Community > Dating & Relationships

Topic: How to deal with my white guilt
Texanese Joined Wed 06/27/07 Posts: 87	Tue 08/05/08 09:26 PM
What I really need to know, is how do I apologize to her for the evils of my race? I am working on a poem about all that African-Americans have had to go though. I call it "My Noble Sister". I think if I read it to her with the right amount of emotional projection, she will see I am not the typical evil white man. [/quote Well, while you're at it, write one for the Japanese held in concentrations camps and the Jews who went through the Holocaust. Oh, and all women who until fairly recently were also held in slave like conditions - oh and the Chinese who were slaves in the wild west - oh dang, you could just apologize to everyone for being white... or you could just get over it and realize that evil people do evil things and that you're only responsible for what YOU do.

Jay28ny Joined Thu 03/13/08 Posts: 70	Tue 08/05/08 09:37 PM
RELAX GUY I HAVE DATED PLENTY BLACK WOMEN...DONT BE A RACIST AND THERE WONT BE A PROBLEM.

Jay28ny Joined Thu 03/13/08 Posts: 70	Tue 08/05/08 09:39 PM
oN SECOND THOUGHT YOUR RACE ISNT EVIL THERE JUST SO HAPPENED TO BE SOME IGNORANT PEOPLE MANY YEARS AGO LETS GET OVER THIS ALREADY.

YamilethJ Joined Thu 11/01/07 Posts: 463	Tue 08/05/08 10:07 PM
You can not be responsible for others people actions, you are being very sensitive just by thinking of her as a partner, no worries, I am a latino and I do not categorize people by their race, anyone can make the difference, and we can make the difference I can make it happen by being different than anyone. so good luck take your race with pride without thinking what others do with it. We do not have the fault or the luck to have the race we have. Good luck.

Hawkeyed Joined Tue 07/22/08 Posts: 123	Tue 08/05/08 10:26 PM
Trust me, race is an issue, some people just don't want to acknowledge it. Interracial dating can get messy sometimes in some areas of the country. My sister is currently with a black guy and she gets the "evil eye" from alot of the black women when they go out but that was in texas. When I dated a black woman I had no problems but I live in WA. When a friend of mine (white guy) dated a black woman he recieved the "WTF stares" alot when we go out of town but have no problems when we're at our hometown. So it's all in the demographics that influences one's decision to date you I think. You could be society's norm or exception to the rule. I know for a fact love is color blind. Treat all women the same don't bring up issues because of color and you'll do OK if you got game.

itsmetina Joined Sun 12/09/07 Posts: 18944	Tue 08/05/08 10:37 PM
my gosh where have you been??????????

itsmetina Joined Sun 12/09/07 Posts: 18944	Tue 08/05/08 10:38 PM
African-American women are not interested in Euro-American men because they do not think that Euro-American men are sensitive and emotionally enlightened enough. They think Euro-American men are bigoted, controlling, and not hip. But I want to show her I'm not the typical white male. oh my do you get out much?????????

FearandLoathing Joined Fri 12/28/07 Posts: 30121	Tue 08/05/08 10:50 PM
WTF?!? I thought this died along with Feminine_Ned...err...Respectful_Ned...

Amathyst2 Joined Thu 06/19/08 Posts: 1226	Wed 08/06/08 11:05 AM
African-American women are not interested in Euro-American men because they do not think that Euro-American men are sensitive and emotionally enlightened enough. They think Euro-American men are bigoted, controlling, and not hip. But I want to show her I'm not the typical white male. Why would you make that assumption?? Now that is discrimination! I know you mean well, or atleast I hope you do. And why do you feel the need to apologize for the inappropriate actions of those for you have no association with? That's going to make you look like you're approval-seeking. There is no need. It will only complicate things. There are many black women who date nothing but white men. Also there are some that do not have a preference. It's just whoever captures their heart. I'm slightly offended by your remarks. But at the same, I realize that maybe you just haven't been educated about this matter. Quit making it a race issue.

itsmetina Joined Sun 12/09/07 Posts: 18944	Wed 08/06/08 11:46 AM
get with the new times.The guilt should have ended along time ago .We are probaly going to have a black president soon.

lilith401 Joined Wed 10/31/07 Posts: 19593	Wed 08/06/08 11:51 AM Edited by lilith401 on Wed 08/06/08 11:53 AM
I thought the OP was banned for multiple profiles and admittedly making false posts to gauge reactions and mess with people. I know for a fact this was true as he was posting with two profiles in a thread I was in and caught him myself. I reported him. He also said he did it just to mess with people and no thread he ever created was true. Every scenario was false. He posted that. I'd bet this one is false as well. Who rekindled this thread? It is OLD! Come on people!!!!! Don't any of you remember?

itsmetina Joined Sun 12/09/07 Posts: 18944	Wed 08/06/08 11:53 AM
I thought the OP was banned for multiple profiles and admittedly making false posts to gauge reactions and mess with people. I know for a fact this was true as he was posting with two profiles in a thread I was in and caught him myself. I reported him. He also said he did it just to mess with people and no thread he ever created was true. Every scenario was false. He posted that. I'd bet this one is false as well. Who rekindled this thread? It is OLD! Come on people!!!!! Don't any of you remember? gosh i must have missed it

Etrain Joined Wed 11/21/07 Posts: 19684	Wed 08/06/08 11:53 AM
I thought the OP was banned for multiple profiles and admittedly making false posts to gauge reactions and mess with people. I know for a fact this was true as he was posting with two profiles in a thread I was in and caught him myself. I reported him. He also said he did it just to mess with people and no thread he ever created was true. Every scenario was false. He posted that. I'd bet this one is false as well. Come on people!!!!! Don't any of you remember? It is and he was gone quite a few months ago I remember him quite well

lilith401 Joined Wed 10/31/07 Posts: 19593	Wed 08/06/08 11:55 AM Edited by lilith401 on Wed 08/06/08 11:56 AM
Tina, it wasn't you..... Go to posting history, it tells about 50% of the story.

itsmetina Joined Sun 12/09/07 Posts: 18944	Wed 08/06/08 11:56 AM
Tina, it wasn't you..... Go to posting history, it tells about 50% of the story. yes i didn't bump this had never even read it before it got bumbed back up

bad_girl Joined Tue 07/17/07 Posts: 67379	Wed 08/06/08 12:04 PM
I agree You're not responsible for your entire race so, get off of that soapbox. If she has predjudice's that's her deal. Find yourself a white woman.

lilith401 Joined Wed 10/31/07 Posts: 19593	Wed 08/06/08 12:07 PM
I agree You're not responsible for your entire race so, get off of that soapbox. If she has predjudice's that's her deal. Find yourself a white woman. Please read my bold face post, my dear!

jtip1977 Joined Mon 11/12/07 Posts: 10410	Wed 08/06/08 12:09 PM
I remember this, um, guy????

Stallion99 Joined Tue 08/05/08 Posts: 14	Wed 08/06/08 12:29 PM
Bro just ask her. I don't harbor any slavery grudges and neither do most African Americans. We haven't forgot but that doesn't mean we'll hold it against you. Besides some caucasian people helped free slaves so unless you're the direct decendent of a slave owner don't sweat it. And even if you are as long as YOU believe that slavery and racism is wrong you'll be fine.

Stallion99 Joined Tue 08/05/08 Posts: 14	Fri 08/08/08 01:59 PM Edited by Stallion99 on Fri 08/08/08 02:01 PM
Trust me, race is an issue, some people just don't want to acknowledge it. Interracial dating can get messy sometimes in some areas of the country. My sister is currently with a black guy and she gets the "evil eye" from alot of the black women when they go out but that was in texas. When I dated a black woman I had no problems but I live in WA. When a friend of mine (white guy) dated a black woman he recieved the "WTF stares" alot when we go out of town but have no problems when we're at our hometown. So it's all in the demographics that influences one's decision to date you I think. You could be society's norm or exception to the rule. I know for a fact love is color blind. Treat all women the same don't bring up issues because of color and you'll do OK if you got game. yea you got a point. I was talking to this white girl in Birmingham, MI(majority white community). And one day while we were walking around out there all these people kept staring at us except the one black couple we ran into(no one stared at them by the way). The ones staring had no problem with me being black, it was solely the fact that we were mixed racial "friends." We weren't officially dating but we were flirting with one another and kissing. I almost decked our waitress at a resturaunt we stopped at because she kept giving us funny looks and whispering to her coworker while looking dead at us. A couple months ago me and my ex (before we broke up) were hanging out near the lakes and no one thought twice about her being white and me being black. So it depends on the are you're in at the time.