Why do women always assume the guys are going for the hit and run? I have never done that and I take pride in the fact that i don't have that mentality. I think i'm in too much of a hurry to date that i see past the time of friendship part. Thats my inexperience again.lol I have always been a quiet person I guess its time for me to break out of this shell and start talking and meeting more people. Before i get too old to start a family.

Good luck on your trip.

A short notice relocation would be very hard for me in this economy, i would need to sell my house and change colleges, and find another good paying hourly job. Does that sound like an excuse or hard times? Don't get me wrong i would love to be with the woman of my dreams and would try anything to get there,(anything in my power)even if I had to move, but i'm afraid of moving and things not working out.

Is it a bad thing to like to talk to someone one on one instead of on the net?

Who like the Dogs in here?
Write the name of the Breed and anything you wanna share.

I would be happy to practice dating you. LOL!

I could probably teach you a lot.

Seriously, you need to practice to develop confidence. But you can learn a lot about dating and talking to women without becoming a pick up artist or attending one of their boot camps.

You might even try an escort service if you just want to practice. I'm sure a professional escort could teach you a lot if you asked. Mind you, I'm not suggesting a hooker, as that is illegal in most states.

Brush up on manners, find out nice places to go, etc. It can't hurt and it can be fun.

But here is a great tip. Learn to dance, and you will have your pick of many many women. Take a dance class and learn ballroom dancing.

I love that scene in true lies when Arnold and Jamie danced. So romantic and awesome!

The problem is more complicated than you may realize. Loneliness is a drag. It tears art us becasue we are not like Lizards which are at best Semi-Social. What is worst is we all want familiar ground. Ground that is safe. Now safe ground and trust are different but they likewise are also the same thing.

We are supposed to trust those closest to us. it is part of social nature. It is also how a functional relationship works. Unfortunately there are good people and bad people and bad people lie and do anything to look like they are wearing a halo but horns hide under the hair line.

Likewise when you got involved you compromised your self in ways that were unfair to you. When you broke up with your ex you probably in the back of your mind knew he was bad for you. Likewise it sounds like his parents are likewise toxic. Something about you probably made you want to know what you had with your ex was not a lie. When he fessed up your world shattered. Breaking up with your other LTR was overcompensation for you to deal with the reality of what could have been the truth but you didn't want to believe it for your self. When you did find out the truth you now are falling into a self hatred that can and will become self destructive and overcompensating is one way that can happen.

Now granted I am guessing a whole lot here but it is one thing to accomplish things becasue you want to becasue it is what you are but you should never loose yourself to a relationship. If you can't be you in a relationship then you should not be in a relationship. But likewise having the guilt and fear complex whacking around the back 40 in your mind is not doing you any favors. This is a lot more than guilt and fear though.

What you are now in is a form of PTSD and the hardest part is looking at personal behavior and identifying the bad behaviors that are self destructive. You didn't kill anyone but now you are bearing a burden that really is not your own. This was way out of your hands. It was your ex who did the act and he has to pay for his deeds. But in a way you got sucked right into his world of lies and deceit and then right when you were about to love him unconditionally, that novel type love for a man wrongly accused it turns out he was really justly accused.

Right now the most you can do is look at yourself and admit you fuqued up and fuqued up badly. You did to yourself what you should not be doing. You didn't do bad. And YES VIRGINA SANTA CLAUSE DOES HATE YOU! (THAT IS A JOKE GOD DAMN IT!) Then pat yourself on the back, welcome yourself to humanity and an unfair life, drink a six pack of Bartles and James watermelon Wine Coolers, Shots of Jack Daniels and lemon slices, Absinths, whatever floats your boat (up to and including 4:20 cause any time of day or night is 4:20!) and after you go to bed when you wake up move on and start over from square one. Letting go is the hardest part. Part of letting go is finally admitting defeat. It is a sort of love surgery. You got to love yourself again. Until you do that you can never move on. Don't let a bad relationship foul YOU up!

That which does not kill makes you stronger! Also wisdom sometimes comes at a tragically high price. What you learned about people was expensive emotionally but it should not rule you either.

Are you the sum of what you are or the sum of what others make you out to be?

Really this is so complicated I could write an entire 150 page thesis on this but I tried to boil it down as simply as I could. I am guessing a lot here but in the end I do see self loathing a lot. you have to stop looking at your weaknesses as flaws. You have to look at the weaknesses as things to be made stronger or turned to strengths. The hard core Draconian view love as an emotional weakness. Thankfully I am Draconian but not hard core. I just think love is something we have to be very careful with.

And this song is for you...

http://youtu.be/dXGa__ECvnM

We all do!

i guess i should have started dating a couple years before i met her then i would have been more experienced, she was my first real relationship other than small talk. I guess being honest about your thoughts is bad even if the other person says they are your friend. So what does a single mother really value in a guy who didn't father her child/children?