From a man...most men are dogs.

Dont act like they aren't.

There are some who will treat a women with class, but not many.

And we can always take the easy way out and blame the victim.

It's easier than having to admit that not everyone starts from the same place with the same opportunities, kinds and amounts of feeling, or that sometimes people seeking romantic attachment can be quite sociopathic in its pursuit.

Nope, the 'It's All Good' banner must be hoisted high and those who falter must be exposed.

-Kerry O.

My question to the OP is: Do you often find yourself on a leash? Dressed in stupid costumes? Fed kibles? Carried in purses? Baby talked to?

If so, then the women you're involving yourself with might be confusing you for a dog. The only reasonable conclusion I can draw from this is that these women are not very intelligent, and therefore not that compatible with you.

Perhaps a different social circle?

Well that's one type of dog but I think he meant the other type of "dawg"...

Everyone has been mistreated in relationships unless they have never had one.

It is always what you do with the wrongs that are done to you. Do you get upset and stay upset the rest of your life? That is an option but it will never take you further than that pain. Do you go through the grieving process which includes anger and all the rest and then look at your responsibility in the situation. Sometimes your responsibility is as basic as not heeding the warning signs when you first met them or not communicating what you wanted and expected well enough for them to understand, etc...

So it is always about our attitude about life that makes us respond better to adversity.

Okay, five pages. Stop chasing tail you can't get, or continue chasing the women that think all men are "dogs." Honestly, you are making a mistake somewhere if all of the women you meet think that men are "dogs," go to another library...bar...or wherever it is that you pick up such classy women.

Law of attraction, quit trying to change them and deal with the fact that yes, some women do indeed think all men are pigs. Here's a tip, the mind is an independent muscle, and yes, some are completly oblivious to the ability to say "oh, not all men are pigs" it happens...much in the same that the all-to-common generalization of "all women think lalala" pops up all the time. 'Nice guys finish last,' remember that for a future thread that will get tore to shreds.

I couldn't agree more.

That's the key, right there.

Sorry, but as good as that sounds written down...it simply isn't true for the most part. A lot of people will use experience as the forefront of what to do when approached with a similiar situation later on down the road, what worked last time, how did I do it, what did I say, etc.

It looks good on paper though.

Sure, but as I said, all things are not equal-- the mistreatment some people can assauge quite nicely with a few six packs and some one night stands may require sutures and legal services for others.



... and sometimes the responsibility is ALL theirs for lying, cheating and not honoring the same commitment they expect you to uphold, frequently at your expense.

Sorry, I think it does no-one any good to blame the victim and let the cheaters off the hook on the notion that they are only human and the victim should have calibrated their trust and forgiveness on that standard.

I once lived with someone who became involved with drugs. I had no idea this was the case when I met her, as she had a job in security that required background checks and drug testing. To make matters worse, she put me in legal peril by using my car to sneak around behind my back with a new druggie boyfriend, using it to hide and transport drugs they were distributing and selling.

How was this my responsibility? I made it plain I wanted NOTHING to do with drugs (which probably made me No Fun To Be With, even as her mother kept telling me to hang in there as The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Her ).

Yet it's not uncommon. Sheesh, if I have to do background checks and random drug testing to avoid the getting snagged by some pretty clever riff raff, what's the use in having 'someone'?



And someone of us are cynical curmudgeons for some Darn Good Reasons. We got the scars to prove it.


-Kerry O.

I agree that it's not what most people do, however, it was advice, not a statement of the way things are. Unfortunately, the way things should be is seldom the way they are.

I have scars... I'm careful, not cynical.. Cynical is just an excuse for those that can't get over something or crotchety old people...

I just think experience is a better teacher, or at least for the most part it is. I should know, I've hardly followed experience through my life and it really hardly works out. I guess it could be another 'six here, half dozen there' what works for some doesn't work for all.

Only if you have a wide variety of experiences to learn from.

I consider myself lucky to have lived many different experiences. And, I've noticed over the years that I usually get to live out those that I have judged harshly.

I have been rich enough to casually buy $300 purses.
I have been poor enough to have to eat dog food.
I have arrested people and put them in jail.
I have been arrested and put in jail.
I have been on the Dean's List in college.
I have dropped out of college due to an inability to pass any classes.
I have helped women escape domestic violence situations.
I have been the victim of domestic violence.
I have placed people in psychiatric hospitals.
I have been placed in a psychiatric hospital.
I have cheated on.
I have been cheated on.

This list could go on and on. It's only when you've walked in all the shoes that you can truly see the path. JMO.

Yeah well, if I didn't have a valid point there wouldn't be older people with Pre-Nups to protect them against the shallow people using Love to hoist the Jolly Roger. :)


-Kerry O.

I guess you and me luck out with having a multitude of experience, but reflecting back on some of the experiences and comparing them to past experiences...could the bad of been avoided if we had relied on experience of the past? In some cases, yes, others no, now we have to weigh out the positive and negative of the experiences we went through...and that is getting into personal territory I would think for the both of us. However, I will say, the positives of listening to past experiences on my accord would have far outweighed the impact of going through experiences I could have completly avoided.

Huh so their scars are the reason for prenups? I guess you were taken for a lot of money? Try a prenup rather than cynicism....

Okay, I see what you're saying now. And, that's true. If experience has taught you that Ding Dongs make you throw up, it's not a good idea to try Ding Dongs again.

Well you know what they say-- Youth and Beauty are no match for Age and Treachery.


-Kerry O.

No I've never heard anyone say that but I stay away from negative people so that's probably why....