k well ive been dating this girl who is going through divorce and we seem to fight on weekends all the time mainly when we drink shes mean and says mean stuff and is very flirty,we been dating for 4 months and are trying to make it work she has 4 kids that i have hung out with and they love me to death but we tend to fite and then we dont talk for a couple of days at a time she says she loves me im the love of her life tonite she was with her x getting drunk and when i called her he answered and said shes been lying to me saying she has been telling him that she hasnt spoke to me at all.and she wants me to move in with her this week and have a family with her and her kids .her x was gonna move to texas so she didnt care about him and all she ewanted was me and the kids to make her happy why then is she partying and with him tonite if she loves me

She's a messed up drunk.

Ask her when she is sober, forget the discussion when you both drink that will never get you anywhere, ask her and judge on what she says sober.

I feel a need to respond in a way that I really think your questions need to be responded to, even though it may mean some serious soul searching for you and with that some consequent heartache.
Here is a very dysfunctional threesome and you have four young children involved in what is essentially an irresponsible adult hysteria. Can you not see that it is children who are agonising over a horrible (adult) lack of moral responsibility, and seek only to have loving and nurturing adult care around themselves? It appears from the limited amount of information that you have given that all three of you need to submit yourselves to three different counsellors who hold three different big sticks to beat you with. What by your behaviour do you present to these children? What by your lady's behaviour does she present to these children? What by their father's behaviour does he present to these children?
They have learned very early on in life how to tell lies,they have learned that it is normal and somehow morally acceptable to sleep around, and also they learn that drinking and fighting is the norm, and that periods of calm and even bliss precede the storms emotionally.
Step out...Step away...This situation is fraught with terrble dislocations and pain. Give what support you can from afar to the children, if that is what you determine the best course of action and let them know that you are available as a adult who offers only care and protection and deep concern for their wellbeing.
For your own protection and wellbeing STEP OUT...STEP AWAY

What a mess.
Shut the door on this, take some time off.
Good Luck.

run...been there,it aint good

Two words for ya.....Train Wreck! That is what she is. She is a mess right now, and she doesn't need to be dating anyone and you certainly do not need to be dating her right now. She aint ready for all that dude.

If only one person is trying to make it work...it simply won't work. Mean drunks are weird, of course then again so are flirty drunks...apparently it is "okay" if they are drunk. Wait? It's that easy? Well ****, I'm drunk a lot...

I understand your pain. Many women have a very sharp tongue. You cannot allow her to intimidate you with her personal attacks. My advice is when you feel she is being verbally abusive smile at her, get up and without a word get in your car and leave. Go out and do something fun. See a movie or visit friends or surf the web. If she calls your cell phone answer. If she is still abusive, hang up.

Every time you allow her to behave this way you are setting a president. It will only get worse the longer you put up with it. She does this to bully you. If she can push you around she'll lose respect for you. Do not allow it. If you want to be respected you must earn it.

She doesn't love you.

She has been using you.

Run for your life.

I'd say, listen to what 99% of the repondents on here have said so far. RUN AWAY! RUN FAST! This girl is toxic bad news. I know. I've had a similar situation and had to find out the hard way. I am sick to death about the people in this world that say "Oh, that poor girl." No! No more pity, no more tolerance, these people are bad news that act this way, and you should avoid them like the plague, or she'll get you too. If you like abuse, seek out a dominatrix, not this piece of dirt.

be seeing you

1- stop drinking
2- if she wants to be with him....walk away....simple as that

why don't you discuss this with her over a couple of drinks

Hmm it sounds as though she's possibly rather confused ,Going through a divorce and dating at same time isn't a good mix .You sound alright yourself as for fighting I'd put that down to maybe her mixed emotions they need dealt with first I'd say before you can move on as a couple/Familly .

As for fighting and drinking put a stop to it drink only makes things worse whatever is feeling inside will come out .
It's obvious that you girl needs time upon her own bud to deal with the emotions and lay to rest before anything else can go head.

As for moving in well you might be putting yourself in line of fire so speak maybe best just being there for her and continue to be a friend if she needs you and knows that your there shell approach you when ready .

Best wishes ...

With all the compassion I can muster .... RUNNNNNNN!!!! Now and fast! This has heartache written all over it

AAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As harsh as it sounds...you guys need to slow down, take a step back, and reevaluate everything. This sounds like a dysfunctional family in the making

Run away from her as fast as you can!! This chick is whack!! Nothing good will ever come from trying to have any sort of connection to a girl like her

your being played