I am assuming you are wanting to be with them as well....finance your own part of that dream. Or better yet...why can't you go to them? Last time I went to them. i drove from out here to indiana. As it turned out. all she wanted me out there for was to eat her out for two days. then after she got her fill, She kicked me out. so.i had to drive back to cali, and move in with a friend. Um, TMI dude! You're a little rough around the edges I see. Kidding aside - slow the heck down! You are setting yourself up for something bad or you will keep repeating the same insane cycles.

buttons Joined Mon 11/06/06 Posts: 25783	Thu 06/03/10 03:08 PM
when meeting afar... always communicate on who pays for what in the first place.. always make sure there is a two way ticket. so no one is trapped... you or her.

buttons Joined Mon 11/06/06 Posts: 25783	Thu 06/03/10 03:09 PM
my opionion is one "may think" they are interested in a romantic relationship with someone..... again like i always say.. until you meet in person and are around each other for sometime you will never know.... Well, perhaps. But I really do get attracted to people solely based off personality, so I'm the oddity in that. i admit i am as well.. however... you can be attracted to that online, but in person you get to experience that with.. and its not always what you thought it would be..

Fade2Black Joined Mon 10/08/07 Posts: 50752	Thu 06/03/10 03:30 PM
Update on the woman I kicked out yesturday. Right now as im typing this, she is in LA waiting for the bus @ 8:15am. She told me that when she left here, she seeked out a church, and they bought her a bus ticket to get home. I feel better now that i know she is ok. I did toss and turn all night with worry if she was ok , or not. Is this an ongoing topic started in another thread? If so, perhaps you should have posted the update in that topic for those of us who are completely clueless here. I don't have enough information from this thread to adequately comment in the situation. not sure you'll want it once you get it

imsingle951 Joined Mon 12/01/08 Posts: 1984	Thu 06/03/10 04:06 PM
Well. Im starting to feel that out of pure loneliness That im trying to regain and get back what I lost years ago. Thats a woman that truely loved me unconditionally. She was totally dedicated to me. Heart, mind body, and soul. Only woman in my life that truly understood me, put up with my many mood swings. always defended and protected my honor. Stuck with me through all my hardships. Even to the point of when I lost my job causing us to lose all we owned and a place to stay. she stuck with me living in our car for 4 months. A woman that after we finally divorced ( for reasons I wont go into) She waited for 14 years hoping that someday I would return back to her. In those 14 years, she turned down offers for a relationship. always hoping that I would return back to her . and once again marry her. Maybe im trying too hard to find the woman that will be just like her. And to go back to her is a dead issue. She died in 2008. I think about now. We must have had a stronger bond between us than I thought possable.I say that for the fact that as far as I can remember, Around the day she died, I got a real bad ill feeling that something bad had happened to her. And for the past 2 years that feeling never went away. Untill the day I got this pc and looked up death records in the town she lived in. And there it was. When I stared at it in black and white, Could do nothing but cry. And I cried up into the next day. Finally getting through my head, That no, she is irreplacable.

lilbug Joined Wed 10/10/07 Posts: 14791	Thu 06/03/10 04:13 PM
Well. Im starting to feel that out of pure loneliness That im trying to regain and get back what I lost years ago. Thats a woman that truely loved me unconditionally. She was totally dedicated to me. Heart, mind body, and soul. Only woman in my life that truly understood me, put up with my many mood swings. always defended and protected my honor. Stuck with me through all my hardships. Even to the point of when I lost my job causing us to lose all we owned and a place to stay. she stuck with me living in our car for 4 months. A woman that after we finally divorced ( for reasons I wont go into) She waited for 14 years hoping that someday I would return back to her. In those 14 years, she turned down offers for a relationship. always hoping that I would return back to her . and once again marry her. Maybe im trying too hard to find the woman that will be just like her. And to go back to her is a dead issue. She died in 2008. I think about now. We must have had a stronger bond between us than I thought possable.I say that for the fact that as far as I can remember, Around the day she died, I got a real bad ill feeling that something bad had happened to her. And for the past 2 years that feeling never went away. Untill the day I got this pc and looked up death records in the town she lived in. And there it was. When I stared at it in black and white, Could do nothing but cry. And I cried up into the next day. Finally getting through my head, That no, she is irreplacable. Well, bless your heart...I am sorry for the loss. Please don't allow your loneliness and/or desperation to feel once you felt with her to guide your decisions. Folks are right on here, Sl-o-o-o-o-w things down. You most probably will not find what you had with her again, so don't lay that at someone else's door. Take your time, plan things out and when you do meet someone be sure it because you want to meet HER and not chasing a memory.

imsingle951 Joined Mon 12/01/08 Posts: 1984	Thu 06/03/10 04:27 PM
Well. Im starting to feel that out of pure loneliness That im trying to regain and get back what I lost years ago. Thats a woman that truely loved me unconditionally. She was totally dedicated to me. Heart, mind body, and soul. Only woman in my life that truly understood me, put up with my many mood swings. always defended and protected my honor. Stuck with me through all my hardships. Even to the point of when I lost my job causing us to lose all we owned and a place to stay. she stuck with me living in our car for 4 months. A woman that after we finally divorced ( for reasons I wont go into) She waited for 14 years hoping that someday I would return back to her. In those 14 years, she turned down offers for a relationship. always hoping that I would return back to her . and once again marry her. Maybe im trying too hard to find the woman that will be just like her. And to go back to her is a dead issue. She died in 2008. I think about now. We must have had a stronger bond between us than I thought possable.I say that for the fact that as far as I can remember, Around the day she died, I got a real bad ill feeling that something bad had happened to her. And for the past 2 years that feeling never went away. Untill the day I got this pc and looked up death records in the town she lived in. And there it was. When I stared at it in black and white, Could do nothing but cry. And I cried up into the next day. Finally getting through my head, That no, she is irreplacable. Well, bless your heart...I am sorry for the loss. Please don't allow your loneliness and/or desperation to feel once you felt with her to guide your decisions. Folks are right on here, Sl-o-o-o-o-w things down. You most probably will not find what you had with her again, so don't lay that at someone else's door. Take your time, plan things out and when you do meet someone be sure it because you want to meet HER and not chasing a memory. Thank you for that. Very good advice. Just may be time for me to put the life that my ex and I had together in the past and behind me. LOL got to admit that im getting too old to go through the life style that we lived for the 20 years that were married. WOW!!!!! Those were great years. I use many memories from those years as fantasies as In self serving. Think its time i keep them in mty mememory bank instead of trying so dam hard to recapture what her and I once had. NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. Now I must learn how to have a " normal" relationship. Never once in the past 30 years gave that a thought. Hell.May be worth trying.

lilbug Joined Wed 10/10/07 Posts: 14791	Thu 06/03/10 04:34 PM
You're welcome! Thank you sharing such a personal part of your life. I do feel the love you must have felt for her in your words, and I feel the loss you've been carrying with you. Keep your memories, just make some room for some new ones!

imsingle951 Joined Mon 12/01/08 Posts: 1984	Thu 06/03/10 04:43 PM
Yes. I loved her with such a deep love that more than likely I will never pocess again. And Im the type that when I give my heart to someone. Its forever. Just as in the case of this past fiasco. Even though she had deciet on her mind. I still loved her. and she will always be in my heart. and if ever she gets her hed on straight and needs help, or a shoulder to lean on. Yes. I wouldnt hesitate in helping her. I have already forgiven her in my heart. Because when I give my heart. Its TOTALY UNCONDITIONAL.

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Thu 06/03/10 06:16 PM
Well don't feel too great.. In my opinion you should have bought her a roundtrip ticket rather than a one way if you were going to buy the ticket at all... The whole thing was done rather irresponsibly in the first place and it wasn't the churches job to get her home, it was yours and hers... It should have been her job to find her way home. She came out there with less than honest intentions and should not have expected to be taken care of. Im in total agreement. I got a text from her yesturday that she asked me how could I do that to her? Throw her out in the street without knowing anything about the town? i texted her back and told her thet she done it to herself. And also i told her that I was a bit impressed that she had managed to get a chuch around her to buy her a ticket. Any more around here thats unheard of. In the central valley cali we have so many homeless that churches have given up helping ppl. I think that "both" of you should have been more responsible.. I wasn't there so I don't know her complete intentions but you stated that you wanted something serious, she wasn't going for it so you kicked her out.. I get where you were coming from BUT two responsible adults would have discussed things and planned a little better not expecting love and living together after one meeting... I don't believe in just blaming the other b/c we almost always have control on our side and part of the responsibility lies there... Well also what does getting serious right away mean? Did he give her the boot because she expected respect and wouldn't put out? I think the whole thing sounds reprehensible, and I hesitate to absorb criticism of the woman because she is not here to give her side.

singmesweet Joined Mon 07/28/08 Posts: 26661	Thu 06/03/10 08:49 PM
Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. well. i wont have to worry about it from now on. From now on, if they say they want to be with me. Ok. Come on. But. Pay your own way. And make sure you have your own place to stay. And your own way back home. Well, now, I have to comment. Why, do they have to absorb all the costs to meet? It's not just a matter of them wanting to be with you, I am assuming you are wanting to be with them as well....finance your own part of that dream. Or better yet...why can't you go to them? If I were to go see someone (and I have in the past) I would never assume they'd pay for me. Like Melody said earlier, it's best to pay your own way in the beginning.

beauty314 Joined Sat 04/19/08 Posts: 1709	Thu 06/03/10 09:41 PM
Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. well. i wont have to worry about it from now on. From now on, if they say they want to be with me. Ok. Come on. But. Pay your own way. And make sure you have your own place to stay. And your own way back home. Well, now, I have to comment. Why, do they have to absorb all the costs to meet? It's not just a matter of them wanting to be with you, I am assuming you are wanting to be with them as well....finance your own part of that dream. Or better yet...why can't you go to them? Last time I went to them. i drove from out here to indiana. As it turned out. all she wanted me out there for was to eat her out for two days. then after she got her fill, She kicked me out. so.i had to drive back to cali, and move in with a friend. OK ewwwwwww :barfing: After two posts worth of tool, nice guy, tool, sad guy, tool, pity that guy, tool, from now on, tool holy crap where do I sign up

IndnPrncs Joined Sun 11/04/07 Posts: 58420	Fri 06/04/10 12:15 AM
Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. well. i wont have to worry about it from now on. From now on, if they say they want to be with me. Ok. Come on. But. Pay your own way. And make sure you have your own place to stay. And your own way back home. Well, now, I have to comment. Why, do they have to absorb all the costs to meet? It's not just a matter of them wanting to be with you, I am assuming you are wanting to be with them as well....finance your own part of that dream. Or better yet...why can't you go to them? Last time I went to them. i drove from out here to indiana. As it turned out. all she wanted me out there for was to eat her out for two days. then after she got her fill, She kicked me out. so.i had to drive back to cali, and move in with a friend. OK ewwwwwww :barfing: After two posts worth of tool, nice guy, tool, sad guy, tool, pity that guy, tool, from now on, tool holy crap where do I sign up oh to write like you!

denny123 Joined Sun 11/23/08 Posts: 5	Fri 06/04/10 01:54 AM
hello,ive been reading this topic with dismay,i have come to the conclusion that in the usa,if a woman dont put out you boot her out,how sad.