they don't approach me, and i don't approach them.......because i live in the middle of no-where!

This is the knee-jerk reaction I feel most guys give a woman who initiates conversation, regardless of how they'd LIKE to feel about it. JMO

I am basicly a shy person. Most of the women i have dated in my life asked me to take them out. The women i maried told me to. As i get older women dont ask me any more. Therefore here i am.

I also am a shy person...

Now I have no problem starting a conversation with a woman. Unless of course I am attracted to her.

I am a very nice guy and very respectful. I tend to overcompensate by doing nothing.

In these situations, when the girl says ANYTHING... smiles, makes a joke or you just share the right look. It means EVERYTHING to me and then I can start talking.

Re-Question... I know some women want to have the guy start the conversation... is this a "turn-off"??

I never initiate the conversation...phone call...email...IM or what ever it may be.

OK so do you do anything to tell a guy: "It's OK... come talk to me..." ?

Well so far it doesn't seem guys have any problem requesting an IM with me or send me emails reqesting a response.


So I guess I have never had to let anyone know it's ok. If I had to I don't think I would know how.

with me,it's best if they start the conversation




unless they wanna hear "hey,nice b00bs" (ok i'd say it either way"

I usually send a nudge before I initiate any conversation on here... If I get a nudge back... tell her I liked her prof.. see where it goes

well indio..that helps alot...i didn't know what this nudge buisness was about...so I guess that still counts as a guy initiating it..

Same for me. Plus Im a wee bit shy

Sounds like it doesn't matter if you are male or female...making the first move is scary. It's a miracle any of us ever have a conversation at all!

I am thinking a stare off is what we need - eye to eye contact. If you are interested, you move closer to each other. If it is a mutual match, you end up in a minumum 15 minute lip lock.

No words, no being tongue tied, just two people staring into each others eyes......
















Just Joshin you!

thats what i do too, i will send a nudge first and see what happens, if they respond back with a nudge or email, then i just move on.
By the way im Roni, nice to meet everyone!

i meant to say if they dont respond back then i move on.

hello Roni, welcome.

for my part I feel conflicted about the nudge vs email vs wait for someone to contact me. I suppose its just up to the type of persone that you are and enjoy spending time with. I dont have a problem sending off an Email however I usualy keep it breff and ask politely to get to know them. a profile is just a small snipit of who someone is and more than likely the creater has no idea how to place who they are and what they want in a few paragraphs. so... if you look cute to me and from what I read you sould like an interesting person then there it is. however there are times Ill nudge but not offten.

I enjoy a woman who initiates a conversation but have no issue with a woman who feels unconfortable doing so. rather like IRL when a woman will give that grinn or look but would not come over and say HI expecting a guy to not be interested in her even tho she is the hottest girl in the room. guess all not everyone sees in the mirror what others see.

also, in this day and age men have been preached at via the media that woman are wanting men who are so PC that some of us kinda just freeze up unsure of what to do and not wanting to seem a crazy stalker just for sending an email or nudge.

I ve to say, that is very refreshing to hear/read what u think. =)

Honestly, I don't take nudges to seriously but a little "hi" email is another thing entirely...

Maybe try the email first?

I think it means more the email when you are really trying to get to talk to someone, there are some websites they just allow you to use the nudge feature for free but actual email or messaging you would have to pay for it.