I am not talking biological age here, but I wonder if the men here have just as much of a challenge finding emotionally MATURE females as I have had finding emotionally MATURE males.


In the forums, there are so many bright and intriguing characters both male and female. So why when I get messages in my userplane, the males seem so eager and snotty? Its like, if you dont pounce at their offers right away, their ego is hurt and they snap. One got upset because I didnt wish to talk about my BREASTS and sexual tastes with him, another because I was a bit hesitant to give out my email address, another because I asked him about a letter posted online to him from someone calling herself his fiance (this one I actually liked and spoke to several times before he suddenly was being deployed,,instead of responding about this mystery fiance)

I wonder what these guys would be like in REAL relationships,,,,,jeesh

I think that, when men, and women both learn to slow down, not be so eager to push the envelope...that things/relationships can be better!

I mean..."where's the fire"? There is no fire...slow down and smell the roses! You'll enjoy your trip a lot more!

I don't mean to get philosophical here...but if people could just back up for a few minutes...and really take the long/slow route to where you want to be with that person...it would be a lot better!

In a word..."haste makes waste"!

So many men, and women too...are not giving "time", time to do it's thing! You have to realize that the other person may or may-not be on the same page as you are.

The other person IS their on self, with their own ideas as to what they want, if they are ready, if you are what they are looking for.

If you meet someone, and the chemistry is good on both sides...then, just ease it along...don't push/shove it. Give it time to grow.

You don't plant a flower, and expect it to be in full bloom the next day...just like a relationship...you have to nurture it, for it to turn out beautiful!

Sorry for the long post...but got started, and didn't know when to shut-up! OK...that was my 2 cents worth!

You know that is a good point.
When you meet people in real life (like face to face), people seem to display the patience in getting to know people, but online you get to see the true colours of people a lot quicker because there are so many people on sites like this that they think they dont need to show the patience they normally would because then they can move on to somebody else who might show interest in the advances... In a nutshell, what you are seeing is the same thing that happens in real life (outside of these sites), but the whole process seems to be sped up .. if you know what I mean.

Either that or you are just talking to the "wrong" people.

Did you tell them that's how you feel?
If not, maybe nobody has, and that's why they continue to act that way.
Nobody wants people to think they're unappealing.

The reason for the big rush is because if you don't respond within 6 hours or so they are off somewhere or the buzz wore off! Once you do respond that's usually the end of them. The 21-24 year olds have no trouble at all wanting to email for the rest of their lives.

answers

in this disposable,.drivethrough society,...we forget what it means to wait,... ( unless you live in a BIG city,.ie traffic jams )

Well at least they weed themselves out early! I have found that one needs to be a bit more circumspect in email than in real life. Too many ways to be misunderstood in the first few email exchanges.

My question to your's is; Why does it matter? Keep your own standards & live life as YOU think it should be lived. Finding someone you can really "accept as they are"; is a real battle. If people are jerks/rude/impolite, tell them so. Set your standards, keep going & if THEY don't see you for what you are REALLY worth.
Ther prob. never will.

OPINION: We all need to live our lives, FIRST. Finding someone COMPATIBLE, second. The person that is worth all the pain of a REAL RELATIONSHIP, will find you.

Well, I have had trouble finding women that aren't BRATS. I suppose it's only because so many men let them get away with bratty behavior or don't know how to give them the metaphorical spanking they deserve.

IMHO: I would add that some of the behavior may be due to the medium being used (the internet)... although I do believe that hiding behind a computer screen and high speed connection creates an environment where people interact in a way that would not be acceptable in "real life" -- it shows their true self at the same time...

It seems to me that many people (men and women) have a skewed perception of what the internet is and how to behave while using it...

I also believe the thought of "well, I can just click on someone else" breeds a sense that the person can just dispose of a conversation lightly and/or behave in an insensitive manner... as they troll for someone that will accept their "crap" (for lack of a better term)...

I think that, in part - dating sites understand this and even make it too convenient to "move on" "click on" and "spam as many people as possible" so that they (they pay dating sites) can retain their memberships for a longer period of time, and make more money...

If someone cannot have respect while behind a computer screen - how can they ever have credibility in real life?....

*sigh*

to your original question -- I think it is very difficult to find emotionally mature people... I find they are already in healthy relationships!!!

$.02

boobs!

I agree with the drive through, instant everything society we live in comment. Yes emtional mature women are difficult to find. It is very frustrating, to not be able to hold an intelligent conversation with someone, they are more interested in telling you how they want to lick my tattoo, or they just go from full bore to out the door.

my personal motto

"You're only young once. But you can be immature your whole life"


wanna pull my finger?

I agree with Agoodguy1026, many people believe that because it's the internet they have license to be as obnoxious as they want, and there will be no consequences. The same men- or women- who make rude, inappropriate comments online might not be so quick to do so if they were in a face to face situation for fear of being slapped, ridiculed or worse. So basically they're cowards. I ignore them and eventually they get the message and move on.

I agree with him.^^^

Now, can we see boobs?

lick your tattoo? seriously? ewwwww,,,lol

it is not a good sign when they snap under the strain of email

Yup, goes both ways sadly.