hmmmm maybe so. il have to think on this one for a bit. i still really do want to have her as a friend tho. looking back on our relationship i see that for a long time? we have mainly BEEN friends with an extra attachment. every now and again she would profess her love for me in some way or another, but we have not done very much sexually in a long time. and its been a long while since she was very affectionate to me very often either. i dont mean this as my having anger twoards her! i simply mean that she hasnt loved me for over 3 months before we broke up and she didnt know how to let me down. and i think she was having a hard time admitting that to herself too considering we had discussed marriage and children! lol. no, i kinda see us at this point as friends who couldnt let go and move on and just clung trying to force it to work even tho it obviously wasnt. and if we were that good of friends? id like to keep that friendship.

thanks much for everyone whos offered me advice. being able to have someone to talk about all this to has really helped me out alot. thanks again everyone!

i know i may be a glutton for punishment? but i really dont want to do that! there wasnt alot of animosity between us and i really would LOVE to still have her as a friend of mine! She and I were so close, even before we dated! Ive told her things ive never told anyone else about, and i honestly believe this is a friendship worth keeping. Is it wrong to want to keep in touch with her like this? anyone else wanna weigh in here? thanks lewis! :)

well, funny thing is when we dated she became my best and closest friend. now that were broken up ive barely heard from her and that hurt too. i just talked with her online for a moment. but just talking with her a tiny bit? feeling like i hadnt lost my closest friend? ..... i feel alot better for the time being!

haha oh im not delusional enough to think she will ever come back to me again. im far more realistic then that! thanks very very much tho. ive actually dug out my old guitar hero thing, i think id suck at a real guitar and i just spent most my money on the new car anyhows!

actually working on myself is what ive been focusing on, since then ive gone out and gotten a new car and have been putting away alot more money (she WAS high maintenince! lol) ive lost a good bit of weight working out alot and going for long walks / jogs. and yet theres still so much time in my day with nothing to do! haha i know myself well enough to realize il never be over my co dependency tho.

thanks for the advice. i dont so much need validation from a new girl, its just that im very co dependent. haha im just not anywhere near as happy as i can be unless i have someone in my life to cuddle and be with. lol i sound like a total sap i know it.

and see thats what i meant about knowing myself. my only previous long term relationship? lol it lasted under 3 months and i was never over it till 2 years later i dated a girl who took me out of that state. i seem to be unable to move on? but at the same time? when im with someone new i instantly move on and give myself to them fully :)

ive been seeing a wonderful girl for the past 9 and a half months. a few days ago she made it very clear to me that she still loved me! ... she just isnt IN love with me anymore.

she let me know how shes never really been single and doesnt want a boyfriend period, and how she still wants us to be friends! (i was her only real close friend even before we dated)

now i find that 2 days later she had already started dating someone new, and she seems to not be interested in returning my messages. (i swear im giving her space and not being a stalker! heh)

im happy for her having moved on, and im not mad at her at all. im simply having a horrid time controlling my racing mind, and getting over it. especially her immediate move onto someone else. (god the unwanted thoughts in my head over that part!) i havent been able to eat or sleep much and im trying to be proactive about it all by moving on and not just sitting around dwelling on it. my heart wont stop pounding sometimes and im completley baffled by what to do with all this free time i suddenly have! i feel like ive not just lost my girlfriend but my best friend all at once.

what do i do? i know myself quite well and know if i found someone new? id be able to be happy and move on to them without it being a total rebound. problem is, in this town? how do you meet someone new! and if thats not the approach to take? then what ELSE do i do?!

thanks for any input here people.

that is seriously one of the most awesome things i have ever read. i must copy paste this into every medium i have at my disposal! :D

my pleasure debbie :) anytime!

and i LOVE the new display pic debbie!

ya know, i have a supremely dirty mind, and yet stuff like that never used to turn me on? .... until the day my ex gf showed me just how sexily she could eat a popsicle..... ive never looked at it the same way haha

after my friend told her husband repeatedly not to whistle at her like a dog? she invented the term "pinch and pull" .... hes never whistled since! maybe thats what you should do mirror?

im not sure if i was actually hit? or if it missed? but i remember the flash hitting like right by me at least and sending me flying to the ground!

im not good at reading signals? but try working with someone whos flirting with you! THAT will make your head spin trying to figure out wether its serious or not! ugh .... been there done that twice. never date people from work! haha

... i feel ill haha

all im sayin? is i could eat alot of cheetos ......

hmmm cheese. so THIS is what ive been doing wrong in attracting ladies all these years! :P figures.

gingerly hands alisha a piece of cheese and snatches his fingers back before they get bit off!

i was once accused of having cottage cheese for brains, does that qualify me to join?