I always get a little apprehensive around the holidays, I guess many of us do. I've been single for more holidays than I have spent with a partner. Every year I wonder how I will be spending them, I am never certain. This year I will be working, mostly out of necessity, I don't work, I don't get paid and I cannot afford that, and because an invitation has not been extended to me to join anyone else. That's such a lonely feeling. I hope I've never made anyone feel that way. So, that is why I am writing this. Look into your own lives for those people who might be hoping for an invitation, who may otherwise be spending the holidays alone and make an effort to include them in your own celebrations in some way. Take them shopping, have a special night, lunch....something for them so they do not feel alone and forgotten.

The other thing is, gift-giving. Folks tend to go a bit overboard, go for the grandiose gifts, something that will make a big statement. From someone who has not been able to afford anything but on-sale items, a gift of my favorite, perfume, hand lotion, make-up, a gift certificate to my favorite store that I can no longer afford to shop, my favorite restaurant , etc., means so much than that stuffed bear, talcolm powder, afghan or yet another robe. This year, really look into the needs of folks and do your gift buying based on their actual needs, not what you think they need or want.

The best gift is and has always been your time, not just during the holidays, but throughout the year. A 30-minute lunch, a quick coffee break, a ride to the country, the lake, a shopping trip, just an afternoon chatting, every once in a while throughout the year means so much more than that brightly wrapped package on Christmas morning.

We all have 'those' family members who get on our very last nerves and dread seeing during the holidays. Along the way, I have lost many loved ones. I wish now I'd have found a way to reconcile our differences.

Make this the year that you make an effort to mend some fences. If it doesn't work, then you've tried and will not have the regret of not at least making an effort.

Above all else, look beyond your own condition and see how very fortunate you truly are.

Holidays have become kinda tough for me the last couple years.

(((Mirror))) I hope this is the year that all turns around for you.

It's extremely difficult being lonely during the holidays.

I will get through it. There are a variety of reasons that the holidays are a little tough for me. But Im not a Grinch or anything though.

Yes, it is. The loneliness seems ten-fold compared to the rest of the year.

Sometimes we have to look within to change that.

Almost always, we can get by with a little help from our friends.

Sorry, I didn't mean to drag your thread down.

I agree the Holidays are worse when you are alone. I've spent many a holiday/holidays alone....but this year by choice I am working all the holidays. If anything I get to spend them with the elderly at the nursing home where I do work....and for some of those unfortunate souls, they either have no family at all or their families and have basically forgotten them. Thye just never come to visit their "loved" one who resides there. It's so sad.

For me personally the best way to overcome the holiday 'blues' is by reaching out to others who need a little kindness.

It's absolutely impossible to help someone else out, without getting something back as well.

This will be my second holiday season without the man I loved so dearly. Last year was very difficult, as he had only passed away 6 months before. Even though it was very difficult, I made myself go volunteer at the Children's Hospital, which we had done together previous years...-and got involved with other charities needing help.

Yes, sometimes I still cried, and was very aware that his physical prescence wasn't around me -- but by reaching out to others I truly felt his spirit was there.

This year I will do the same thing...

It's just a part of life -- that no matter how bad it seems we have it, there are always others who suffer a great deal more. It's making their Holidays a little easier, that helps brighten my own.

& hopefully will help many of you as well.

Thanks for this topic, it was beautifully written.

You didn't, please, don't feel that way ((Marley)) I appreciate your thoughts.

No lonelier feeling in the world than being forgotten.

Bless your heart, those folks have you!

This touched my heart. Thank you.

You're absolutely right, the reward of reaching out to someone else, unselfishly, are incomparable, and always come back to you.

There's no greater gift you can give to someone than the knowledge that they are not forgotten, that you think of them from time-to-time and they are loved.

Lilbug i hear you & id be very happy to spend time with ya if i lived closer! Im drawing a portrait in ink of my brother & sis in laws newfoundland for them for xmas. I have an art degree so it will be very cool when done. Id always go with something homemade for a gift before bbought but thats just me. I never care if i get anything i just want to get home & see my family. Id send ya a card if i had ur addy i seend out alot at xmas its the only time all yr i do that.

hiya junebug

yanno, every year is different. Sometimes I just go to the bar and drink. Sometimes I spend it with family. Sometimes I spend it with other people's families.

But looking back they were all good. Cause for every one I remembered it wasn't about me but about the baby

I've never been alone at the holidays....can't imagine how I'd feel (though there are many times I'd love not to have my kids around....) Any way, I guess it must be hard, especially when most everyone else has plans. There's always lots of soup kitchen/homeless shelters that need help before, during & after the holidays. I used to take the kids when they were little to help serve meals. I agree with sweethouston, you get a lot back when you do for others & this might be an option. Hope this helps.

Some beautiful souls writing in this thread...

Very nice to see...

Well....I don't know what to say, 'cept.....you got mail!

<<< Total Grinch.

Hi ya sweetheart....I'm not sure I am supposed to understand this, but I love you for posting it. It's one of the few times I've gotten a glimpse of your heart....that means so very much to me.