What does it take to make a woman WANT you? We're not talking about what it takes to make a woman LIKE you. Alotta guys get stuck in the Friends Zone with women because they doeverything they can to make a woman LIKE them ... and nothing tomakea woman WANT them. Women LIKE guys who buy them drinks, take them out, keep themcompany, wait around for them, and entertain them whenever they'rebored. Women are SMART - they know when they've got a good thing! But 99% of the time, those women are never EVER going to hook upwith that guy. They lead him on with promises that they neverintend on delivering. And what do these guys do? Do they tell her, "I've got otherplans"? Do they tell her, "Thanks, but I'm busy"? No! They still hang onto these women like puppy dogs, hoping toget the scraps that fall from her table. Now, I'm going to be straight with you in this lesson. The most IMPORTANT secret to making a woman NOT want you - and, forthat matter, NEVER want you -- is to like her so much that you'lldo anything to hang around her. I don't care how great she is. I don't care if she's the love ofyour life, "The One," or the most amazing woman you've ever met. You are NOT her puppy dog. Don't be on call for her.Don't drop all your plans for her.Don't sit at home waiting for her text.Don't ditch your friends for her.Don't be the one she calls ONLY when she needs something.Don't get led on by that little string of hope she keeps danglingin front of you. Go out and start meeting women who DO respect you.Start meeting women who DO want you.Start remembering what it feels like to be a MAN instead of a puppy. The world doesn't revolve around ONE woman. From experience, I cantell you that no matter how great you think a particular woman is,there's another out there who's even greater. Okay, with THAT out of the way, let's talk about what you reallywant to know... what the most important secret to making a womanwantyou is. Is it looks?Is it wealth?Is it confidence? Is it power? All those things are part of it, but they're not THE SINGLE MOSTFUNDAMENTAL THING. I want you to think deeper than what everyone else is telling you. Think deeper than "conventional wisdom." What is the single most fundamental thing that a woman wants in asexual partner? Think about it... What's the one thing she HAS to have? I can tell you straight off that it isn't looks. There are plentyof ugly men with hot girlfriends. I can also tell you that it isn't wealth (luckily for most of us!). Confidence is closer, but I still know shy timid guys who havegirlfriends. So what it it? Get ready for the answer, because it's gonna blow your mind... THE MOST IMPORTANT SECRET TO MAKING WOMEN WANT YOU The one thing a woman HAS to know about someone before feelingattraction is this... ...that he's a MAN. That's IT. Women are attracted to MEN, plain and simple. A MAN is someone who's completely different from her in every way. A MAN is someone who has integrity, knows who he is, and knowswhere he's going. A MAN is someone that a woman can trust to guide her and lead herinto a great future. See, you don't have to be a woman's "best friend" to attract her. In fact, if you TRY to be a woman's "best friend," then you'reputting yourself in the Friends Zone all on your own. A woman will go to other women to share feelings, gossip, and talkabout the neighbors. She'll go to a MAN for her other needs. She'll go to a MAN when she wants to lean on someone strong. She'll go to a MAN when she wants to let loose and go wild. A woman wants a man because he's a MAN ... not because he's her"bestfriend."

1. You must show her that you're safe. Trust is an important issue for most women. This must be demonstrated. So switch #1: in order to proceed, you need SAFETY and TRUST.

2. You must show her that you have either ambition, motivation, or job/financial security. In other words, you must have a life and goals. So switch #2 is demonstrating to her that you have STABILITY and AMBITION. You don't have to be successful, you just have to show the potential to be successful (unless you're in your 30s, at which point you should have achieved something).

3. You must show her that you're different than the other guys, that you are not generic or boring, that she can learn something from you or grow with you, that you have a sense of adventure or creativity or spirituality. So switch #3 is showing her that you HAVE SOMETHING TO OFFER, even if you don't give it to her in the moment. This is where DHVs are useful.

4. You must be the PRIZE of the room. She wants a guy others will envy her for, that she can brag about to her friends. This is where social proof comes in, where story-telling comes in. It's also where alpha qualities come in, cocky/funny, and not supplicating. So switch #4 is demonstrating all of the many qualities of CONFIDENCE, LEADERSHIP, AUTHORITY, and POPULARITY

5. It's a big world and we all feel alone in it, so if you can demonstrate that you UNDERSTAND her and where she comes from, she will feel chemistry. This can largely be done through demonstrating either cultural, mental, emotional, world view, humor, or life/background commonalities. The more obscure and rare a trait that you connect on, the more chemistry you create. So Switch #5 is demonstrating COMMONALITIES in order to trigger CHEMISTRY.

6. You need an aura of depth and mystery. You must maybe show a vulnerable or wounded side of yourself, you must not give away everything for free, you must be a puzzle she wants to figure out and maybe even have a wound she can heal. Switch #6 then is hooking her with your DEPTH and MYSTERY.

7. You must show her that you are NOT horny, but sexual. This is where social proof comes in too, also demonstrating an understanding of her world (liking her for who SHE is). So switch #7 is demonstrating your own LACK OF DESPERATION while showing her that you RECOGNIZE SOMETHING SPECIAL IN HER THAT ATTRACTS YOU TO HER. This is where QUALIFYING is useful, in other words demonstrating that you like her for who she is--even if you are a player.

So I think these are the main switches. I'm open to corrections and additions. Now, if you can FLIP these, she's really going to be into you. It's solid game. I'd love to see another list: of the switches to flip for a ONS -- the switches that over-ride the social programming and make her crave that adventure and abandon.

I'd like to tell you a story...

It's a story that you might find strangely familiar. Don't be alarmed.

Once upon a time, there was a man who was very attracted to a particular woman.

At first, she was just another attractive woman... but the more he got to know her, the more he began to feel attracted to her... and the more time he spent with her, the more that attraction grew into a deep emotional attachment and affection for her.

But there was one problem.

As his emotional attachment grew stronger and stronger, he also grew more and more insecure.

Why?

Because he couldn't tell whether or not she felt the same way towards him.

Sometimes she would say things like "You are so important to me" and "I'm glad that you're in my life"... but nothing ever progressed past the "friendship" stage.

There was an occasional hug, an occasional kiss on the cheek from her... and once she even held his hand for a long time while he talked about an emotional issue.

But something was wrong with the picture.

She just wasn't acting like a woman that was "falling in love". She was acting like a friend.

The insecurity that he felt became a spiral that amplified itself... and the more insecure he became, the more afraid he grew of "screwing things up" by kissing her or asking her to be his girlfriend.

Plus, the more insecure he became, the less time she seemed to want to spend with him.

After spending many days and nights obsessing over this girl, the man finally arrived at the conclusion that if she only knew how HE FELT, that she would feel the same way.

So he made a bold move.

He TOLD HER how he was felt.

He confessed that he was in love, and that he would do anything to be with her.

She looked at him with compassion in her eyes and said "Thank you... I really mean that... but I don't want to mess up our friendship... you're too important to me...".

This only confused the man more.

He didn't know how to take it...

Did it mean that she really loved him too, but that she was afraid of something?

Did it mean that she wasn't ready for a long-term relationship?

Did it mean that she didn't love him, but that she was trying to give him a hint?

Did it mean that he hadn't tried hard enough?

Did it mean that he needed to put everything on the line and REALLY let her know how he felt?

He finally decided that he couldn't go on like this anymore... he had to be with her.

He had to make sure that she knew just how much he wanted to be with her... so he took a big step, bought her a symbolic gift, and wrote her a long, long letter... again confessing his feelings.

And then the unthinkable happened.

She didn't reply.

He called her three times a day for almost a week before reaching her.

She made an excuse about being very busy, and said "I'll try to give you a call soon, I have to go"... and hung up...

...but he never got a call back.

Over the following months, the man tried desperately to understand what went wrong... and what happened.

THE END

OK, I'm back.

Now, wasn't that a sweet story?

Heart warming, huh?

I know, I should keep my day job, and not take up writing romance novels...

Now, let's talk about that story.

That story is basically a MYTH.

And I'm not talking about FICTION here.

I'm talking about a story that rings true for a great majority of men. A story that is timeless. A story that resonates at a deep level because you can IDENTIFY with it.

And why does this particular story resonate for most men?

Because we've all been there in one way or another... at one time or another... and many of us have been there OFTEN in our lives.

Another thing that gives this particular story a lot of power is the powerful negative emotions that it stirs... as a result of the powerful negative experiences that it reminds us of...

Stories and situations like this one really FASCINATE me.

They fascinate me because I see them as an opportunity to UNDERSTAND and SOLVE the puzzles that they represent.

In this particular situation I think there is a solution.

And it lies in understanding a secret that women know but MEN DON'T.

And that secret comes down to the reality that if a woman isn't ATTRACTED to a man, all of his attempts to confess his love, convince her to like him, and court her BACKFIRE.

In other words, they not only DON'T WORK, they actually make things WORSE.

In other words, the very things that a man does to try to make a woman LIKE HIM make her NOT like him. They make her run.

All those great intentions and emotional dedication actual cause the man feeling them to do things that make her go away.

It sucks.

And I hope that by explaining the process of how this happens to you I'll help you avoid this painful situation in your own future...


THE "INSTANT EWWW"

I'm always fascinated by the idea that we humans don't always understand the message that we're communicating to others...

So often we think that because we WANT to communicate a message that others are going to NATURALLY understand what we're trying to say.

Have you ever seen a guy in a foreign car that has wheels on it that cost more than the car itself... with his stereo blasting... and a muffler that somehow AMPLIFIES the raw sound of the 4-cylinder motor...?

Have you ever thought to yourself "I don't think that car is communicating the message to women that he thinks it is"...?

Yea, I have too.

Well here's the deal:

If you do something to "let a woman know how you feel"... but she isn't ATTRACTED to you, then it's going to backfire.

It's going to trigger a feeling that like to call the "Instant Ewww".

The Instant Ewww is just as powerful as the physical and emotional response of ATTRACTION.

Once a woman feels it, YOU'RE DONE.

It's over.

It's like hammering a RAILROAD SPIKE into the coffin.

Once a woman feels the Instant Ewww, she will start behaving differently.

In short, she'll disappear.

So where did I get the concept of the "Instant Ewww"?

I got it from WOMEN.

I have actually heard SEVERAL women use the word "Ewww" when describing how they felt about a guy that was "confessing his love"... of course, these were guys that weren't loved in return.

So what causes the Instant Ewww?

And why would a woman feel it towards a man who was trying to be nice... a guy who was giving her a gift or telling her how he feels?

Because if you think about it from HER perspective, you'll realize that the moment a you do something to "confess", you have created a TURNING POINT in the relationship.

Up until that point, you were harmless.

I mean, women always know how men feel.

She already knew you wanted her.

She knew it from the beginning.

But now that you've started pursuing her and talking about how you feel, you've created a NEGATIVE TENSION that is VERY uncomfortable.

You've triggered an emotion that is repulsive to women. And it does repel them.

In summary...

You can't "make a woman like you" or "change how she feels about you" by doing nice things for her...

Doing "nice" things for a woman who isn't attracted to you HURTS you. It backfires. Worse, it creates the "Instant Ewww" feeling that makes it so she'll NEVER like you.

Men make this mistake over and over again in life because they're doing what MAKES SENSE to them. They're doing it because they don't have an understanding of ATTRACTION.

I mean, If you have a friend, and you like them, and you want to make them like you more... and you do some nice thing for them, they will probably like you more.

On the other hand...

If you have a woman that you "like" in a romantic way, and she doesn't "feel it" for you, and you do something nice for her because you want HER to like you more, it will BACKFIRE... and she will not only NOT like you more, she will most likely distance herself from you.

Guys think that they need to communicate when they like a woman... as if that's part of the necessary process of getting a girl.

In their minds, it goes like this:

Like her>Tell her you like her>She likes you

Well remember... if you follow this pattern yourself with women who aren't ATTRACTED to you, then it's going to BACKFIRE.

If she's not into you, then it goes like THIS:

She thinks of you as a friend>You tell her you like her>She gets the "Instant Ewwws" and never wants to be around you again...


THE ANSWER

There are really TWO answers to this problem.

The first answer is what to do if you're in a situation where you like a particular girl, but you don't know if she likes you back.

DON'T GET HEAVY WITH HER.

Don't buy her a big gift and write a love letter...

Don't send her ten dozen roses to her work with a not that says "From your secret admirer".

Don't call her three times a day.

And DON'T CONFESS YOUR LOVE for her.

If you want to know how she feels about you, KISS HER. use a "kiss test"

As a rule of thumb, don't get heavier than HER. Use SIGNALS from her to find out how she feels... and if you don't know how to read and create those signals, then LEARN.

Asking a woman if she's interested in your in a romantic way, or if you are "her type" will actually DESTROY the chances that she'll like you.

Really.

The SECOND answer is to not get into this particular situation in the FIRST PLACE. Avoid it entirely.

And how does one do that?

One does that by creating ATTRACTION from the beginning.

One does that by understanding the dynamics of how and why women have the physical and emotional response of ATTRACTION triggered.

One does that by knowing what you're doing FROM THE BEGINNING.

Most men believe women only seek guys that are handsome, tall,
rich and famous - and by believing into this B.S. they effectively close any opportunities for themselves.Russian women are essentially looking for: Men who are intelligent, kind, financially secure,
marriage-minded, faithful, honest, physically fit, decent-looking, have a sense of humor, and don't abuse alcohol. You see, those are all personality traits, and you have the solitary CONTROL over them.But that's just part of the picture.

The things above are what Russian women think they want in a
mate.The truth is we often do not understand ourselves. Most people are not used to SELF-REFLECTION. We have certain biases imposed on us by our society and culture, and those biases often contradict our biological
selves. In other words, our subconscious may want DIFFERENT things
than our conscious.

To understand the difference between what women (consciously)
'think' they want and what they (subconsciously) REALLY want
is crucial to your success.During the introduction stage, when she has no preference for you or anyone else, she mostly consciously ANALYZES your
information.She may still answer you positively if your profile fits her
image of a "good man" (Russian women don't look for an ideal;
they just want somebody who is good, stable and NORMAL), but
if you do not give her what she really wants, she will
eventually reject you: "I cannot give orders to my heart."

This means you cannot neglect a woman's emotions when trying
to win her affection. Even though women think all they need
is a good man, what they seek is a man who STIRS THEIR
EMOTIONS.Women are EMOTIONAL creatures. They need 'emotional food' in a relationship, just like you need food to keep your body
going. This emotional food is called ROMANCE.Women are romance JUNKIES. This is why women often fall for womanizers.

They do know who they are dealing with, they just CANNOT
help being attracted to men who deliver QUALITY emotional
food for their emotional receptors. Excitement, ANTICIPATION, thrill, emotional ups and downs,
these all are necessary requirements in the game of romance,
just like a suit and tie are necessary requirements in the
corporate game.

Imagine a guy in shorts and an old T-shirt in a corporate
meeting. This is how YOU will look in the game of romance
if you refuse to follow its rules.

Always try to give her something that will make her FEEL
STRONGLY about you and your relationships. As long as she
FEELS SOMETHING, she is in. As soon as she becomes BORED,
she is out.

Make her DO SOMETHING for YOU, so she has to put in an
effort.

We value things we put effort into.

Only give her your effort if you see it returned at least
as strongly.

Do not try to BUY her affection with gifts or compliments;
this won't work. Make her occasional gift or compliment, to
make her feel good about herself (not to make her feel good
about YOU).

Only do it because you WANT to do it, not because you EXPECT
something in return.

Remember, no matter how much money you spend on her, she
does not owe you a thing. Only spend as much money as you
can afford to have wasted.

DON'T do sacrifices for her.

When deciding on a gift, it does not have to be expensive,
and it does not have to be useful; on the contrary, the most
senseless romantic gestures work the best.

Romance itself is useless.

It is a waste.

Like a courtship dance in insects or a bird song, it is
absolutely worthless in terms of producing value.

Most women will be more impressed by a simple flower from
the top of a mountain than by a luxury bouquet from an
expensive florist.

Both are useless, but the former is MUCH MORE romantic.

Summing it up: What women think they want and what they
REALLY want are two DIFFERENT things. Women say they want
security and stability, while in reality they want STRONG
EMOTIONAL EXPERIENCES. They take the game of romance
seriously.