Don't think so

No!! no!! You are not thinking straight ,I think you may need counselling

If I were a beautiful woman I would not be very impressed ,

Welcome , quite a big call ,best of luck

Selfies are not difficult or expensive to take

I am constantly chased by younger women (ha ha some on here young enough to be my Granddaughter ), I have a rule no one younger than my daughter

I want a woman who is a whore in the living room , a lady in the kitchen and a cook in the bedroom

My thing went back to childhood ,I was just 10 when my father died,my mother had no money and a poorly paid cleaning job ,two men from the local church charity called with a parcel it was shoes for me and my 3yr old sister, every time I saw these men they mentioned the bloody shoes which I hated , I did odd jobs for people and saved up , not for toys or other boy things but a pair of fashionable at the time pointed toe shoes

Welcome , they will be soon

I did a thread on shoes a bit back ,I have about 120 pairs of footwear, that includes slippers about 12 pairs ,even indoors on my own I have to colour coordinate ,A shoeaholic and guilty of several shoeicidal errors ie ,they will stretch a bit in time
Clothes are another story , I have a pair of socks in good condition that I sometimes wear that were my fathers and he died in 1960

Welcome Swindon seems to be a Conservative stronghold so your request may only generate a limited response

Welcome and good luck, is that a goat in the distance behind you ?

Welcome you will need full PPI and a virus test first , I do three tours, bicycle,segway and stretch limo

I would be interested in a signed limited edition print

Masticating

Welcome ,I was there last weekend there were dozens just gagging for it

Police stop a suspicious looking man late at night with a sack over his shoulder , "what's in the sack sir?" Manure says the man "put the sack on the floor and step back " one officer pats him down while the other looks in the sack , indeed it is full of manure , "why are you carrying a sack of manure in a town centre at 11.30 pm?"
He says I was in the pub earlier on and some one shouted "who will give me £20 for a Sackakakki ?" I will I shouted , I thought I was buying a motorbike

Non stop laughter ,a blast

Terrible