That may be true, Fifer.

But there are some people who try to concentrate on one person at a time.

I have been emailing back and forth with someone that I met here,(No Names out of respect for her, if she wants to reveal, then she can)
and last night we had our first phone chat, we talked for an hour or so then we got off of the phone. 20 minutes later she called me back and ask if we could chat some more. I was very moved by this. Today I got another email from her telling me that she enjoyed our talk and wants to talk more and get to know each other more and I agree, I am fascinated with her too.

Here is my problem, a couple of people who are just friends, got upset because I am not interested in being single while I am working on getting to know this other lady.
I think it is unfair to spend time trying to get to know someone and continuing to play as if your still available. These friends never showed any signs of being interested in me as far as dating, but when out of excitement I tell them I am interested in someone and we are talking and getting to know each other, they get upset and tell me, "You are still single, just because you are trying to get to know each other doesn't mean you cant still play the game". I disagree, I think I need to focus on her, as she is focusing on me as well.

Whats your take on this? Am I out of line in thinking that I don't need to be exposing myself as single when I am working on something with someone else. We haven't met yet, she lives very far away, but we are interested in each other and we are fondly talking to each other. My profile clearly states that I want plenty of friends, but only one lover. So why is it so hard for anyone else to understand that they are friends but she is someone I am connecting with on a different level?

Love, however, only really happens when there is face to face, in person contact.

Oh no Doubt, I am still very single, but I don't want to get to know her, and her, and her, and her, and her. Its not fair, its very misleading and that's what players do.

anyway at this point i ask ur forgiveness, what would i know it's not why i'm here.

I asked your opinion cause I wanted to hear it.
Its OK, we all need help from outside cause it is so easy to get blinded when it happens to you.
I appreciate you fifer

ARE...are you talking about me?

Now, yes you are exposing yerself....

how can you define love for another person?

perhaps it can't happen for you but who's to say what another feels isn't love?

i'll argue this til i'm blue in the face because i've no doubt i was in love with robin before i physically met him.

thanks John i wasn't being horrible but i wasn't thinking either

how can you define love for another person?

perhaps it can't happen for you but who's to say what another feels isn't love?

i'll argue this til i'm blue in the face because i've no doubt i was in love with robin before i physically met him.

Whatever John, I respect you for going with your gut, and doing what feels comfortable.


I date, and see many at one time, but if it comes to intimacy, or sex, I cut it down to one person, and give them that respect.


Im very confident, and open though with my partner.


If someone wants me to be exclusive, or give them a chance at a ltr, then it takes consideration, and lots of time.


You know whats right for you.

It would only be a concern that you dont put all of you into the relationship, and keep a safe distance before I love yous, and major commitments, that could cause you upset, and frustration from a distance, OR ya know, not realy knowing the person well, cos you havent spent time in person.

Ya dont know if you will have that important attraction, or chemistry in person.

I speak on this from LOTS of experience with internet relationships.

Good luck.

But what if, just for the sake of argument/debate, when you DID meet him, he wasn't what you thought he would be? What if he had deceived you in some way??

That is why I say it can only really happen when there is face to face contact. The meeting can solidify what you already feel, or it can completely change it.

Until that point, there is just no way to really know.

AHHHH, now why'd you go and tell them, it was a secret Modela..

If something is EXPOSED, please tell me so I can cover it.

I have to tell them the truth now John

You gotta cover it John... you gotta.... everybody is seeing it....

Wish everyone was as honest as you. You are so right to feel the way you do.

how can you define love for another person?

perhaps it can't happen for you but who's to say what another feels isn't love?

i'll argue this til i'm blue in the face because i've no doubt i was in love with robin before i physically met him.

Seeing what??? Where is it???? What is IT ????
FIXXXXXX IIITTTTTTT.