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| Topic: On her way back home | |
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Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I'm just giving my point of view. If I were in a situation where the other person was not who they said they were or wanting something completely different than they led me to believe, I would not allow them to stay. I would also not give them money to get home. They should be responsible enough to be able to do that themselves. If it were as simple as that I might agree with you.. However, it is not.. |
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Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I'm just giving my point of view. If I were in a situation where the other person was not who they said they were or wanting something completely different than they led me to believe, I would not allow them to stay. I would also not give them money to get home. They should be responsible enough to be able to do that themselves. If it were as simple as that I might agree with you.. However, it is not.. See above.. |
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Of course it could have been planned better. But what kind of person goes on a trip like that and doesn't bother to make sure they have enough money to take care of themselves should things not go well? Especially when they're not being honest about what's going on to begin with? Sorry, but I have no sympathy for someone like that. Sympathy or not, using someone or not he brought her to his state wanting something from her.. She didn't give him what he wanted so he got rid of her.. I don't care who you are, if you got them there and didn't like them it's your responsibility to get them home.. Like I said if he was going to buy a ticket he could have bought round trip.. What if he didnt' like her? Would he have put her on the bus to go back home? Just b/c he didn't get "his" needs/wants met is no reason to leave someone on the streets I don't care if she thought she was getting a free ride.. She didn't do anything physcially to him, she didn't tear up his house, she wanted a free ride.. Right or wrong on her part, I wouldn't leave a person in the streets... But then again I wouldn't bring someone to my house with plans of living together and never having spent time with them over a very long period... I'd never expect someone to buy my ticket. I guess I just see it as he didn't have to do it and she should have been prepared to get herself home if it didn't work. Who would go into a situation like that without having a backup plan to leave? And yes, seems that she did want a free ride. Just because she wanted that, he shouldn't have been expected to provide that for her. As an adult, she should have her own money. I wouldn't either but that's not my point... My point is HE WANTED SOMETHING AND DIDN'T GET IT... She was wrong that's a given.. maybe she didn't like him upon seeing him and that's cold and YES she should have had her own money and been able to provide for herself BUT HE OBVIOUSLY KNEW SHE COULDN'T b/c she couldn't even afford a bus ticket.. Right there RED FLAG! I'm sure he knew more about her financial situation before he bought the ticket therefore by buying the one way he obligated himself to take care of her if it didn't work out.... Again I ask "What would he have done if he didn't like her?" Would he be any less responsible for getting her out there? Forget what YOU would have done or what I would have done.. What's RIGHT? Humanely right? Neither of them were right but to leave someone in the streets that is TERRIBLY WRONG!!!!!! If someone wasn't truthful with you and still wanted to stay and have you take care of them, would you let them? Or would you ask them to leave? I think I said a few times "I would buy their ticket back home".... If that's what you'd do, great. I'm not going to argue with you about it, though. |
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Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I'm just giving my point of view. If I were in a situation where the other person was not who they said they were or wanting something completely different than they led me to believe, I would not allow them to stay. I would also not give them money to get home. They should be responsible enough to be able to do that themselves. I guess we're just different in that. Although he had to of known she didn't have any money, and he had to of known that a one-way ticket to see her for the first time was an awful idea. Like I said, is he new to online dating? That may very well be the problem I think, at least given the completly unrealistic expectations of someone coming out on their first meet and they will be together 'forever' based of this first and only meet face to face. |
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If she would have told me that she had no interest in me romanticly, but wanted a place to stay untill she eas able to get a job and a place of her own. Yes. i would have let her stay untill she got enough money built up to get a place and stand on her own two feet. But decieving me in telling me that she wanted a life with me. And that she was inlove with me in order to get a place to stay untill she got her own place, kinda of hurt realy bad, and bust the bubble that I alowed to grow. Not only was I hurt. I was pissed. She had been lying to me for atleast the past two months. Just for her gain. Are you new to online dating? This is a serious question, because from what I'm getting so far between this and the other topic is three different time-frames and one really poor decision. |
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Of course it could have been planned better. But what kind of person goes on a trip like that and doesn't bother to make sure they have enough money to take care of themselves should things not go well? Especially when they're not being honest about what's going on to begin with? Sorry, but I have no sympathy for someone like that. Sympathy or not, using someone or not he brought her to his state wanting something from her.. She didn't give him what he wanted so he got rid of her.. I don't care who you are, if you got them there and didn't like them it's your responsibility to get them home.. Like I said if he was going to buy a ticket he could have bought round trip.. What if he didnt' like her? Would he have put her on the bus to go back home? Just b/c he didn't get "his" needs/wants met is no reason to leave someone on the streets I don't care if she thought she was getting a free ride.. She didn't do anything physcially to him, she didn't tear up his house, she wanted a free ride.. Right or wrong on her part, I wouldn't leave a person in the streets... But then again I wouldn't bring someone to my house with plans of living together and never having spent time with them over a very long period... I'd never expect someone to buy my ticket. I guess I just see it as he didn't have to do it and she should have been prepared to get herself home if it didn't work. Who would go into a situation like that without having a backup plan to leave? And yes, seems that she did want a free ride. Just because she wanted that, he shouldn't have been expected to provide that for her. As an adult, she should have her own money. I wouldn't either but that's not my point... My point is HE WANTED SOMETHING AND DIDN'T GET IT... She was wrong that's a given.. maybe she didn't like him upon seeing him and that's cold and YES she should have had her own money and been able to provide for herself BUT HE OBVIOUSLY KNEW SHE COULDN'T b/c she couldn't even afford a bus ticket.. Right there RED FLAG! I'm sure he knew more about her financial situation before he bought the ticket therefore by buying the one way he obligated himself to take care of her if it didn't work out.... Again I ask "What would he have done if he didn't like her?" Would he be any less responsible for getting her out there? Forget what YOU would have done or what I would have done.. What's RIGHT? Humanely right? Neither of them were right but to leave someone in the streets that is TERRIBLY WRONG!!!!!! If someone wasn't truthful with you and still wanted to stay and have you take care of them, would you let them? Or would you ask them to leave? I think I said a few times "I would buy their ticket back home".... If that's what you'd do, great. I'm not going to argue with you about it, though. That is what I'd do which is all I've been saying... Who said anything about arguing? |
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Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I'm just giving my point of view. If I were in a situation where the other person was not who they said they were or wanting something completely different than they led me to believe, I would not allow them to stay. I would also not give them money to get home. They should be responsible enough to be able to do that themselves. If it were as simple as that I might agree with you.. However, it is not.. See above.. |
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Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I'm just giving my point of view. If I were in a situation where the other person was not who they said they were or wanting something completely different than they led me to believe, I would not allow them to stay. I would also not give them money to get home. They should be responsible enough to be able to do that themselves. If it were as simple as that I might agree with you.. However, it is not.. See above.. That's just swell and where was she to sleep in the mean time? On a park bench? |
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Plus. In the last two days while she has been on the bus going back home. i have making sure that she has been feed and not going hungry. While she has been in lay overs, ive had her contact me with location of where she was and the phone# of the fast food place and I have been letting her get what she wanted to eat and payed for it with my credit card over the phone. That way she wouldnt go hungry. So I am NOT the monster that you make me out to be. I really do have a heart
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Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I'm just giving my point of view. If I were in a situation where the other person was not who they said they were or wanting something completely different than they led me to believe, I would not allow them to stay. I would also not give them money to get home. They should be responsible enough to be able to do that themselves. If it were as simple as that I might agree with you.. However, it is not.. See above.. That's just swell and where was she to sleep in the mean time? On a park bench? |
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Plus. In the last two days while she has been on the bus going back home. i have making sure that she has been feed and not going hungry. While she has been in lay overs, ive had her contact me with location of where she was and the phone# of the fast food place and I have been letting her get what she wanted to eat and payed for it with my credit card over the phone. That way she wouldnt go hungry. So I am NOT the monster that you make me out to be. I really do have a heart I did not say you were a monster.. I did not say she was an upstanding person... I think you were both irresponsible in your actions.. What if she had been raped or killed or both? I wonder if the money spent on food might have gotten her a quicker bus ride though.. |
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Plus. In the last two days while she has been on the bus going back home. i have making sure that she has been feed and not going hungry. While she has been in lay overs, ive had her contact me with location of where she was and the phone# of the fast food place and I have been letting her get what she wanted to eat and payed for it with my credit card over the phone. That way she wouldnt go hungry. So I am NOT the monster that you make me out to be. I really do have a heart I did not say you were a monster.. I did not say she was an upstanding person... I think you were both irresponsible in your actions.. What if she had been raped or killed or both? I wonder if the money spent on food might have gotten her a quicker bus ride though.. |
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Well don't feel too great.. In my opinion you should have bought her a roundtrip ticket rather than a one way if you were going to buy the ticket at all... The whole thing was done rather irresponsibly in the first place and it wasn't the churches job to get her home, it was yours and hers... Couldn't have said it better. (( Joy )) BTW .. I have been all over the country meeting people from online. We ALWAYS share costs .. ie I do plane (always roundtrip) they do hotel or vice versa. 
And I ALWAYS stay in a hotel. Why?  Because ...
I don't give a rat's a** how long you've talked. There is NO way (as you've so eloquently proven here =) to REALLY know someone until you've spent time in person. 
I had ONE guy from NYC who wanted to move AND move in with me before we met in person on a visit first. Cold day in hell before that was gonna happen. He accused me of not trusting him.  WHATEVERRRR
Ended up I dumped him before meeting in person and he married someone else. Ya. Guess who started writing me after the wedding.  Was soooooo disappointed we never met. Could we NOW?
You had TWO years to work out a single visit? This should never ever have ended this way. And she should never ever travel again. At least with out her mommie and daddy. 
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Plus. In the last two days while she has been on the bus going back home. i have making sure that she has been feed and not going hungry. While she has been in lay overs, ive had her contact me with location of where she was and the phone# of the fast food place and I have been letting her get what she wanted to eat and payed for it with my credit card over the phone. That way she wouldnt go hungry. So I am NOT the monster that you make me out to be. I really do have a heart I did not say you were a monster.. I did not say she was an upstanding person... I think you were both irresponsible in your actions.. What if she had been raped or killed or both? I wonder if the money spent on food might have gotten her a quicker bus ride though.. Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL |
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Update on the woman I kicked out yesturday. Right now as im typing this, she is in LA waiting for the bus @ 8:15am. She told me that when she left here, she seeked out a church, and they bought her a bus ticket to get home. I feel better now that i know she is ok. I did toss and turn all night with worry if she was ok , or not. Is this an ongoing topic started in another thread? If so, perhaps you should have posted the update in that topic for those of us who are completely clueless here. I don't have enough information from this thread to adequately comment in the situation. 
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Plus. In the last two days while she has been on the bus going back home. i have making sure that she has been feed and not going hungry. While she has been in lay overs, ive had her contact me with location of where she was and the phone# of the fast food place and I have been letting her get what she wanted to eat and payed for it with my credit card over the phone. That way she wouldnt go hungry. So I am NOT the monster that you make me out to be. I really do have a heart I did not say you were a monster.. I did not say she was an upstanding person... I think you were both irresponsible in your actions.. What if she had been raped or killed or both? I wonder if the money spent on food might have gotten her a quicker bus ride though.. Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL |
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Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. |
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Dang I can fly roundtrip for that. Bus fare isn't what it used to be. LOL No it is'nt. Just for the one way From Cape Girardeau mo. To tulare cali, doing it over the phone, it cost me 245.00 one way. Aint cheap any more You can fly round trip for less than $250 easily! I flew round trip/nonstop to VA from Cali for $228. All it takes is a little research. |
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Ahhh...bitterness.
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