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| Topic: Someone please help me... | |
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Consistency is key. Establish rules and hold him to it. My son tries this with me, this morning he got grounded for the night for talking back. You have to love him enough to be firm, spoiling him teaches him nothing. Oh no, wait... it does. It teaches him that you will reward him for bad behavior because you feel guilty. I've been where you are, and my words are not meant to be harsh.... just how it is. Kids need rules, boundaries, and CONSISTENT outcomes every time to feel safe and secure. Oh and hitting him when he is bad teaches him hitting is okay.... really it does. well said  
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Consistency is key. Establish rules and hold him to it. My son tries this with me, this morning he got grounded for the night for talking back. You have to love him enough to be firm, spoiling him teaches him nothing. Oh no, wait... it does. It teaches him that you will reward him for bad behavior because you feel guilty. I've been where you are, and my words are not meant to be harsh.... just how it is. Kids need rules, boundaries, and CONSISTENT outcomes every time to feel safe and secure. Oh and hitting him when he is bad teaches him hitting is okay.... really it does. also on supernanny x |
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3 words...BEAT HIS ASS!!!! Works every time!!!!  Thank You!
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if you spank or hit him you are only teaching him that hitting is an acceptable behavior and that is where the orginal problem is.
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if you spank or hit him you are only teaching him that hitting is an acceptable behavior and that is where the orginal problem is. (supernanny) Hahahahaha just watch and episode of that and you will learn all ya need to know |
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Consistency is key. Establish rules and hold him to it. My son tries this with me, this morning he got grounded for the night for talking back. You have to love him enough to be firm, spoiling him teaches him nothing. Oh no, wait... it does. It teaches him that you will reward him for bad behavior because you feel guilty. I've been where you are, and my words are not meant to be harsh.... just how it is. Kids need rules, boundaries, and CONSISTENT outcomes every time to feel safe and secure. Oh and hitting him when he is bad teaches him hitting is okay.... really it does. also on supernanny x Ha, I'll tell my pediatrician father, which is where I learned this from. He could be a star! 
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OMG, thank you all...I was ready to burst! But I did get in his face and tell him I have had enough and slammed his bedroom door...
News flash, he just came out quite meek and mild and actually said he was sorry...LOL, I must have had the look of RAGE on my face. Maybe now we can have a good day! Thanks again everyone... |
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if you spank or hit him you are only teaching him that hitting is an acceptable behavior and that is where the orginal problem is. This kid is 7 years old, not a toddler. MHO says that he should know better already and time out isn't gonna do the trick. |
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Consistency is key. Establish rules and hold him to it. My son tries this with me, this morning he got grounded for the night for talking back. You have to love him enough to be firm, spoiling him teaches him nothing. Oh no, wait... it does. It teaches him that you will reward him for bad behavior because you feel guilty. I've been where you are, and my words are not meant to be harsh.... just how it is. Kids need rules, boundaries, and CONSISTENT outcomes every time to feel safe and secure. Oh and hitting him when he is bad teaches him hitting is okay.... really it does. also on supernanny x Ha, I'll tell my pediatrician father, which is where I learned this from. He could be a star! Yeah well he taught you a good lesson, you seem very clued up x |
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And now that things are good, I told him we still can't go to his favorite game place...that he need to prove to me that he can be nice...
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Edited by
lilith401
on
Tue 08/26/08 08:05 AM
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Of course he said he was sorry. Expressing remorse is a good thing, but knowing if he means it is another. Do not tolerate disrespect or talking back. If you don't eliminate it now, just wait until he gets bigger and stronger and more articulate. Then.... well... hello conduct disorder.
I wish you loads of luck. You might want to try a therapist for support... the meeting with you and your son will really show him you mean business. It worked wonders for me. ~~~Thanks, Charmaine...
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if you spank or hit him you are only teaching him that hitting is an acceptable behavior and that is where the orginal problem is. (supernanny) Hahahahaha just watch and episode of that and you will learn all ya need to know Actually My children are 22 & 21 and I never have hit them and they never have hit me. I taught them to repsect others and I still say that hitting and spanking only teaches then that it is acceptable. JMO |
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if you spank or hit him you are only teaching him that hitting is an acceptable behavior and that is where the orginal problem is. (supernanny) Hahahahaha just watch and episode of that and you will learn all ya need to know Actually My children are 22 & 21 and I never have hit them and they never have hit me. I taught them to repsect others and I still say that hitting and spanking only teaches then that it is acceptable. JMO I totally agree with that but my case is different...my x husband never stopped him from hitting me as a little child...so my son started to grow up thinking it was the correct thing to do...my x is a sick man... |
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And now that things are good, I told him we still can't go to his favorite game place...that he need to prove to me that he can be nice... Good for u - stick with the tough love and it'll work. |
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if you spank or hit him you are only teaching him that hitting is an acceptable behavior and that is where the orginal problem is. (supernanny) Hahahahaha just watch and episode of that and you will learn all ya need to know Actually My children are 22 & 21 and I never have hit them and they never have hit me. I taught them to repsect others and I still say that hitting and spanking only teaches then that it is acceptable. JMO I totally agree with that but my case is different...my x husband never stopped him from hitting me as a little child...so my son started to grow up thinking it was the correct thing to do...my x is a sick man... But just as Lilith said you need to teach him acceptable behavior in YOUR home. It will not be easy and at times you are gonna want to beat the crap out of him, but you can do it. I had to also when I left my ex and my kids were teenagers. |
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And now that things are good, I told him we still can't go to his favorite game place...that he need to prove to me that he can be nice... Good for u - stick with the tough love and it'll work. Geeze, it took a lot out of me tho... |
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And now that things are good, I told him we still can't go to his favorite game place...that he need to prove to me that he can be nice... Good for u - stick with the tough love and it'll work. Geeze, it took a lot out of me tho... Not to be sarcastic, but since when was parenting about you or your needs? |
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WOW!!!!!! That is all I can think right now, WOW!!!!
I have 2- 13,10, and the day either one of them decides it is ok for them to put their hands on me or disrespect me in any kind of way is the day they wished they lived elsewhere.... It has nothing to do with spoiling the child(ren), it has to do with how you raise them! I have never had to spank my kids, however if it comes to that, HELL YES I WOULD AND THEY KNOW IT! I would NOT put up with a child that does not respect me as their mother, THEY ARE A CHILD AND NEED TO BE KEPT IN A CHILDS PLACE!!! I feel for you. |
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Consistency is key. Establish rules and hold him to it. My son tries this with me, this morning he got grounded for the night for talking back. You have to love him enough to be firm, spoiling him teaches him nothing. Oh no, wait... it does. It teaches him that you will reward him for bad behavior because you feel guilty. I've been where you are, and my words are not meant to be harsh.... just how it is. Kids need rules, boundaries, and CONSISTENT outcomes every time to feel safe and secure. Oh and hitting him when he is bad teaches him hitting is okay.... really it does. I totally agree. and I'm learning...I'm an old mom, LOL and this stuff is'nt easy is it? But the last few times I dragged him to his room (NO TOYS) and this time it worked so the consistancy thing must have something to do with it. |
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You must do this each and every time. If you ever falter or let it go, you start from scratch. It will get worse before it gets better and the 'testing' and 'pushing' will never stop.
This makes me think of a Dr. Philism; You teach people how to treat you. |
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