Men never read profiles. They just become interested with just one look at the photos and don't even care if you are here for the forums or not. Then they have the audacity to ask you if you can please tell them something about yourself. WTF???

None of us can truly figure it out until we are near midlife. Men don't express it well and women mistake a tiny gesture for love eternal. Until a woman's **** are hanging around her knees and a man's nads are slapping toilet water, who can truly understand it?

First dates are ice breakers and not to be taken to the extent of "I can spend the rest of my life with this person". What the person is like online as opposed to offline are two entirely different things. You would have to be given the benefit of a doubt when they tell you something and then you build from there.

There is always the old pic issue, the weight issue, the children issues, among others. Not all of these come up on a first date but at least one of them can prevent a first date: children. You are reading too much into this, especially with the comment on "your little army" and if you can actually get to the first date, then make the most of it. And if there is chemistry? Then you have a second date.

I wish you luck and just let "it" flow from you.

Dreams were built
From imaginations that soared
Daylight opened the world
Possibilities seemed endless
Fragrance of fresh, cut grass
The birds chirping without a care
Days begin anew
With lessons learned

Lazy afternoons, tired eyes
Body seeking comfort on the floor
Channels splash the television screen
Nothing much but the evil that men do
Fact or fiction

Kitchen full of love
Stove top or oven
A taste of Heaven
Cooling on the window
Table set for 4

This is a whirlwind
Events that shape
Hands that mold
Days that close
With the light
Of a moon
That illuminates the faces
With eyes that stare up at the stars

Fastforward to the days
when events of life is past
Take no notice of love
That a kitchen once knew
The busy humming of a mother
Is now replaced
By the sounds of an empty refrigerator

People wandering aimlessly
Their life's juice running dry
The imaginations that once soared
And landed firmly on the ground
Has now withered and died
Their hands produce nothing
Nothing but the misery
That is forced upon them

No friend to comfort them
No friend to give them shelter
NO friend to feed them
Are we destined to finish
Our lives in search
Of what once was?
Will the happiness we knew
Return as in the days of our youth?

Who can save us
But God himself?
Children are going hungry
Parents are giving them what is left
Who will give their parents
When there is nothing left?

World leaders sit back
Wipe their mouths
Bellies full
While a nation goes hungry
On Sundays,
We were taught as we sat on the knees
Of those who held a faith
That could not be waivered
Give to Caesar what is Caesar's
How is it that you think
The Leaders of this Nation
Get to sit back?
Get to wipe their mouths?

Holy wars, hunger strikes, earthquakes
Buildings will fall
Take from the poor
And give it to the poorer
Rahmah is still weeping for her children


Only One can bring Justice
At The End of Days

Canvas is still bare
As I begin
With a stroke of my brush here and there
All of it seems abstract
Until I am sure
Of what I am creating
Now it all seems clear
As my mind and hands
Bring about something unique
Colors showing the true essence
Of my soul


Feelings, thoughts, ideas
Forming a life
Unknowing and unthinking
Steps not taken
All of it on a whim
Heart is beating furiously
As my spirit calms it


Reactions and tears
Pushing away reality
Putting off the inevitable
Time is fleeting
Eventually got to know
Will I know?

Will anyone come to understand
What this means to me?
What if I tear it down
And begin again?
Dreams, shattered and torn
Is it worth letting go?
Or shall I take away another's joy
That my creation brings?

Will other's look upon it
And in deep thought
Try to figure out the meaning
Of what this creation
Will bring to the world,
Be it happiness or sorrow?

The burden of proof
Lies with in my hands
As I wrestle with demons
That torment me
That try to influence my thoughts
That prefer for me
To live my life in agony
For their pure enjoyment

I will bring my creation to life......

That is just childish. Crying because the person hurt you is one thing, but crying and then resorting to childish **** is another. If it went that far as to crying, then the person isn't worth the breath it takes to inhale and then open your mouth and say things to them.

The person is either feeling good or bad that he/she made you cry or really, really good that they can make you cry and say nasty things at the same time because they got the effect they wanted was to piss you off and hurt you at the same time.

What happened?

Anyone who gets annoyed by birds chirping is an azzhat with issues. There are worse things to get annoyed by like noisy neighbors playing dizzy Bachata or Reggaeton music at 2am.

For you to believe the person would be dependant on their character. Do you know them to be upright or lowdown? As far as being in the forums, the friends made are strictly in the forums unless you know that person offline then that is different because you know them personally.

Even if you know that person via instant messaging and you trust them implicitly, you would need proof if it is online. Why? The true gist of a message cannot be felt sometimes, if rarely, and you may have to decide yourself what the person said by being directed to the proof or just plain asking them yourself. Sometimes it can and there is no need for proof of the other person's integrity, as you are reading exactly what was shown to you by that person.

As far as an offline thing, I wouldn't pay too much attention. People talk a lot for the sake of venting and if you pay too much mind, things can be taken to an extreme. Not worth it spending one night in jail over.

Feelings are as fleeting as the years that tell the truth on the lines on someone's face. Honestly, how would you know anything if you are still a virgin? Need to grow a second skin in the dating world and just take everything with a grain of salt.

Not saying that everyone lies about such things, but you don't have a fool proof way of finding out or actually being able to "tell" if the person is being truthful. Because they told you they are doesn't necessarily make it true.

@Diligent:

I have heard about Krav Maga and have never seen it demonstrated. Would be interesting.

Take a chance and message me. I would never turn a friend away.

@Carpenter:

My bitterness? Who told you that I was looking to date off this place in the first place? How dare you sit in judgement when the forums are meant for giving opinions and advice. She posted and I responded. I didn't come here to pat anyone on the back and say "awwwwww" but say what was on my mind. Mendy2 is a big girl and stopped wearing diapers a long time ago so find someone else's hair to smooth and someone else to get at where you know for a fact is sitting on a throne of judgement.

BTW, this is not Romper Room. No one is denying the OP an opportunity for anything. People set their own limitations by enabling their mates, staying with people they know that aren't right for them and making every possible excuse to avoid the obvious.

My take on the situation as far as the 25 years goes, was what I posted. This is a situation where I call bs on you, exactly that---POT MEET KETTLE. You talk as if you are an authority on people trying to take the opportunity to find happiness on this site but there you are trying to take my opportunity to exercise my first amendment right----FREEDOM OF SPEECH!

You really are bold talking all that smack and no pic to post. Yeah, real tough! Not!

Now, you can sit down.

If you do "find" her, how do you know that she is telling you the truth?

Seems you wouldn't be anymore sure of her "purity" than you are of coming up with a plan of actually finding her.

Nuff said.....

There's not much to say in the way of this situation. If you enable a person where it is impossible to change, don't expect him to change with you. He just may learn his lesson if the next person he finds doesn't put up with his nonsense.


Not making light of the condition in which you find yourself, but the fact that you are sick and your commitment to your SO have nothing to do with each other. In fact, some might say that it is a reason for him to stay with you. And what do you think of a relationship like this? That you would rather settle for pity than for an honest mate that doesn't think of himself but his significant other in need?

I am sorry for you plight. But the role of the long suffering mate has gone out the window when women began demonstrations for equal rights and burned their bras in protest. I would rather suffer alone and in peace than be by the side of a ne'er-do-well.

Hello to all! I eat clean, work out 5-6 days a week (cardio and weights)and my health is fantastic. I would like to add self defense because I was always fascinated as a youngster with martial arts. As I get older, I set goals that I tackle and some take a little more time and effort.

As I have mentioned, I would like to take up self defense for protection and also for fitness. A friend of mine said that an instructor had mentioned that it is difficult for short people (I am 4'11") to take self defense.

What do you think? True or false?

After 25 years, that kinda takes the hope for anyone looking to find a true mate and live out the rest of their years. If you couldn't find it in 25 years of marriage, you definitely aren't going to find it here.

And you are definitely wrong as to why we are all here. But then again, I don't have to try so hard to find someone. Just saying....

This is a loaded question. Either you get to the bottom of it and see what is going on and if it can be worked out or you bail. No sense in staying in a relationship where nothing is forthcoming.

NO one falls in and out of love so easily. Like weight loss, relationships have plateaus. Always believe in that saying: when the honeymoon is over......

And when it is, not a reason to keep going until you both have exhausted all options of making it work. I have heard plenty of people say "we still love each other but we couldn't make it work". Baloney! They didn't try hard enough or they let it get stale for so long that when they did try to salvage something from the relationship, it was too late.

Try to beat the odds if you care for someone and when all else fails, walk away with your head up and no regrets. At least you gave it a shot.

@Lewis@123:

Bravo! This is the best post I have seen yet on this thread and it rocks. Love Granny Clampett.

@OP:

As for the interracial babies coming down the pike, they are beautiful. My youngest son is my right hand man around here and his father is African American.

I guess the worries will come up because no matter how much older our children get, we will always be parents and worry like heck when ever they get themselves into situations. Having a baby with someone that you are still getting to know is going to have it's obstacles, so your son needs to be prepared.

I have often told my son that he is trying to make his place in this world and there is no room right now for a baby in his life. He is 21 and still in college so he is doing the right thing right now. But all it takes is for just one that has him missing meals just because the thought of her has taken the appetite away and that is it.

Grandchildren are a person's crowning glory. No use worrying about something that has not happened yet. So try to enjoy that little baby when he/she comes into your life. Things will be the same for you and them whether they know each other a few months or a few years.

Too many scammers on here to take anyone seriously. This is my second day on this site and I got two that sent me messages. Obvious to me that people sometimes don't read profiles so I didn't put too much effort into it.

Putting up "just here for the forums" doesn't stop anyone. True, you never know from messaging a person from time to time, but my mind is not on dating online-----bad experiences.