I recently had a conversation with my ex that I never thought I'd have. She asked if we could try again.
Now, I'm a firm believer in the fact that it takes two to make a relationship as well as break it, so I have always taken my share of fault in our breakup. The way she went about it was ( let's say ) less than admirable.
She brought up the fact that the kids would want it. She brought up the idea of an easier financial situation for both of us and she actually used the term, " The grass isn't always greener...".
I turned her down.
I told her that I'm fine with who I am and I can't go back to where we were. She was visibly hurt by this, but said O.K. with dignity. I also let her know that we've actually been civil to each other this way.
Now when the phone rings and I see it's her, I hand the phone to one of the kids instead of just answering like before. It just feels wierd.
I'm not looking for advice. I know what I want. I just want some reaction or similar stories.

( Just for those who don't know me, I've had my sons for 5 to 6 days a week for the last 4 years. So I'm not just living a swingers life. )

Sometimes it's best to leave the past in the past

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

My ex is an ex for a reason. Point blank the only place she kept her pants on was home.

It's tough. We see each other often because of the kids, So it's just odd and awkward now.

I like cheese.

Like lookin' in a mirror

How Frickin true is that!!!

good luck guy.............would be cheaper in the long run to buy faster tennis shoes......

Good, too many partners pull this in a relationship and the one who got hurt ends up running back and doing it all over again.

If you have a gallon of rotten milk and put it back in the fridge.... next time you take it out its still going to be rotten.

From what she said... it sounds to me like she put a lot of thought into convincing you of all the other reasons you should be together instead of coming out and saying "I miss you and I want to be with you" If she was a coward in your relationship before, she's still a coward now.

Amen

Slap her and show her who is da boss

She's always been about the paycheck, So I think alot of it has to do with finances. Like she's willing to suck it up 'cause She knows I've always done the right thing by my family.

That happen to me also and I said No too.....And I have to say it felt good lol:)

I admire your strength to know it won't be the right thing. Especially when there are kids involved, you don't want to make a decision like that lightly. It probably took them time to get used to the "new" situation. 2 years into it and mine are finally ok with the fact that Dad and Mom will never be together again.

There was some satisfaction in her reaction. But I'm not vindictive. There's too much energy spent on the negative these days and I'm trying to rise above those things.

My oldest ( 11 ) remembers us as a family the most and I know he has scars. But it would hurt him more for it to happen again.

It's my experience, that when you break up with someone, and then you're all alone...you start to remember all the great things you loved about them but you don't remember any of the bad. So..you go back to them and then after a few days you're like "oh yeah, this is why we broke up!" The 2nd time (or 3rd time) around NEVER works. Move on.