EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!

Breaking news!!!!!! Paris has lost her chiauhua, anybody know the where
abouts, please contact Mach News! Thanks

This Just In! Paris found her dog, it was in her crack! lmao

No way! That means looking up Paris' skirt again and I have made my
feelings on that VERY clear!!!!!!!!!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

((((Shelley)))) yes it was Sorry Mach!

Now an interview with Paris hilton's dog!

where you scared while you were lost?

dog: woof, woof woof, wooo wooo wooof

Did you think for a moment you would never see the light of day again?

Dog: woo woof, woofy woof woof wuufff

While you were lost what was on your mind?

Dog: damn one night in Paris sucks azz!

lmao

NEWS FLASH!!! All the pro atheletes from the UK have boarded her
Majesty's Queen Elizabeth II ocean liner in preparation for the trip to
the U.S. They all figure that if Beckham can make 1 million dollars per
week there, it will be a cinch for them to make just half of that
rate!!

it can't be said enough, mach,
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

To the person calling himself {{{{{{{{{{{{{Mach}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I think
Miss Hilton's chiauhua is in the park playing with my corgis'.


Cheers, Liz

Any sightings of Elvis in the news today?

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Lakeman}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}


I do not recall Britain having any pro
athletes........................look at the Olympics.Hic!

This just in...Mach25 was spotted on video inside Paris Hilton's jail
cell stealing all her underwear...In his attempt to make a quick
escape...The cell door was left open and poor Paris didn't know enough
to escape....BUT Tiny her Chihuahua did...Miss Hilton was last reported
crying her eyes out and had to be sedated!!!!!!!!!!

No sightings of Elvis himself, but, a broken trail of fried peanut
butter and bananas was found leading away from Graceland. The trail was
lost after it entered a park were it was then eaten by a band of roving
alien biker squirrels.
The band of roving alien bikers squirrels was apparently preparing a
park visitor for an anal probe when police showed up and disperesed the
squirrels.
A police spokesman said only one of the band of squirrels has been
captured as of yet, so he warning citezens to stay out the park until
further notice.

We'll have more on this story at 10.

Elvis was spotted! He was spotted under the bridge near his home in
Graceland recieving a hand job from our very own reporter Shelley! Much
more on this story at 11, be sure to tune in! lmao

Yeah and he turned out to be all washed up tooooooooo!!!!!!!!

Is it true that there are Zombies eating my neighbors?

no actually there is no such thing as zombies, what you are seeing is a
bunch of crackheads actually lmao!

tune in at 11 and find out what jashers are saying about frankf! and
also at 11, seems like mariuagna use has upped 35% and 15% of that toll
is online chatters who are pufffing away! See ya at 11!

SSSSSSHHHHHHHHH, mach, you're not supposed to tell!!!!

Now I know who stole my uppers...