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| Topic: Tolerance/Intolerance | |
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Okay... not naming names.... the word 'box' was used to refer to a female part on the forums here. Is this no degrogatory? At the risk of causing further offense, I'd like to say that I don't think its inherently derogatory. I know there are many reasons to think of it as inherently derogatory, but I still think that all meaning is projected onto words, and not everyone projects meaning the same way. I do think that you are doing a good thing to express your feelings on the matter, and I think it is unkind of people to use such language when they know that other's feel as you do. Violence on television... ...and in other media. I agree. I am opposed to censorship, but would love it if our society was mature enough to reject the glorification of violence (voting with our dollars). |
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Okay... not naming names.... the word 'box' was used to refer to a female part on the forums here. Is this no degrogatory? At the risk of causing further offense, I'd like to say that I don't think its inherently derogatory. I know there are many reasons to think of it as inherently derogatory, but I still think that all meaning is projected onto words, and not everyone projects meaning the same way. I do think that you are doing a good thing to express your feelings on the matter, and I think it is unkind of people to use such language when they know that other's feel as you do. Violence on television... ...and in other media. I agree. I am opposed to censorship, but would love it if our society was mature enough to reject the glorification of violence (voting with our dollars). You really don't think referring to a body part, but other than it's name can't be derrogatory? To me that term is demeaning and puts women down by objectifying women and minimizing them to a body part, referred to as an object. (And no I am not offended... I just don't see how referring to women by this term can't be derogatory. Isn't it better to say 'I like women' than 'I like box', though the latter does show the person's character. IMO) |
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Perhaps I am more sensitive to it due to negative personal experiences. I can relate to this statement, and I think this is a way in which people can become 'more sensitive' due to age. Some people become 'less tolerant' as they age, due to the accumulation of 'bad experiences'. Many tend to think 'tolerance is good', but in this case maybe not - if you have become 'less tolerant' of 'word choices which tend to encourage/reinforce the objectification of women', that could be a 'good' kind of intolerance. |
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Edited by
massagetrade
on
Sat 12/05/09 09:03 PM
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You really don't think referring to a body part, but other than it's name can't be derrogatory? You lost me on the negations, there. I do think one can refer to anything using any word at all and have such be devoid of offense (and have no derogatory meaning), neither intended nor received - it depends on the people and the meanings they project onto the words. To me that term is demeaning and puts women down by objectifying women and minimizing them to a body part, referred to as an object. Are we talking about 'referring to women as a body part' or 'using a term for a body part' ??? Maybe I need to reread this thread. These are two very different things. Of maybe you all know the specifics, and the specifics hadn't been given. I assume you are not offended by 'vagina'. But if someone says "I met some great vaginas last weekend", I would find that derogatory. 'I like women' than 'I like box', though the latter does show the person's character. IMO) |
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Edited by
Bushidobillyclub
on
Sat 12/05/09 09:43 PM
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Boxes hold things. Simplifying terms tends to rob them of their emotional content.
Honestly I cant be offended by characterizations, becuase it presupposes character and places the subject into a box, a box they may not fit inside. Presupposing without regard to fact is no better then make believe. Why get offended by make believe? After all if the shoe does not fit why be worried about what the shoe looks like or smells like? I do not keep such shoes around the house . . . Honestly such attempts at demeaning language say far more about the person who uses the language then the person who is the object of such attempts. I myself find great enjoyment at the lack of wit involved. I tend to use wit to follow up, and when such wit goes over the heads of the initiators my enjoyment is compounded. |
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Boxes hold things. Simplifying terms tends to rob them of their emotional content. Honestly I cant be offended by characterizations, becuase it presupposes character and places the subject into a box, a box they may not fit inside. Presupposing without regard to fact is no better then make believe. Why get offended by make believe? After all if the shoe does not fit why be worried about what the shoe looks like or smells like? I do not keep such shoes around the house . . . Honestly such attempts at demeaning language say far more about the person who uses he language then the person who is the object of such attempts. I myself find great enjoyment at the lack of wit involved. I tend to use wit to follow up, and when such wit goes over the heads of the initiators my enjoyment is compounded.  
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I saw that post..so I know what your referring to. I guess for me, it would bother me if the intent was to be mean, the actually verbiage doesn't bother me. Personally I think verbiage is important, because there is context behind it. Yes, the individual didn't mean any ill with the comment, but to me it is degrading to use a term like that, especially in that context. Now I understand this is just my opinion. And I am not trying to make a fuss about that particular post, just used it as an example. Yes, I think context makes all the difference. I dont find offense in words alone but in the context in which they are used. There are terms used in the blue collar comedy club that could be used in offensive context but obviously arent and therefore dont offend me in the context of that comedy. There are other situations and contexts where those same words would be offensive though. Intent and context are much more meaningful than words themselves,,for me. |
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I seem to have less tolerance for violence, derogatory language, prejudice, and such. Does this intolerance for vulgarity come from becoming more educated or increasing age? Just wondering what people have to say about the topic. I think, after having seen and heard so much of it, that you just eventually get tired of all the crazy bs in the world. Those attributes are all childish in nature and feeds an ego which is unsatisfied in itself and compensates by taking it out on everyone else. Or... You maybe forgot to take your meds sweetie...  
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If it was a male, perhaps he meant to explain what body parts he likes, as opposed to being into other men,,,I didnt read it,,so I dont know,,could be anything until the context is put into perspective
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The post where this term (box) was used was referring to myself and another woman. I suppose for me I was not offended because the poster is a friend of mine, one I talk with on the phone...so I understand the intend was not to harm.
When there is a post by one who I do not know, who tells me as a pacifist I am worthless, negatively judges my parenting, or intentionally trolls in a thread where I am attempting to spread a positive message...I see that as mean spirited and an attempt at hurting me. My tolerance for that is less than a term used...not much, like I said not a lot bothers me for to long. |
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I seem to have less tolerance for violence, derogatory language, prejudice, and such. Does this intolerance for vulgarity come from becoming more educated or increasing age? Just wondering what people have to say about the topic. I'm not sure what gives rise to intolerance of ignorance. I'm sure age plays a role in the early going. I was intolerant of ignorance from quite an early age and because of it I became a recluse to avoid it. Unfortunately I just didn't know how to seek out more mature and intelligent friends. So rather than try, I just withdrew from the guys who lived in my local neigborhood who were always up to no good. I ended up being a loner, which wasn't exactly good either. I wonder if my tolerance, or what I like to call my allowing is more because I have been alone and working from home so long, I didn't have to deal with people. Much easier to allow from a distance. Having my position change over the last couple of months and having to go to the office environment has had it's challenges. |
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Edited by
jrbogie
on
Sun 12/06/09 05:21 AM
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Okay... not naming names.... the word 'box' was used to refer to a female part on the forums here. what part would that be? sorry, couldn't help myself.  Violence on television... The brand new show 'flashforward' it was called.. I think. I had to turn it off several times. Not only because my young son was in the room, but because of it's general content. do you have a solution or are you just ranting about things that you don't approve of that others might enjoy. a show doesn't doesn't stay on tv unless there is wide acceptance of it's content. I do take stuff personally, that I 'consume' or is produced from mass consumption. but you are not being forced to "consume". and nothing is produced "from" mass consumption; it's produced "for" mass consumption as in this is what the masses want to consume and will pay to consume it. |
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Boxes hold things. Simplifying terms tends to rob them of their emotional content. Honestly I cant be offended by characterizations, becuase it presupposes character and places the subject into a box, a box they may not fit inside. Presupposing without regard to fact is no better then make believe. Why get offended by make believe? After all if the shoe does not fit why be worried about what the shoe looks like or smells like? I do not keep such shoes around the house . . . Honestly such attempts at demeaning language say far more about the person who uses the language then the person who is the object of such attempts. I myself find great enjoyment at the lack of wit involved. I tend to use wit to follow up, and when such wit goes over the heads of the initiators my enjoyment is compounded. Sometimes I love you. 
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The post where this term (box) was used was referring to myself and another woman. I suppose for me I was not offended because the poster is a friend of mine, one I talk with on the phone...so I understand the intend was not to harm. When there is a post by one who I do not know, who tells me as a pacifist I am worthless, negatively judges my parenting, or intentionally trolls in a thread where I am attempting to spread a positive message...I see that as mean spirited and an attempt at hurting me. My tolerance for that is less than a term used...not much, like I said not a lot bothers me for to long. This is an example of two people who are friends using what would normally be considered derogatory language with each other but using it as a term of endearment. I have black friends who do this with each other and I have girlfriends who do it as well. Unfortunately, when you are on a public forum like this there are a lot of people reading what you are writing who do not know you or the poster. Not to say you can't do it. Just something to think about. |
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There was a post a few days ago then basically said that all women were good for was to duct tape their mouths and spread their legs. I was very offended at this remark and the poster has made similar remarks about women. The poster's position is that he is only joking. I was wondering if I said the exact same statment but started it with "Jews" or "Blacks" if it would be equally acceptable?
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I seem to have less tolerance for violence, derogatory language, prejudice, and such. Does this intolerance for vulgarity come from becoming more educated or increasing age? Just wondering what people have to say about the topic. I think, after having seen and heard so much of it, that you just eventually get tired of all the crazy bs in the world. Those attributes are all childish in nature and feeds an ego which is unsatisfied in itself and compensates by taking it out on everyone else. Or... You maybe forgot to take your meds sweetie... Not on meds yet, but just might need some!
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Edited by
Spidercmb
on
Sun 12/06/09 08:38 AM
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There was a post a few days ago then basically said that all women were good for was to duct tape their mouths and spread their legs. I was very offended at this remark and the poster has made similar remarks about women. The poster's position is that he is only joking. I was wondering if I said the exact same statment but started it with "Jews" or "Blacks" if it would be equally acceptable? For the Jews, I doubt anything would happen. When I complained about anti-Jew remarks on the forums, I was told "Everyone is entitled to their own opinion". Edit: I do find the post you were referring to offensive, but I haven't seen it myself. I'm a bit misogynistic, so if I find it offensive, something is really wrong with it. |
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There was a post a few days ago then basically said that all women were good for was to duct tape their mouths and spread their legs. I was very offended at this remark and the poster has made similar remarks about women. The poster's position is that he is only joking. I was wondering if I said the exact same statment but started it with "Jews" or "Blacks" if it would be equally acceptable? For the Jews, I doubt anything would happen. When I complained about anti-Jew remarks on the forums, I was told "Everyone is entitled to their own opinion". Edit: I do find the post you were referring to offensive, but I haven't seen it myself. I'm a bit misogynistic, so if I find it offensive, something is really wrong with it. I generally have a pretty thick skin, but I do have my limits. As far as your first comment, it does seem that there are certain groups that are allowed to be targeted more than others. I understand this is a forum and if we want to discuss things we have to understand that there are views out there radically different from ours and sometimes offensive. And, I don't want so much censorship that we can't talk. But, direct attacks and derogatory statements are uncalled for and should be removed. I don't know the comment you are referring to so it's hard for me to make a judgement about it. But, I have seen a lot of statements that were just disgussting and had nothing to do with the debate at all. |
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I seem to have less tolerance for violence, derogatory language, prejudice, and such. Does this intolerance for vulgarity come from becoming more educated or increasing age? Just wondering what people have to say about the topic. Having an aversion to the ugly aspects of humans is actually a good quality. I noticed, with myself, that as I have grown older I am more outspoken about it, even though I disliked it all along. |
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There was a post a few days ago then basically said that all women were good for was to duct tape their mouths and spread their legs. I was very offended at this remark and the poster has made similar remarks about women. The poster's position is that he is only joking. I was wondering if I said the exact same statment but started it with "Jews" or "Blacks" if it would be equally acceptable? yes, which was put in a thread with a positive message....which was done intentionally to disrupt the flavor of the thread..that is my point. I find that more disturbing. It isn't a joke, it is for shock value..to throw off the theme of the thread. |
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