I guess because I am such an animal lover, I would have no complaints being around so many lovely creatures, that wouldn't be any threat to a friendship let alone a relationship.

look, not to be rude Gossip but my feelings on that matter are really none of anyone's business; i was merely trying to point that i can relate to gf's negative feelings towards her own, because of what i went through when i was younger. it's just the luck of the draw whether you get a nice parent or a bad one, why would you choose to be offended by what i said, it's got nothing to do with YOUR dad.

to the person who said "there's always a job for someone who wants one badly enough" after handing in resumes to endless amounts of employers every week, and copping NO constantly, getting into interviews with 20 other people (when they are only after 1 person) i find your statement a little arrogant. I guess Australia isn't like the US and other countries, here employers want you to have years and years of experience in most positions before they even consider you. Problem is because of my university degree, many places especially the super markets will only give someone only one or two shifts a month if they think they are going to run off somewhere else.
-s

well I not a smoker and I got NO interest whatsoever in girlfriend's money. money corrupts, i prefer to earn my own way in the world

okay, i will put it like this, if someone's honest opinion of someone else is that they think this person is a complete, retard, ****head or whatever, then they should keep that opinion to themselves. if however, their honest opinion is something more along the lines of you offering an open, honest non-judgemental criticism well that's different.

unsure, I am looking HARD for a full-time job, or at least another casual job to match with my current working hours. no luck yet, there's been a recession going on, remember?

i warn you, what i'm about to say is a bit loaded, and i ask members that choose to read on to be the non-judgemental, objective types.

i had a bad childhood and felt like killing my father many times for the way he treated me, i never acted out on it of course because of fear of jail, he died anyway though. The point is, I can relate to her feelings of feeling trapped, given how she is not super woman, and her moving out on her own, giving the rising costs of rentals is not that easy for her.

She is NOT a sugar momma, while i do admit that I generally have slightly more respect for a woman that actually makes an effort to do something in society then one that just wants to sit home all day and expects a man to go to work and provide EVERYTHING for her (that's way too traditional for my liking, not even my parents did that and they were very traditional-my mother was a teacher), when a woman is working full-time yet has grown up with outdated 1950's values, that makes it very hard. It's been hard enough to find and keep my current job.

RKISIT I think you have hit the nail on the head with this one, so thanks.

i never had a problem with your honesty gosspip...at least Tina, the love of my life never gossis about me :))

ohh i have SO nailed this one

If an axe murderer or big ogre or something was hunting some innocent girl, about to chop her head off or something, and asked me if she went to the left into the forest or right towards the river, if she had gone into the forests I would definitely point to the river. and run like hell.

evening (it's after 9 here in Aussie land)

horses are such beautiful amazing creatures...

anyway, as i said, i stand by this statement, that if someone's "honest" opinion is a simplistic solution to a complex social problem, then that would annoy me, people are entitled to their opinion sure...

another thing that annoyed me, is that i was just being myself online one day, and had one girl say to me in response to me saying that i'm a dog lover "oh no offense, i can see why a lot of people probably don't talk to you much" i mean what the hell??

nobody can accept people for who they are anymore, and i will always be just me and would sooner have little to no friends who like me for who i am then a lot of bad shallow friends that couldn't care less if i died tomorrow, aye?

hey, if anyone is heading to Australia and wants to waste money, I sell holidays!! ha ha.

anyway, my point on this is, that there is no such thing as a "useless" purchase as every person you give your money too, helps them make profit which helps money continue to make the world go around.

thanks for your opinion melody girl. got no further comments or questions at this point though, so thanks.



okay, so what when wrong with that relationship?? what could he have done so bad, that you were left out of your parents will?

well my honest opinion on this is that it depends on the situation.

oh no i don't think i need that sorry

she tells me each and everyday that she loves me

it would be pointless if somebody's parents liked me, but the woman herself did not.

Melody Girl, thanks for the reply.


"Hi! First, sorry I misread your statement that you DO understand why some members said to run away. I read, "...can't understand..." tongue2

I can't define what "real love" is for you or anyone but myself."

Yeah, I understand that...

"I know that my expectations in a partner are HIGH and I would never allow even a friend in my life with as many problems and dysfunction as you have described."

That's a bit intolerant isn't it? what if someone has a few issues, but turns out to be the total love of your life who adores you in every way you have ever wanted?

""Normal" is subjective to the lifestyle in which we live or were raised. Some people think its normal to steal or feign while others would never consider this pathology."

Yesss...that sounds very open minded!

"I personally don't put up with drama; no, I don't believe relationships should have drama. If people allow it then they probably think it's normal. For me, drama and baggage is not normal. That is the way I choose to live my life."

Don't take this the wrong way, but I think it's a bit unrealistic of you to expect there not to be any problems in a relationship, EVER, without challenges, how do you learn and grow? I admit, that I would have preferred the challenges I face not to be so hard sometimes, but it is what it is.

"I have a quick trigger and a sensitive BS/red flag meter. I have a big red circle, with a diagonal line through it, on my forehead that rules my world. How I came up with my idea of normal is only valid in my life. You will develop your own ideas of what is acceptable and what isn't as you experience life."

Perhaps you have had a difficult childhood that has caused you to have a very strong defense mechanism? I just don't think it's realistic to expect relationships without any dramas at all, life just does not work like that imho. people will be human. I mean look at this way, if I was a kind of guy that would accept only a girl that would totally worship and love and adore me, and give herself to me completely in every possible way (body, mind, and spirit) and not complain about anything, EVER, you would think I was a selfish pig. The biggest complaint I hear from women is that the guys in their life only care about one thing.

"When you ask for opinions on a public forum you will have a different answer from each person. There are no absolutes. Use common sense and think about consequences rather than thinking emotionally. How you handle this will, of course, shape your dating future and dictate your relationship skills (or lack of skills)."

lol...

"Enabling: allow, facilitate, make possible
Co-dependent: mutually supporting, mutually dependent
Basically, the two of you will encourage and support each other’s bad habits or abnormal/impaired behavior."

What is wrong with being mutually supporting? As for mutually dependent, well no single person is an island, I agree that too much dependency can be a huge weakness though.


"Personally, I would rather shoot myself in the foot that get envolved with anyone like you have described."

Describe a relationship you have been in, that hasn't had any dramas whatsoever Melody. And if there is one, are you still in it, and if not, what made you choose to leave?

"Remember, this is YOUR life and no one will look after you but YOU. Life is too short to be miserable or to constantly ride a rollercoaster of other people's garbage. It’s better to be single than to be in a toxic relationship. Relationships are not difficult with the right person nor should they cause you to post for help on an internet forum. winking"

Have you found the right person for you?

"Best wishes with internalizing this situation. flowerforyou"

thanks for the flower.

hey Shasta, it's hard because I want to respect everyone's point of view, and not be mean about how I respond to others, but yes, it is a concern of mine when people respond to something in such a simplistic manner to complex life problems.

Most people when buying something from work are smart and have in their back of their minds "what's in it for me". Making sales is quite challenging, as people have to want the product you have to sell. That's why I deeply respect people that waste their money on just about anything, it makes my life easier. :)

lonetar, she was telling me that SHE feels like killing them in a text message yesterday, but didn't want to go to jail so may as well kill herself. I don't think it's right to condone violence, and it would be my wish if at all possible for all the hatred and negativity to me to stop, now I am not saying I don't take some responsibility, I've made some decisions in this relationship that I definitely regret, if I could do it all over again I would have waited for longer until I visited her so many times.

"break up with her and tell her the reason is because her parents are driving the two of you apart."

if that was going to make her move out and stand on her own two feet, I might consider that option...unfortunately, that would be more likely to send the message "you can't trust this man, he won't be there for you when times get hard," and would only push her away from me, and I could lose her forever.

Iam4u thank you for your advice, you show much wisdom. So do you gossip.

Tessa, I find your side of it all inspiring :)

Melody Girl:

"You can't understand why someone (me as well) would suggest you run? DRAMA; dysfunction; co-dependency; enabling!"

Don't all relationships have drama? Is there any relationship that does not have some form of dysfunction? Also, what do you mean by co-dependency and enabling?

"What you have typed is not normal. Why would you want to live a life like this? Suicidal?? She has issues. You are too young to get involved with crap like this and you will ruin your life, develop poor ideas of what "love" is and never have a functional relationship."

Okay, fair call; so what would you say is a GOOD idea about what love is? what does a functional relationship look like to you? How do you feel it will "ruin" my life? And furthermore, what do you consider a "normal" relationship?

I am sorry for playing devil's advocate here, I hope you know the only reason I am asking these questions is because I respect your opinion Melody as much as anyone else's on here.

ooops my bad that person was a five. i will give summer time a 10 as i like summer.