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Topic: What makes a player?
TexasScoundrel's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:08 AM
I have always been of the opinion that this whole man woman thing is a game and we all play it. If a person is very good at the game I'd say (s)he is a player. However, I have noticed that many other people have a differant view. They seem to feel that a player is someone that lies or plays head games.

What are your views?

no photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:09 AM
Player = liar/cheater

TexasScoundrel's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:12 AM
Okay, so what is your word for someone that dates several people at once, but is truthful about it?

Jess642's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:15 AM

Okay, so what is your word for someone that dates several people at once, but is truthful about it?


Polyamorous.

no photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:15 AM

I have always been of the opinion that this whole man woman thing is a game and we all play it. If a person is very good at the game I'd say (s)he is a player. However, I have noticed that many other people have a differant view. They seem to feel that a player is someone that lies or plays head games.

What are your views?


William Shakespeare wrote about this subject: All the worlds a stage and all the men and women merely players (from the play As You Like It)

Ladylid2012's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:15 AM
To me a player is one who wants to play the field, be a serial dater, get layed, stay detached. I think a young player is just boosting his/her ego and a need to feel important. An older player is just so jaded, that is all they can do.

no photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:16 AM

Okay, so what is your word for someone that dates several people at once, but is truthful about it?


whore/slut/polygamist, depends on the situation

TexasScoundrel's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:22 AM
Such harsh words. What about libertine?

no photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:26 AM

Okay, so what is your word for someone that dates several people at once, but is truthful about it?


There's absolutely nothing wrong with dating more than one person at a time, provided you're scrupulously honest about it, aren't leading anyone on and everyone is on the same page with it. Also, if you're sleeping with more than one, protecting yourself and your partners is an absolute necessity.

My definition of player: someone who deliberately leads you to believe that you're the only one (or could be), someone who is lying and/or cheating, someone who doesn't think of anyone's feelings, someone who is doing all of those things simply to boost their own ego. Someone who will do anything to get what they want within that "relationship" until it doesn't suit them anymore.

Jess642's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:26 AM

Such harsh words. What about libertine?


Ahhhh.... I have a dear friend who is a libertine!....and although he is not comfortable in a longterm monogomous relationship, he is incredibly respectful...which I suspect that you are also TS...

futuremon's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:27 AM
Edited by futuremon on Wed 09/02/09 02:29 AM
I've been called a player before, but I don't see myself as one.

To women (IMHO) a player is someone (a man) who will say or do almost anything to get the object of their attraction into bed with them.

To men (IMHO) a player is a lady who just wants to get what they can get from a man and "putting out" is a part of the game.

To me, I just want to have a good time when I'm out. I may extend myself beyond my comfort zone when I'm flirting with a lady, but I'd never violate my own moral principals.

I guess to me, a "player" would be someone who's ultimate goal is to "bust a nut" (male or female respective).

Someone said a player = "liar/cheater" but I would disagree with that sentiment. That reply is from someone who must be jaded by past experience. There are plenty of liars and cheaters who aren't players...I know because I was married to one.......lol

- P

no photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:28 AM
Ladylid...serial dater?? I have never heard that term.

no photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:37 AM

Such harsh words. What about libertine?


laugh Now you're assuming I'm listing them out of judgement? As I've said on this site a million times, what other people do is none of my concern, as long as it doesn't affect me. Therefore, those words are only "harsh" if you choose to take them that way. You asked a question and I answered it, truthfully. As for the word "libertine," that's not a word I see fit to use in casual conversation so I omitted it. smokin

Ladylid2012's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:37 AM

Ladylid...serial dater?? I have never heard that term.


just kinda jumped into my head...

TexasScoundrel's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:39 AM

Ahhhh.... I have a dear friend who is a libertine!....and although he is not comfortable in a longterm monogomous relationship, he is incredibly respectful...which I suspect that you are also TS...


I do my best. But, managing the expectations of others can be difficult.

no photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:45 AM

I have always been of the opinion that this whole man woman thing is a game and we all play it. If a person is very good at the game I'd say (s)he is a player. However, I have noticed that many other people have a differant view. They seem to feel that a player is someone that lies or plays head games.

What are your views



I think it is all semantics. I think the work player for most people conjures up negative behaviors.
There are rituals involved in dating, behaviors, you could call that playing the game. If you do nothing you will not enter the dating "field".
I do not often hear the word player. I guess if someone said be careful he is a player then I would proceed with caution.

TexasScoundrel's photo
Wed 09/02/09 02:57 AM
I suppose it is. But, words are our tool for communicating. It's important that we all understand what is ment when someone uses a word. I was unclear about the term player.

Gossipmpm's photo
Wed 09/02/09 03:06 AM
I love to play along!

What a rush!!!

TexasScoundrel's photo
Wed 09/02/09 08:42 PM

I love to play along!

What a rush!!!


Yes, the rush. That is what we live for.

TxsGal3333's photo
Wed 09/02/09 09:12 PM
Edited by TxsGal3333 on Wed 09/02/09 09:12 PM
To me it is one that dates several regardless if he/she is being honest with them or not he/she has no intentions of a relationship at all. It is more the merrier for them with no strings attached. And it does not matter to them if the women/men fall for them for they are only in it for one thing to get them to bed no matter what they have to say in order to accomplish their goal..........whoa

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