Are you the kind of person that was taught it is never okay to get angry and that you must always have good manners and be nice; especially if you are a woman? Then, when someone says or does something to purposely wound you (or perhaps knowingly says or does something that will re traumatize you) lash out angrily?

Does it ever shock people (that don't know you well) to know that you are a multidimensional person of many layers, facets....and that you indeed have many emotions, both positive and negative? That you feel and have a heart. That you have a vulnerable side.

Emotions aren't good or bad, they just are.

Anger is a healthy and valid emotion, but we as a society have been socialized not to show it or experience it appropriately or assertively.

We either turn it in, towards the self and it manifests as Depression/Anxiety, or we numb it/escape from it through compulsive behavior or numbing with mood altering substances, or perhaps we become aggressive or passive/aggressive in some way, shape, or form.

We are not socialized on how to express the emotion appropriately in most cases. I see it time and time again in my work and out in the world. I have also experienced it myself.

What is your relationship with anger?

Well anger is an emotion that I feel like any other you can control w/o any detrimental effects upon yourself or them.

First you need to find an outlet that works for you (myself the gym)

Then the bottom line is you think before you speak, say the words in a calm cool voice to the individual who angred you.

Walk away before thing exculate and go to your outlet for stress relief and inner focus

Oh, I just blurt out whatever I am feeling at the time. Poor cashiers in the stores, most are brain dead. I was on the phone on Wednesday with the company who handles my car payment, and their website wasn't letting me make my payment. They sent me to tech support and the girl was dumber than a box of rocks. I was so pissed off til I got off the phone. She just kept repeating herself like it would make the outcome different. I finally told her to shut up and just stop speaking. She said to me "maam, you DON'T have to be SOO rude!". But how was repeating herself over and over and over helping either one of us?

well most of the time they hire these people to read scripted comments

and when you get get on them you create more stress for them and then you change their thought process and hinder them in being able to give you any help

heck think of the call this way they are triing to help you, maybe they can maybe they can't but atleast they are triing

I was just trying to get her to admit that she couldn't help me. Hey its cool, computers have a mind of their own and they can't always be explained. I logged onto the same site yesterday and bam, made my payment on the very first try.

Anger you should try being a landlord.
I get it all the time. Excusses why they dont have the rent. Then when they get their court papers. How they leave the apartment when their done. Don't show up at court. The list goes on.

Oh my landlord is really cool. He is a very approachable person, and that is nice compared to some who are just so frigid. But the girl who used to live next door screwed him over big time,she was such a jerk. I wound up having to write a letter for him to take to court. She left 3 months early, never cleaned the place out, never paid her rent. He was really pissed.

excellent question,..

anger,..my relationship with anger,...


not too good,..I`m like a and that`s not a healthy outlet,..when I get really angry,.I feel like I could just k** someone,..,even more so lately

anger is an extremely powerful energy and if handled appropiately,..could be very beneficial,..just have to learn how to keep a lid on it,.but not too tight,..

any solutions ???

Anger for me is not a healthy emotion and it's usually not a valid emotion either.

For me anger is a choice. If I am given information or someone does something which I do not like...I then have a choice. I can deal with it in a reasonable manner or I can get angry and deal with it in an unreasonable manner. I need to step back when I am in situations which might cause me to choose to get angy. If I pause count to ten I will not choose anger and will find a resonable way to deal with the situation. Sometimes I need to pause for longer periods of time and go for a walk in the woods, motorcycle ride, the gym. This gives me the time I need to think the situation through to come up with a reasonable solution. Talking to friends about it helps a great deal as well. By doing these things I have not chosen to be angry in a very long time.

well the first step is to drive on arround the big lake there and let me take you out for coffee

well the first step is to drive on arround the big lake there and let me take you out for coffee



that could take a week

coffee sounds better

how did you know about the lake,..

well the first step is to drive on arround the big lake there and let me take you out for coffee



that could take a week

coffee sounds better

how did you know about the lake,..


ok,.maybe a couple days on the bike,..lol

It's about 50/50 on tenants. I can't remember anyone telling me they got laidoff couldn't pay and had to move out. they wait and make me kick them out.

Now see, I just don't understand that. Last time I checked most landlords are human. They'd rather be contacted and told what is wrong instead of being ignored.

that could take a week

coffee sounds better

how did you know about the lake,..


ok,.maybe a couple days on the bike,..lol
dragging my feet on the ice

how about I use a different means of transportation until the snow and ice are gone

I would in some cases things can be worked out or off. If I have some work that they are capable of doing.

Exactly! When I got put on bedrest, I called and told my landlord right away. He was extremely understandable, and told me that he appreciated the fact that I let him know right away. He told me not to worry about the rent at this time, and to just focus on getting better. Yeah, my landlord is pretty awesome!

Dealing with anger is part of my job. Whether its the residents while they are in dementia; The other shift coming on or the shift while I am leaving or about any person I have in contact at times. Its like normal operating conditions.

I suppose anger can be used in many different ways,..

bullying is not a good example,..