I read the forum rules on how to post and that person guaranteed I'd find someone faster that way but I think it's bs, and here's why.

When making a profile on a dating website, what do they ALWAYS recommend and say it will improve results... upload a picture! Sadly, this is the truth, because we have such high expectations that we want someone who is attractive before we'll even talk to them. That's not to say I'd talk up a conversation with everyone under the sun but some people are just sad. Here's an example:

On another popular free dating website, I setup a fake account with a friend of mine's pics(with his permission) and he is known around the circle of friends to be very good looking. As you might expect, girls are MUCH more responsive to his messgaes opposed to those messages I'd send(usually a day or do later, so that she wouldn't suspect any foul play).

Not only that, but girls were generally more open about their pasts than they were with my real profile. Numerous girls admitted to one-night stands, sexual partners, and one girl even gave her number after only a few messages(most of which were me intentionally acting like a jerk). A few girls were also very open to the idea of trading nude pictures(something I didn't even bring up to them!) all for a guy who for all they know might not even be available or, worse yet, not the guy they see in the profile.

The point is: girls LOVE attention from a good-looking guy. They will put up with him being a jerk so they can "try to change him" but we all know that's not gonna happen. Sadly, I think the problem is that if girls get attention from ONE good-looking guy online, they immediately filter out all the guys who don't match up, because they think "If I can get one hot guy to message me, surely I can get others". Do I feel bad for tricking them? Hell no! It was an experiment I'm glad I did because it shows the truth that girls are indeed more superficial than they claim to be... at least online. I can't say the same for a girl who first meets a guy in person.

On the flip side, being kind and courteous? What a load of crap! Girls hate that stuff. If they could have their way, they'd have a super hot guy treat them like total crap over a mediocre guy treating them like a queen. Like I said, with the fake profile, within the first message or 2, I was bringing up personal questions and most were very willing to answer. Now, some were questions I'd never ask from my real profile... I just have too much respect for a girl to ask that kind of stuff. But I suppose that's the problem. I care too much.

You forgot to add that girls have cooties...

But seriously, I think your experiment revealed a lot about some girls but, not all. The more mature ones...the ones worth waiting and searching for will not be impressed with the good looking guy with the bad boy attitude. If gals could realize this in high school there wouldn't be the divorce rate there is.

LOL, I'm just messing with you OP. Actually I conducted an experiment of my own just like this on another site. What I was testing was different than what you were testing, but my results were the same- people are superficial.

ok.... not all women are like that! Yes it is nice to get attention from a hot guy but the instant he brings up anything sex related I run. Just means he wants one thing, I am NOT looking for a one-night stand. I will talk to a guy no matter what he looks like, I may not be attracted to him but I can always use friends, and I will let him know that. I think you still have a LOT to learn about women and life. JMP

Not everyone is as open-minded as you are though.

yes very true but still... why group people? I know a couple guys who are...jerks. You don't see me going around calling all guys jerks! It just really gets under my skin when people do this!

What about my post implied that I don't know much about women? Trust me, I know LOTS about how to make a woman smile, what's sweet, what's creepy, what kind of thing makes their friends jealous, what gets them going(physically), etc. It's not like I've never had a relationship. It's just getting woman past that physical attraction barrier that is the toughest part.

Good thing you're not on a dating website then.

so ummmmmm

what you're saying is,

nice guys finish last and girls really want bad boys?

why didn't I think of that?

Yeah, but that's not necessarily a gender thing. I think, if you play that experiment the other way around, you probably get the same results with the guys being more interested in the cute girl than the "average" one.

Not that it makes it right (or wrong) -- just human nature.



I've had a lot of them send me a phone number in a first e-mail (not on this site), which is an automatic Red Flag Supreme.

But as to the openness about their pasts, etc., I can't really address that, since the nine I've met from dating sites were all total and absolute unrepentent liars -- ranging from an arsonist to a phony bank teller to a phony kidnap victim, and none of this stuff was ever mentioned in their profiles....



It's more common than you might think. I'm no matinee idol, but everyone I've ever been with (with one exception) has tried to change me.



But "superficial" is the default setting for both sexes, in my experience.



I was that way, for a long time. Then, after having lived through one relationship after another after another after another, ad infinitum, where all they wanted to do was change me into a sitcom dad, I finally realized that it's better to be alone than to be with the wrong person.

My experience: they don't want a "good" guy -- they want a guy who makes a good puppet.

might have something to do with wearing a "crack" shirt that women can't get past

I think this is not a gender thing sorry, this is something some people do not all of us. I know if someone is too good looking they have way harder time impressing me. I don't give a damn really what someone looks like I am wanting the whole package. Not just a slice of a pie.

My advice would be instead of making fake profiles, work on who you are and be happy with it. Til you do no one is going to be happy with you either.

good luck

the last part of your post saying women don't like guys to be nice...I don't know what kind of women you are talking to but that is soo not true. I would rather have an average looking guy who treats me with respect then some hot jerk!

lol!!! yes, because a) this shirt is about crack and supports and encourages it and b) I wear it anywhere but in my house. lol that's GOTTA be why I can't find the right girl.

Ok put it this way: ATTRACTIVE WOMEN go for the hot guys, which are typically jerks.

I am who I am... I don't have to "work on it". you make it sound like I spent months under a fake profile and was never the real Danny. It was only for about 2 weeks and spent maybe 10 minutes a day. Not exactly a social outcast like you imply.

Lots of guys say that though; that we want "the bad boy" and not "the nice guy." I like a guy to be nice to me, I just have trouble finding one who will. And most of the time, the self-proclaimed "nice guy" isn't that nice at all.

are you saying your not a hot guy??? coulda fooled me...