Topic: Sex on the first date
Loyaldad08's photo
Sat 05/09/09 07:10 PM
If we're done bullshi^^ing, we can get to the fun now!

no photo
Sat 05/09/09 07:29 PM
Edited by singmesweet on Sat 05/09/09 07:30 PM

If, and I repeat, If sex is the goal then why wouldn't one to acheive one's goal, immediately. If intimacy is the goal, why not achieve that as soon as possible. If being correct is the goal, caution and moving slowly may be in order.

Personally, I don't give a flip about not ever making another mistake but I do care about immediate and everlasting gratification, intense intimacy and I'll worry about the next dated later.


Is sex the only goal? If so, then of course someone is going to be looking for that instant gratification. It isn't for everyone, though.


ron62449's photo
Sun 05/10/09 03:32 PM

I never get sex on the first date. MEN, shsssssh!grumble


Mechristy, I read your profile. Just separated, wanting to take it slow. Wanting a friend.

I'm not sure? these two statements conflict. What do you want, sex on the date or taking it slow.

Ron

Monier's photo
Sun 05/10/09 03:35 PM
If this topic ever came up on a first date, I think I would give a sly reply such as 'I'm having sex with you right now'

nessa80's photo
Sun 05/10/09 05:17 PM
I can understand that...however, there have been many times where I have been quite up front about the fact that I am not interested in sex on the first date and they still are very persistent; to the point where I get pissed and I tell them I will find my own way home. I have been running into this situation for the past four years and it has really gotten past the point of ridiculous.

nessa80's photo
Sun 05/10/09 05:18 PM

Well most men are sex driven.
And alot of girls will put out on the first date.
SO you have those girls to thank for.

Men are very visual. Meeting a girl the first time, its very physical, since there is no other factors to really go by. He does not really know your likes and dislikes, or personality, nor does he really care at first. You set the parameters and limitations for this date, cuz the guy does not really have any. It's simple if you tell a guy:" I wanna have sex with you" most guys will not hesitate, and will hop right on. So its your job to let him know what your limits are. It doesn't even have to be communicated in a verbal way. Use bodylanguage.

I think the guy will not even attempt to ask you if you send out the right signals. He will respect you too much to even make that move, he is probably thinking about having sex with you the whole night, but if you send out the right signal, he will never ask you to, or push himself on you, out of fear of rejection.



I replied but didnt do it right...see my next post. :D

nessa80's photo
Sun 05/10/09 05:20 PM

These post seem to pop up from time to time , and they make me wonder. Is something wrong with me ? Sex just isnt that high on my list of priorities . Maybe its because I just find that sex isnt all that hard to find . Finding someone special to have it with on the other hand ,NOW thats a challenge .What ever happened to putting your best foot forward and getting to know someone before you want to play monkey and the banana .


My thoughts exactly!

nessa80's photo
Sun 05/10/09 05:22 PM


What is it with guys wanting to have sex with you the first date? I understand that not all guys are like this but apparently that is all I seem to be meeting! I would really just like a nice night out with someone who doesn't care that we are not going to have sex the first date and who doesn't think about bringing up the subject. Thoughts?


I know this will sound condescending but,
maybe you want to put that on your profile(s)?

As far as meeting off the net, you "could" just tell them that you have no intent of having sex with a man until you've dated for a couple months...


Thanks but this has already been done and it really did not have an effect.

nessa80's photo
Sun 05/10/09 05:27 PM

Here we go again another bash the guys Not once did I see any reference to woman doing that exact same thing. And believe me as you get older it gets to be more frequent then you think Women are just as aggressive I have found out on a personal note. Several times I have had to say nice thought but I really don't know you.. so give me and the guys a break. I am sure there are a lot of dunderheads out there that think with their penis... and here is your lolipop


Of course there are women like that out there but seeing as I am a woman, I am not referring to women. If you have an issue with women doing this to you, submit a post. The reason I post this is because I have been having this problem for quite some time even though I am very up front about it and it has gotten to the point where it is quite frustrating and that I am apprehensive about going out now because of the stress it cause in the constant badgering.

nessa80's photo
Sun 05/10/09 05:30 PM

Maybe you should try going out of your comfort zone and date someone totally different from your norm.
You may be pleasantly surprised at the result. winking


I actually do not have one thing in particular that you would call a comfort zone. Most of the things that I am attracted to are personality driven. The constant badgering of having sex completely over-shadows the qualities I like about the guy.

no photo
Mon 05/11/09 03:02 PM
I dont believe in sex on the first date, I dont believe in kissing on the first date. A hug is fine, I dont like to get too personal with someone too quickly. If I am interested I would not refuse a kiss if the woman brought it up, but sex is out.

yaneverknow777's photo
Mon 05/11/09 06:02 PM
I try not to, but well when they are starting it..

Beachfarmer's photo
Mon 05/11/09 06:11 PM
So......I guess this means a BJ is out of the question?

no photo
Mon 05/11/09 06:14 PM
you know you would if you were really attracted to him,just get a life and be happy!

no photo
Mon 05/11/09 06:14 PM

I never get sex on the first date. MEN, shsssssh!grumble

Women, shsssssh. I don't get sex on the first date either..grumble

AndyBgood's photo
Mon 05/11/09 06:15 PM
Since we all have beaten this one into teh ground I think I may as well light a fire here for the hell of it....


Anyone of you ladies out there want to have a meaningless romantic encounter this coming weekend with me????drool


spock

:banana: Yeah Baby!:banana:

pitchfork

I mean seriously, I see so much complaining out there...

What is funny is there is another thread of women complaining about not getting it at all and they make it sound like a booty call the way they talk in their posts!


Yep, I'm SOOO bad!flowers

SEXYLATINA666's photo
Mon 05/11/09 08:01 PM
never did but one day yea sure

nessa80's photo
Sun 05/17/09 10:46 AM

I dont believe in sex on the first date, I dont believe in kissing on the first date. A hug is fine, I dont like to get too personal with someone too quickly. If I am interested I would not refuse a kiss if the woman brought it up, but sex is out.


Thank you!

krupa's photo
Sun 05/17/09 10:55 AM
Maybe it is just me.....9 times out of 10...sex is hinted at or flat out requested on the first date....generally within the first couple hours of meeting....Seriously, more than once I have said in all honesty "Look, I am not interested in getting serously involved on an emotional level"...the general response..."Well, could we just have sex?"

Take my word for it...alot of women are just as horny as a lot of the guys.

Jtevans's photo
Sun 05/17/09 11:00 AM
how else are us guys supposed to know if a woman is worth a 2nd date?grumble