Until recently I was open to such a notion, but thanks be to God for helping set it straight with me - friends with benefits = lust. Sex only for the one you love.

You dont think that you can feel love for a special friend such as a FWB?

not the kind of love I'm talking about

Good for you

what happened to make you change your mind?

FWB can turn into something more special and sometimes yes it can ruin a friendship. I look at it this way you never know til you try.

Well I am glad you found peace with what your heart really desires. In this fast paced world you need to hold onto your core beliefs.

I personally find that two people can be drawn together for a miriad of reasons, if a great realationship starts out as a FWB situation, who is to say that was wrong?

my viewpoint until rebuked

Derek I'm just curious why the total change in opinion on FWB. I understand you were reborn but to totally change your opinion.

I'm starting to think a FWB is the way to go.

ooooohhhh he's a convert. Makes sense now

Hey honey...where have you been?????????

in my basement

Derekkye,

I thank God that you have come to this understanding and only hope that more people will. May I add - Sex only with the one you love after the marriage covenant.

Marriage is a contract between a man, woman and THE STATE.

You have to pay them to get married and you have to pay them to get divorced. The state used to have a thing where a woman needing a divorce could show her inability to pay for it and the state would pay for it, but that has changed.

Too bad. Sometimes you NEED a divorce before your husband drags you under and into his personal pit of hell and all of his gambling and bad credit and debt problems. In Kansas, if you are married and have a restraining order it is not enforced. There is no respect for the women's rights even if she is being abused.

Women, don't get married. You loose if you do, and your husband begins to think he owns you and visa versa.

People don't own other people and THE STATE has no business in your personal life. It's just there way of keeping track of their empire slaves.

Sorry.. thats the truth as I see it.

As far as sex is concerned, chemistry is what really counts. Sex with friends? If its good, go for it. Only with someone you love? Well... that always makes it better, but life is pretty short... you should enjoy it while you can.

That might be your definition of lust, but it's certainly not mine.

Jesus said to love thy neighbor.

So move in next door to the woman and have at it!

I made a big mistake of being a FWB with a good friend of mine, it caused major problems for both of us. I fell in love with him but he did not feel the same way at all. It wasn't until recently I realized why it did not work, i was not being a real freind at all, i was adding to him sinning and he was the one trying to be a better christian, I was trying, but in a difficult place. But I did realize, sex only made everything worse for me, it never fixed anything for me. And you cannot have sex to get love, it never ever works that way. Now I suffer with the possibility that I may have cervical cancer because i got HPV from one of my ex lovers. I only had two so you know. One of them i was engaged to, but in truth, we didn't really love each other, it was just curiousity but it too hurt me and I have not completely recovered yet. I respect myself, but the thing is, when I decided to be a FWB, it was the worst choice I could have made. I thought I could throw it off like water off my back, but it became the brickwall weighing me down instead. Because I wanted real love, not just sex, and I direspected myself by thinking, life was too short.